Taking dd out 1 afternoon/week

[LalaDipsey]

I had forgotten, during the endless last term, how beautifully happy and loving and happy dd (4) is! School has turned her into a tantrumming screaming nightmare a lot of the time as she has been shattered . We don't do any other after school or weekend activities so I don't have those to stop. What I would really like to do is pick her up at lunchtime on a Wednesday for the next term until she legally has to be there the following term (July birthday).
I feel that I know my dd best and she is just sooo young for 8.45-3.15 5 days a week.
What do you reckon my chances are of getting the hm to agree??!!

We did 2 afternoons off with July born DS for 1st 2 terms of reception. Worked well for him. No problems with other children.

Why not take a chance and try it if she is so tired? Was same problem for my DS but much improved stamina now he is 5.

I have a summer born and am researching my options for him starting school when the time comes. There is a Facebook group which is full of very useful info as to your legal rights re flexible schooling, start dates etc - i's called Flexible School Admissions for Summer Borns if you want to search for it on FB. And I don't think you are being remotely PFB but are looking to get the best for your child within an imperfect system. good luck!

My child attended reception half days until Easter when he was 5. He wasn't coping with the long days. We slowly introduced afternoons and he was fine with that. Teachers felt he wasn't coping, and encouraged us to take him out. Some purists would say they should have insisted he stay and be unhappy. Why????. He was so happy with school as a result of shorter days, settled well in the classroom environment, and went in every morning cheerfully.
Friday afternoon is often golden time, so the best bit of the week, so perhaps Wednesday is a better afternoon to have off.

My daughter went fulltime at age, and although on the surface she coped, she was dreadful after school. Because she had no obvious difficulties with school I went with the herd...I wish I hadn't, she was so frazzled by it.

When I was that age, school was only until lunchtime. In Ireland Reception and Yr 1 children only stay until lunchtime. They aren't the worse educated for it in the longrun

Friend always took her daughter out for whole of Friday in reception till age/5 worked for them.

hello OP

I would speak to them, no harm in asking.
My dd is much older and involved in an activity that includes many dc throughout the nation travelling during school time on a weekly basis. All these dc are allowed at least the afternoon off school.
It is up to the HT and all schools are different.
Tou know your dd best, I say go for it.

My DS is a May baby. When he started Reception, doing 8.30am-3.15pm, he would be absolutely shattered after school. He would just sit slumped watching TV until tea time (I don't think he ate too much school lunch which probably didn't help energy levels either). Have you checked how much being eaten? And I agree not enough water won't help... and I sometimes think schools don't actively encourage too much water... as this equals too many toilet visits.
School was a total shock. He'd previously been to nursery 4 mornings a week, but 5 full days is way different. We had to start doing everything earlier, tea at 4.45pm, bath at 5.45pm and in bed, lights out by 6.30pm. It worked fine for us. He's now 7 (longer school day 8.30-4pm) and still needs his sleep, he is in bed and lights out by 7.30pm. He does no clubs after school. He just wants to come home, do his homework and play. Autumn term is a long one, with huge excitement at the end. It's also dark in the mornings and dark in the evenings. By the end of last term DS was completely worn out and even though asleep just after 7.30pm each evening, I was having to wake at 7am to get ready for school. Children are all different, and I'd just do what you think is right. If I'd known back then what I know now, I'd have tried to send him to school a year later (he was only just out of nappies before 4th birthday!), or I'd have tried to plan a September birth!

Hi hilly :) great help thanks everyone. I've made an appointment to talk to her teacher tomorrow after school so will report back how the initial chat goes before going to the HT. It's so reassuring to hear others have done it and it has helped. I now only with I had thought of this back in October!

I also agree that I'd take her out sometimes. I flexi-schooled my daughter for years and not only did she not suffer academically but she actually improved. Most HTs won't know much about flexi-schooling though (mine hadn't even heard of it) so you'll have to make sure that they know the details (yes it is legal, no they don't need the LEA's permission, no they don't have to provide schoolwork etc.)

I'masecret: rules on flexi-schooling sadly changed. No longer marked as educated off site which means absences count against total attendance figures for school. This doesn't make it appealling to head-teachers. Also funding rules changed: local authorities can now (as far as I remember) fund a part-time place (which is how they would view flexi schooling) part-time. Again, not very appealling to head-teachers. So although flexi-schooling is a legal option, it feels as if it's more or less by name only.
Pulling kids out under the age of five is fine as doesn't have any impact on funding or statistics (which are not reported to LEA until child turns five i.e. legal school age.

I took my 5yo out for one afternoon a week to do forest school.

Sent letter informing heasy. He never replied and months later didn't care when approached.

I thought flexi rules guidance was withdrawn again. Home ed boards will know.

"I thought flexi rules guidance was withdrawn again." No, DfE initially said that flexischooling was no longer allowed, and later backpedalled to say that is allowed but must be coded as absent rather than educated off site.

As tepidcuppa says, this provides a major disincentive for schools to allow it.

Flexi-schooling CAN still be coded as educated offsite, provided that certain criteria are now met.

Really? The March 2013 clarification from the DfE says "schools should not mark a pupil as attending school, using the attendance code B for off-site education activity, unless the school is responsible for supervising the off-site education, and can ensure the safety and the welfare of the pupil off-site."

And when asked in June 2013 what the DfE's policy on flexi-schooling was, Liz Truss' entire statement in response was "Flexi-schooling is a combination of attendance at school and home education. Schools may enter into flexi-schooling arrangements provided they correctly mark children as absent in attendance registers when they are being educated at home."

That seems clear to me. If there is a way round it, I'd be interested to know.

Saracen, the key there is the word unless. That was the criteria I was referring to. My school continued to mark DD as Code B because they agreed to be responsible for supervising her education (I kept them up to date with what we did and we sometimes did school work anyway).

OK, glad it worked out for you Twiglet!

We did this with summer born (late June) DD - just asked the HT (she's always around the school gates in the morning), I said DD was really worn out and she said Friday afternoon was the most sensible time to miss, so DH would take her out every Friday at 12. Really no big deal at all - was only in her office 5 mins and all was sorted. DD was happy, heaps of friends, well on track with phonics etc and the transition was fine when she went back to FT at Easter.

DS is actually even younger in his year (late August) but is much more dependent on routine than DD was, and is due to a speech disorder quite behind in some ways and sometimes misbehaves - so I wouldn't do the same for him because it would I think do more harm than good. Whereas with DD I had none of those worries. So totally depends on the child IMO

Well, DD teacher was a bit surprised at first but once what I was asking sunk in she was on board. In fact, the more we spoke the more she came round and started saying things like 'yes, your dd is particularly tired and gets very emotional when she is tired' and 'she throws herself into everything which is contributing towards her being tired' and she ended up agreeing it made sense for her to have Wednesday afternoons off, increasing this to Friday afternoons too if necessary. I now have an appointment with the HT on Tuesday to ask him but today the teacher told me she'd had a quick word already and thought it would be ok. I hope so, dd has done Monday, Wednesday and Thursday at school this week (Tuesday off due to an ear infection) and she is really tired today.

great news op

Brilliant news OP, I know lots of flexi home schoolers and part time alternative educators, seems to work well. FWIW, my September born DD was so shattered her reception autumn term that she was in bed at 6:30pm and started wetting the bed for the first time in 2 years from sleeping so deeply, it is tiring!

Really OP? Imagine the chaos in the class if every parent did that?

I didn't know parents were allowed to pick and choose when their children went to school/

We have had problems with a US family who think it's OK to take their kids off for Thanksgiving Day or to go to the cinema - whatever next?

Perhaps I'll say that I won't be in class on a Monday morning as I'd like to do my shopping when the shops were quieter.

Have you read the whole thread Babymummy or are you just chipping in at the end? How old are your dc?

I'm replying to the original post but as often happens on MN by the time I get around to getting on here, the thread has probably grown out of all proportion and bears no resemblance to the actual headline that attracted me in the first place

Lala

Fantastic result, I bet that's a weight off your shoulders. I hope your dd soon picks up and you enjoy your free time together.

You sound perfectly reasonable to me...my son is in reception and a few summer born children in his class were going at lunchtime some days with the teachers blessing. Better to be at school 80 per cent and cope than being shattered....

Scottish pupils must be more hardy cos this sort of thing has never gone on in any school I've ever worked in.