Not happy dd not allowed to sit next to her best friend anymore

[SSSandy]

I don't know if this is usual practice but 2 months after school begin the teacher shuffled some of the dc around and dd was told she can no longer sit next to her bestfriend but has to sit between two boys she doesn't much like and her friend has to sit next to a girl he doesn't like. Does this happen in your dc's class too.

They've just started school and dd and her friend were very happy. They've been best friends for about 4 years, playing together nearly every day and they're not disruptive, do their work, play with other dc too, they're not problem makers in any way.

Dd is SO unhappy. She cried all afternoon and I don't know what to do about it. There's no chance to meet up with this friend out of school at the moment so this is really the only chance they had to be close.

Thinking of approaching the teacher about it. Makes me really angry because it seems so pointless. A Polish mum told me this happened in her ds' class a lot too and it may be common practice in Germany, I don't know.

Also bear in mind that because SSSandy is in Germany, the approach required in dealings with officialdom (yes, even the primary teacher) is v. different from that in England.

In Germany they don't read the whole English, "Oh, I just wondered... Is there any way... Could you possibly..." routine as politeness, they see it as weakness. To be taken seriously in Germany you need to be assertive to a level which would shade well into rudeness in UK terms.

aha...didn't realise she's not in england.

No wonder that dd got upset. She is just copying her mums behaviour if things dont go her way. Her mum just stormed off in a huff because she didn't agree with what was said on MN. And wont be back.

Thankfully in this world we dont all agree with each other and if someone says something to upset you then discuss it, dont storm off and be childish.

Jeez

Am I glad, I am working and missed this, I agree with Kid and other posters who in essence posted that life will bring bigger disappointments.

Not really worth doing a JF over IMO.

I teach in secondary school , so it might be a little different. However I would find it unacceptable for a parent to demand a particular seating plan for their child.

The teacher isn't tutoring one child, but is *teaching a class. A good seating plan in a class can make all the difference in the world to the smooth running of the class, and good learning in the students.

Unless there was a specific issue, such as potential bullying, of specific SEN, I would expect the parents to let me do my work as a trained professional.

agree with martianbishop and I am teaching in primary....

I was told by a child in my school nursery class that "her dad was going to come in and beat me up" when I asked why she said " because you have not put me with my friend in reception" thats teaching yr 4yr old child to respect their teacher!!!! and why were they seperated cos they talked non stop and distracted each other, in my opinion children can play together at breaks and in the reception classroom activities but carpet time was for learning and those 2 were not. children r at school to learn and to to have fun and teachers will make choices that parents won't agree with but there is always a reason why.

Part of the issue is, I think, that unless you have taught a class, you don't really undertand how little it can take to wreck a productive classroom dynamic.

I have classes where, if two students sit next to each other, they do no work and the rest of the class does half the work they usualy get through! Split them up, and the class runs like clock work!

And sometimes you place children in groups outside their freindship groups because you want them to learn to get on with other people, or you might want a real mix up of abilities, so you don't get one 'super bright group' that stnads out!

There can be all sorts of excellent reasons for doing this, whic, to be blunt, you may not 'get' unless you have taught a class.

Actually I sympathise - if my 4 year old was crying about this sort of thing, I would ask the teacher - mainly so I could say something helpful to my DD.

I helped in a classroom recently and the teacher split up two friends who have known eachother since babyhood because the more confident one was completely bossing the other around - even though the friend was grinning and happy. I guess it will be helpful for both to have a chance to shine on their own.

The teacher also mixed up the groups so not all the really confident ones were together all the time. There was a new girl who hardly anyone was talking to and she was encouraged to join with the other girls - it almost broke my heart she looked so pleased.

"But I think it was Sandy's tone that angered many of us the 'demand and get what I want mentality."

Well precisely. I'm not a teacher but I can see that would get up the nose somewhat!!! I find that attitude so confrontational and unpleasant.

Odd to go off in a huff about one comment.

Has anyone realized yet that Sunday was a full moon?

Methinks this thread has lunar undertones.