Is it too soon for a September 2017 reception support thread?

[BellaGoth]

Anybody about to embark on school applications and want to chat? I don't know about anyone else but I think I'll need a place to get advice / support over the next year!

DS will be 4 in January and I think will be very ready for school come September. Our catchment school is single form entry and very over-subscribed but we live quite close so fingers crossed we'll get in!

First school tours next week, quite looking forward to it!

Unfortunately not Bella, and I've had a lot of conflicting information from here there and everywhere and I'm just as confused as I was on Tuesday morning. I am just going to wait and see if I get any replies to my emails but I'm not very confident, It would help if my LA had clearer information on their website but it's useless

It's going to be difficult on Monday taking my son back to nursery with the other parents there who got their places and getting excited and I'm dreading anyone asking me about it. My son's been talking about the place non stop for the last few days and it's been killing me inside and I'm wondering if it would be kinder if we just didn't go

New to the thread, I hope you don't mind me gatecrashing at this late date but I've been in total denial of the whole process until it hit me in the face last week.

No I wanted to post because I'm in a similar position in that my DS didn't get into any of our choices and the rest of his nursery class got a place in the school. He's also been going there since September 2015 and apparently that's counted for nothing. It's a faith school, not our faith, but we've lost out because of the sibling link rule. The criteria at that school is any sibling link, regardless of catchment. There was only DS without a sibling link, he lost his place to a child who has a sibling link but didn't go to the nursery. I'm so upset for him. Anyway, I don't want him to go back there because I want him to forget about it. Wanting to be with his friends will ruin his new school for him, ideally I want to move him to the nursery of his new school now so that he gets used to the place but I realise that this is probably not going to happen. There is an alternative nursery that may have spaces that is not connected to a school so this is my plan b. Otherwise, I'll let him go back to his current nursery but not this week, I don't want him to hear the parents gushing about how relived they are to have a place with no consideration as to how that might affect my child. I'm also worried that they'll start transition into reception and my boy will think that's what he'll be doing too but if he has to go back there then I'll speak to the school about it.

IMO it's kinder not to go. I know that being out of nursery completely is not the right thing for my son either but he will only go back there if there is absolutely no alternative at this point. I hope you hear from schools this week, surely your previous situation has to be taken into consideration? This is definitely one of those 'compelling' reasons. How long ago did everything happen? Is there a chance that there are different staff there now? I too am confused about the appeal process.

Coffee thanks for your post to me and I'm really sorry you're going through the same. Bella I promise I'm not trying to hijack or derail your thread either! Forgive me.

The lack of siblings I think has definitely gone against me as well, some of my older DC went there but are long gone now and doing GCSEs. We live about 1.3 miles from the school too so I knew distance was against me.
Like you I also want my son to forget the place and his friends but so far we don't have a new school to focus on instead, I've made no progress whatsoever this week with that. I hope you do get your son in to the new school's nursery though or your Plan B one. I would like to have an option like that so my son isn't bored for months but no chance.
The transition to reception is one of the things putting me off taking him back as well, he'll either have to take part in it not understanding he won't really be going there or he'll have to sit out while the rest go in, horrible either way and not something I want to let happen. Actually I agree with you that it's kinder not to go and I already made that decision after my last post, it's not nice for him to be at home either but probably the lesser of two bad situations.

You'd think my previous situation would be taken in to consideration yes but evidently it hasn't, and that was very insensitive and quite a smack in the face really. I know the past doesn't get my son a place at the school I want but it should have stopped us only being offered the problem school. There's a small C of E school on my street that always has loads of spare places every year and we weren't even considered for that amazingly enough.
How long ago did everything happen, well it was a while back now between 2007-12 but it might as well have been yesterday for the impact it's had on us and we've really struggled. My older three are very aggressive and unattached and I just lost interest in life and everything I used to do. We're even trying to move house to get away from the locality of it so what's happened now is ironic. The only different staff that I'm aware of is that the Deputy Head recently retired otherwise it's the same Head and Idk who else.
The school I want for my youngest now was what saved us, they were a rescue life line when things went wrong and helped put us back together. I learned yesterday from a former teacher that it's become a lot more popular.

With regards to the appeals process it's a lot stricter for reception than older year groups and I don't qualify so it's not gonna happen.

Good luck to you and your son though and all the best to resolve things

Apologies for the long rant

No that all sounds so difficult, I'm so sorry that you're being made to have such a hard time with this. I hope that one of the other schools can take your son, it's the not knowing that is so stressful and the LEA should be making this process easier not harder.

It's the lack of compassion that's struck me in a few cases (mainly on here) as the LEAs don't seem to have any and are putting children where they think they fit rather than considering individual circumstance. There were a few things in our application which made a compelling case for my DS but it's as if they haven't read it.

I think I'd be keeping him off No and I'll be doing the same (if I can get DH to agree) if plan B doesn't work out. I don't want him to be bored for months either but it's the transition that will be harder if he has to leave his friends. Hugs to you, I do understand the anxiety and I hope that it'll all work out.

Good luck to everyone hoping for information today. It's the first day of term for our area today so I imagine they'll be innudated with enquiries for places. I didn't think this process would be so awful.

No and coffee I started this thread as a place for those of us with children starting school to chat and support each other, through applications to starting school and beyond if need be. That's exactly what you're doing so please don't apologise for hijacking or joining late - you're not!

If this thread can help even a little bit a shall be very happy.

The system is entirely rules-driven, there is no subjective consideration of why a family want a particular school, just how well they fit the admissions criteria.

There will be priority for DC in the nursery only if it lists this as an admission category

What you write will matter only if it relates to how your DC fit the entrance criteria (eg eldest child was placed in this school when we moved as it was the only one with space, you stated our other DC will be considered as in-catchment siblings despite our address. Email (date) refers).

I know this may sound rather harsh on this thread, but I think it's fairly important that you engage with the system as it is, not as you think it should be (whole different thread needed for that, I think)

Appreciate that, Bella!

Coffee you're not wrong that it's stressful! I never had any of this with my older ones and it never even had to cross my mind that it would ever be an issue where I live at the moment but it seems to be the norm everywhere now Hugs to you too I hope you are getting your husband's support on your decisions from today as well

meditrina, I know that and no doubt so does Coffee and I definitely am engaging with the system as it is. But I would just make the point that it wasn't necessary to offer my son the school in question and that the LA are well aware of my history with it

Thank you Bella this thread has really helped me, it's impossible to get advice irl as most people I know got their first choice and although people mean well, most of the information is based on how they think things should be. So many people have told me to appeal, but it's not that simple as we all know. Meditrina yes I appreciate that and hopefully I'm engaging with the way things are - I know I can't change them but I do need to express how I feel about them which is hard to do irl without offending people. My issue with the system is that the criteria varies so widely within the same authority, our first choice school accepts out of catchment siblings before in catchment non siblings yet our assigned school doesn't. I guess it's more not being able to understand why there is such a difference when they're all in the same system. I do accept the system.

No my DH has been ok with things so far but we hit a bump in the road today when the nursery said they don't have any places and neither does the plan B establishment. So, we've decided DS will return to his nursery tomorrow until May half term. He'll leave at May half term and complete his 15 hours with our childminder. The school said they do transition sessions in July, they have to confirm the actual dates, but I know my DS will settle more easily if he doesn't have his current nursery as an immediate comparison so it's best if he isn't there at the time. We're actually on holiday for 2 weeks during the final half term so there will only be a few weeks where he's not in nursery. It's not ideal and it does mean that he'll be returning to nursery but it's a sort of solution. I kept him off today to avoid the hysteria that would have dominated drop off this morning. Have you heard from any of the schools today?

Hopefully now that the Easter Holidays are over you guys might find it easier to talk to schools and get better advice. Do you know where you are on waiting lists? Apologies if you've said already, my phone is playing up and won't let me scroll back.

Glad you've got a plan now Coffee even if it's not what you really wanted, shame you couldn't get those other nursery places though (typical).
Yes I heard back from both schools but they said the same thing, that I have to go through the LA admissions office, so am not further forwards with it. The uncertainty is really worrying because I have absolutely no idea where he is going to end up now, there's nothing in the pipeline to cling to. I accept he can't have the school I want but what alternative I just don't know.

No Bella I have no idea where he is on the waiting lists but I know they could change several times before September so not sure there's a great deal of point focusing on that. I don't live in an afluent area so there won't be anyone changing to private etc.

I've managed to speak to the school we've been given and they told us about the transition days that my DS can attend so I'm pleased with that. There's no room for him in the nursery which has messed up my plans but at least he can go there before he starts school.

I've spoken to admissions today and they were quite helpful but it's definitely not worth appealing based on the fact that the school is an ICS school. Even if they found in our favour my DS couldn't have a place because they can't have a class size bigger than 30 and a place can't be withdrawn. An appeal panel may find in our favour but there still wouldn't be a difference in the outcome. Admissions said we are 2 on the waiting lists, the list is disbanded in December and then we just have to phone from that point and see if there are any spaces.

So my plans now are to stay put until half term then change the 15 hours to our childminder, DS can do the transition sessions and hopefully it'll all work out! No have you had any luck today? Have the admissions team said anything about your situation?

If you've set your heart on a school then read the entrance criteria carefully.

They can and do change year to year. What applies one year may not the next. It should be on the schools website.

The one my children went to was largely faith based criteria. ( which caused problems and a degree of upset at the local Church.)

It then went to largely geographical criteria. Fairer and in keeping with what Church schools were initially set up to do.

The main secondary is heavily faith based - but each of the contributory parish priests seeming to interpret the criteria in their own way. As do parents - I've seen applications with dead priests named as faith referees.

"I've spoken to admissions today and they were quite helpful but it's definitely not worth appealing based on the fact that the school is an ICS school. Even if they found in our favour my DS couldn't have a place because they can't have a class size bigger than 30 and a place can't be withdrawn."

This is utter twaddle. If an appeal panel finds in your favour, then the school has to admit, and it will take them over numbers (stop and think - if there were under 30 in the class, you wouldn't need to appeal).

But, pupils admitted by appeal are 'excepted' ie they aren't counted for ICS numbers.

Coffee I'm pleased to hear you've got the transition days even though it's little consolation. I've certainly got my fingers crossed for you and your son. No I haven't had any luck or heard from Admissions at all, they asked me a week ago what I wanted to do and I never heard from them again. Dread to think how all this is gonna end really

JCSP That's insane, the dead priests thing

Just to be clear - twaddle is what the 'admissions' bod was saying (not the poster on the receiving end of it)

It's useful that they have clarified that the appeal will be under ICS rules. It is hard to win an ICS appeal, but if you do the school has to admit your DC. It sounds as if someone (a someone who parents should be able to rely on) has badly misunderstood and therefore garbled the information. Or is speaking to deter (which I'm afraid I rather suspect owing to the mention of withdrawing an offer from another child - something that simply cannot happen - so why mention it?)

Meditrina really?? Thank you - I had no idea that they could go over the numbers, the man on the phone was adamant that even if we won then my DS still wouldn't have a place because that status doesn't allow more than 30 by law. This really is a minefield, there's conflicting information all over the place. And yes, I was led to believe that I could trust their word. Realistically, we are 2nd on the waiting list for our first choice school. We didn't get a place because we didn't fit into the first 3 criteria (the 3rd being distance from the school so obviously we 'fit' but others were closer). Trying to be honest with myself but it's clouded by how much we want this school - is there much point in putting in an appeal?

No I'm sorry to hear that - I think you need to keep on at them, appeal and make sure that they are all aware that the relationship between you and the school has broken down. There has to be some sort of mitigating circumstance that covers this kind of thing, it's not a typical situation.

Has anyone else managed to get their DC into the nursery of their assigned school if they weren't already there?

Unfortunately I don't have any grounds to appeal and I've reminded the LA about the previous issues, although they should have a record of it as they had to sort out a move for my older children at the time. It looks like they just ignore it because it doesn't fit in to the standard allocation of places criteria which is ok for them and too bad for me. This election has come at a bad time for this as well because my MP is normally excellent at helping sort out school issues but I guess they don't take on case work when Parliament's been disolved.

It's unfortunate you can't get your son in to the nursery of the school you've been allocated, that would've helped in getting him used to the place and people and moved on from the one he's in now where he has to be with people who are all lucky enough to be staying together in September. I know he's got the transition days but that's very little and not enough opportunity for him to get used to it if he doesn't initially like it. But dont be too hard on yourself for being clouded by how much you wanted the other school, it's your son's education after all and such a big, important and long term matter.

coffeebreak5 - sorry to read you didn't get a place. I think you have to be realistic and as you ask - no i don't think there is any point appealing. If no mistake has been made, you simply live further than other people - what is there to appeal? There is often lots of movement between now and september - so stay on the waiting list and you may get lucky....you just never know.
good luck.

How's everything everybody getting on?

DS is starting to get quite excited now, which is nice. Going shopping tomorrow so might pick up a few bits of uniform.

Still no contact from the school yet. Getting impatient now as friends going to other schools have got settling in dates already!

Hello. Hope everyone is feeling ok. I just wanted to say 3 years ago my dd was not given a place at the school she was at nursery and was the only one to be sent elsewhere. Once she understood she was going to a different school she was fine, she did all the transition stuff knowing it would be similar but in a different place. We drove past her 'new' school lots and looked at the website and prospectus a lot. She was very involved in uniform buying. When she started she was shy but made good friends and i think it actually worked out really well. She is really happy. A lot of our fear comes with the emotional overlay of adults which the little ones don't have. They are remarkably robust. I realize some of you have very real concerns but if it is mostly worry about not being with friends and a new start i wish I hadnt worried (and cried etc ! ) as much as I did - I didn't need to.

Thank you for taking the time to write that didi. I think even those of us who got our first choice have worries about how our DC will manage the transition. You're quite right though, the vast majority will take it all in their stride!

We're not getting on well now unfortunately. The school we've missed out on talked me in to taking my son back to nursery because they said he was top of the waiting list and were confident he'd get a place but only if I kept him there. Then they told me different things every day for the next two weeks, kept us hanging on, only to very late on Wednesday night email me and admit that everyone else had accepted their places. To add insult they tried to talk me in to appealing and listed what I should say but I already know you can't appeal on ICS grounds. The email also said they thought all this would have left a bitter taste and we might want to start afresh elsewhere (like we have a choice?!), and that the HT and DHT were keen that we were supported. That's ironic given that neither of them have contacted me once about any of this in the entire process.

The teacher who wrote the email said a place might come up in the next couple of months or I could wait and see if everyone turned up in September but it was the expectation that I find my son somewhere else in the meantime. As you can see from my other posts I've been doing that but with no success so my son still has no place anywhere. She's told me one pack of lies after another and kept us hanging on a string so much that I regret taking my son back there after Easter now. I haven't replied to her email and I returned his uniform, I am determined to keep my dignity and am just trying to look forwards now not back but it's difficult when other schools I've approached insist I go through the LA but the LA won't deal with me, I can't win.

I don't mean to sound so angry but this whole thing has done my head in and I'm no nearer getting my son a place than I was on offers day so am very frustrated and if I don't fight for him who will

The second round offers are being sent out by end of this week.

I got my fourth choice in London so I am keeping my fingers crossed I get bumped up!

Does anyone know how we are notified if we get bumped up during the second round offers?

Is it via email or post?

I am in London and supposedly the second round offers are due out today.