Advice please on delayed school entry for summer born. Has anyone done it?

[PetaPipa]

I am not sure whether my dd should start school at the beginning of reception or delay one, two or even three terms. She has a late July birthday so is very young in the year, but is fairly mature. I love her nursery and she is really happy there - part of me would like her to stay there longer and grow in confidence and to just enjoy being a preschooler for longer. However, on the other hand, I am very concerned that delaying her start in school could affect her socially. So, I'm looking for advice!
If you delayed your child's entry to school do you regret it, or would you do it again? Why?
Are there any parents of summer borns who wish they had delayed entry to reception? Why?
Thanks in advance for any replies!

I wouldn't hold a child back a term.

With some SN it might be worth while holding them back a year - but only if I was sure they could continue in the new year group.

So far dd can - go to toilet by herself
- enjoys pre school and not worries about being left.
-enjoys playing with other children.
-recognises a photo of her for her peg.
tries really hard most of the time to listen and follow instructions.
- counts to 10 and knows alphabet.

but she can't - dress herself
is easily distracted
- hard to understand at times she is going to be starting speech therapy.
- doesn't recognise any letters or numbers.
- struggles sometimes with understanding what people mean.
- prone to screaming or getting upset if she can't do something (but that's with us not sure how it will be with a teacher)
- still gets tired in the day time

verdict?

She could also unwrap a sandwich bag and tubs in a lunch box or pour a drink of water. use cutlery

very capable as far as food and drink are concerned

Giles - the only one of those I would work on is the getting dressed - and you have plenty of time.

With the speech, I have known lots of children start school with speech problems. I would let the school know asap so they can try to get the correct provision in place.

Recognising letters and numbers is something to be taught in reception, not an entry requirement.

Oh I do assume you are having her hearing checked/monitored?

Oh that's all been checked it's fine. She's improved vastly over the past year and I've had her speech assessed twice. first time she was signed off but told to bring her back if by her birthday she hadn't shown much improvement.

second time I was told her range is ok and her understanding om but they will work on helping her to speak more clearly and her sentence structure. still waiting months later for that to come through. nursery working with her too.

I've no concerns over all. But do feel she will struggle a bit as she's used to free flow play and is better befriending children younger than her rather than kids her own age

Somebody was interviewed on TV earlier this morning on this very subject. Don't know if anyone else saw it. Seems they are obliged to let the child start a year late but can insist they miss a year or at any time in the future make them go up a year. As in make them go to secondary a year early or make them start in year 8.

I would agree with those people recommending you don't have your child start in Year 1 . My August DD sailed through reception but found it hard to adjust to Year 1 as did quite a few others in her class. It would have been very difficult if she had also been adjusting to the school and making new friends. Also, not everything about being summer- born is bad!! DD has turned out to be tall and well-developed - she would stand out in the year below. She has always been well-challenged by the work - no boredom problems.

Goodness, it's a minefield! Giles, I hope you are able to make the right choice too!

Thanks peta

seems to be a very mixed bag doesn't it. Some say it was the right thing to do for their child, others have concerns about being behind and friendships etc.

Dd has had a few people come and go in her classes since reception. The new kids always end up being talked about as if they were there all along. to the point ya end up sick of hearing their names .
I hope whatever you choose it works out

Yes, it's difficult. It seems like such a big decision and I just feel whichever way I go I'll end up regretting it . Without being able to see into the future it's really impossible to know what is best.

Yes, it's difficult. It seems like such a big decision and I just feel whichever way I go I'll end up regretting it . Without being able to see into the future it's really impossible to know what is best.

Just a word of warning, in my experience the children who started part time (in DS1's year the school insisted the summer borns to go part time for the first term but are not allowed to now) just didn't settle into the friendships very well. Come January when they went full time, they were like different children, far more happy and settled.

So yku think deferring and going full time works out better than starting in set ember but remaining part time?

that's good to know and something to think about. Thank you

It all depends on the school.

DCs school had everyone start parttime for 2 weeks. Then Autumn born go Full time until half term; except for DD1 she was the only autumn girl in her class and was actually not very happy in the afternoons for the first 1/2 term. Also except DD2's year, almost everyone was born in March, so they had a cut off at the end of March and then everyone else went full time after 1/2 term. Two of mine were summer borns, and they coped fine, made friends and settled.

So I'd really ask the school, see how they do settling, what the other children do. Ask things like what happens if your child gets over tired. What happens in the morning, what happens in the afternoon?

Also 6 months is a long time at this age - and it is surprising how much they change and learn.

DD is late August born; she turned 4 just over a week before she started school.

She is now in year 3 and has absolutely excelled at school; she got level 3 in all her KS1 SATs. DD is a confident, bright and very happy girl at school.

Before she started school I couldn't have predicted she would take to it so well; she was always good with numbers, particularly mental arithmetic, but she started school not being able to read or write well. I must admit I was worried about her starting school and being the youngest. I think we envisage a class of September born 5 year-olds and, in reality, that is never the case.

DS is 3 and in the school nursery. He is May born and, whilst I see a huge difference in the age he will be when he starts school compared to his sister, he is also considered a summer born. I have no qualms at all and will let him start with his peers. He already has an advantage in that he is willingly doing structured phonics and numeracy lessons, so is prepared for what school will be like. Added to that, he is in a mixed nursery, reception and year 1 class; I feel school nursery is definitely preparing him better for reception that DD's private nursery did.

Unless there are SEN to consider or severe prematurity, I really feel that children should start school in their appropriate age group. Yes, it's unfair that the August born children are the youngest, but there has to be a cut-off somewhere.

I agree the age per class is important. DD's Infant class was made up with mainly March-August born ones, I think at lest 2/3 of the 30 children.

I am sure this also makes a difference. They swapped children in Juniors and you see less differences apart from a couple where you have a September girl, very mature and advanced. But she is the odd one out, not the norm as well.

Choosing to go part-time can backfire if your child is the only one. One of my friend's DD is at a different school where one boy went home after lunch. My friend said the boy was ridiculed for being a baby who needed a nap and she said the teacher did their best to stop the talk but he stuck out.

Have you seen this on the BBC website today?

www.bbc.co.uk/news/education-31729536

Thanks spider, I hadn't seen that. I think I'm feeling especially negative about it all at the moment as dd is being SO difficult in the evenings at the moment, due to tiredness. I know there are another 6 months to go yet, but she only does one full day and two half days at the moment. I can't see her coping with 5 full days without meltdowns every evening. and that cannot be good for anyone. She's already in bed before 7 - I can't really get her any more sleep!

She will be shattered at first - they all are. My DS's Reception class always let them have a sleep if they needed to though. They have a gigantic teddy-bear in a quiet corner with cushions and books and there's often at least one tiny person curled up asleep on his lap in the afternoons.

Remember a school day is a lot shorter than an 8-6 nursery day as well.

I think most Reception classes have some children having a nap in the reading corner in the run up to christmas.

Raising, when I say nursery I mean nursery school, sorry. her full day is 9 til 3.30. it still exhausts her! But good to hear that there are nap opportunities!

This was on this mornings news. www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-31724976

No nap opportunities at our school - nor at any of the others we viewed. Don't take it for granted; make your own observations.

Also, don't rely on published 'settling in policies' on webpages. Check with the reception teacher if they are up to date. At our school, settling in procedures were nothing like described in the official documents.

I have neither cheerful nor sad stories to tell about Reception, as my older daughter started school at nine and the younger one hasn't gone at all.

My philosophy, however, is to give the child whatever she seems to need currently. The future is uncertain: your daughter may or may not enjoy "big school", and may or may not find it harder to fit in if she starts later rather than earlier. But this fact you do know: she is very happy and thriving where she is. To me, making a change away from a setting in which she is really happy would require a very strong reason.

Having said that, she'll grow and change over the next six months, and nursery may no longer be such a wonderful place for her. Keep an eye on her. If that happens, you can alter your plans and send her to school earlier after all.