Before I storm in and complain, do ALL primary school teachers ...

[Spidermama]

... play music in the classroom when the kids are working?

My dd has complained of having to listen to crap music (eg - Heartbeat, why do you miss when my baby kisses me etc) when she's trying to get on with her literacy worksheets.

My ds then said his teacher also puts on music. (Different teacher, different school).

Also my ds who's 7 told me today his class didn't get their French lesson because instead they watched the end of A Bugs Life.

WTF?

is that no to my q malory?

hatrick I just don't like the PITA parents thing, it makes me feel even shittier about our situation (if that's possible). Which is of course nobody's problem but mine, and you should all go on enjoying it.

Or, in other words, it's a horrible thread imo

i have preschoolers can you tell?

Why not?

Some parent are a PITA though, just ;like some teachers are PITA.

You wouldn't think someone was a bit of a PITA to complain when a teacher went to her own mother's funeral!?

Or aparent complaining about a teacher was was carrying out the parents's own wishes?

Greeny I have no idea what going on, but if you need a chat about feeling like the PITA parent (having been there / being there) do CAT me- happy to lend and ear X

And I really, really do think that there is an essential difference between wanting what is best for your child and pushing for it.....which most teachers see as very positive.

And those parents who have wildly unrealistic expectations of their dc's teachers and make their lives a misery.

I find the idea of being a PITA parent a bit odd. It's like being cranky with someone who's about to take your appendix out. You want a teacher to feel positive about you and your children, not dismay at the sight of you.

oh, sorry, no, am not a teacher

am just very OLD so it just sounds allergically weird to me

probably comes under the category of 'i didn't have it so why should my children have it'

but how much silence do the children get?

ds looks battered enough after 2.5 hours at preschool

I know what you mean NKF, it does depend on why you're doing it (and crucially who youre up against- for example our soon to be ex head told the local Sn support team that ASD doesn't exist and its just us as crap aprents {knowing full well we were on an party line and could hear)) so we had to take the school on directly- I don't get the ones who just want everything their way though. You see them at our school all the time (its yummy mummy central) - 'ooh Algernon fancies a snack at 10 today instead of 10.30, could you arrange that please?' (er not they're in assembly). Why do they do that? Why can't they teach their kids to compromise, or sometimes even just shut up and accept minor irritations? It does sometimes seem that many poeple just do not caer about how others see them and that way danger lies.

Peachy thanks! That makes me feel glad to work where I do!
The parents take no shit and are very down to earth coupled with some for whom having their children in full time education has been an ambition, not a right.

A teacher friend of mine once had a call from a parent who complained that the plates at lunchtime were cold. Apparently her son wasn't used to eating hot food off a cold plate. Can you imagine having the time and inclination to make such a call? No voice in your head that said "hang on a minute" as you picked up the phone.

What an awful experience for you. I hope you let them know you'd heard.

NO!!! Cold plates.
That's got to be an urban myth!!!!!

Oh yes they knew we heard, she knew we were there listening- we sued it in the tatement to explain why tehy couldn't meet DS1's needs and got funding for him tohave part time 1-1, DS3 is beinga ssessed at the moment, but if she wasn't ;eaving would go elsewhere.

My aprents always treated education as a gidt too- Dad was second youngest of 16 and couldn't afford to go to Gramamr after passing his 11+, had to leave and get a crap job. Thats rubbed off on me too I think- although I'm more 'lentil weavery' about it and include things like trips to the forest into their education which my aprents would never have done, it was pure book work for them (mine are 7, 6 and almost 4).

I worked in a school in the Valleys last academic year, and the input of the aprenst there- many of whom lost their jobs in the mines and lost everything at that moment- was incredible: the kids seemed to have far more of a notion of the value of what they did have, than the richer kids around here qwho often fel cheated that they can't go to the private school (we're one of the few token working class families LOL)

No really it's true. To be fair, it was a supremely precious school but even so.

LOL at my typing- can you tell I was yelling at DS1 to go back to bed at the same time?

I liked "used" becoming "sued".

My colleague today was telling me of a PITA who doesn't want his nursery age child to play with water. (She might catch a cold...)

i think if its instrumental stuff it wouldn't distract them but stuff with words might?

I would object to background music whilst the dc are learning/concentrating in class too. I find some of the examples for use of music in the classroom reasonable, such as putting on a song to signal to small dc that it's time to tidy up or something. I could imagine my dd might like that. She would be REALLY annoyed at crap radio music playing in the background though while she's writing! I could imagine if they were doing painting or something, a bit of music in the background could be nice, something different, lift the mood.

Although some studies do claim that listening to some types of classical music can have a positive effect on learning, no one claims that pop music does!

To my shame, I will admit that I even quite like that heartbeat one

I wouldn't like it. Has your daughter raised the issue with the teacher? It might come better from her than from you (she's directly affected and can say how it's affecting her work, and you'll look like Typical Middle Class Precious Parent particularly if you tell the teacher you'd prefer Mozart), and it would give her practice in standing up for herself. If she's not prepared to do so even with encouragement and a promise to back her up if need be, and considers that it is affecting her work, (or she's about 5 - sorry, I don't know how old she is) then you should go in.

Does your school have a parent's questionnaire at the end of the year?

A low key but effective approach might be to say in the questionnaire that you think it doesn't help your child. This could lead to the school asking teachers to assess music use in the classroom.

I've seen it used very effectively in class as a calming tool and to help focus but only instrumental music; I would have thought it's more appropriate to any kind of literacy or numeracy work - but that's just my opinion - I'm no expert.

I'm not a teacher - although did do a teaching degree as a mature student
As a school parent I have been the victim of a PITA parent though - when my child beat hers in a school swimming race she complained that I had put her child off by looking at it

They're leaving at the end of this term thank god