Father admitted to hospice abroad -- not permitted leave during term time

[eka]

Hello all,

My father has just been admitted to hospice, being given days or weeks to live. He's located in Germany. I've asked my daughter's primary school for a leave of absence during term time to go and see him and my family. Idea was to leave 5 days before the term time finishes so that we'd have more time over there. Guess what? Yup, I've not been granted permitted leave during term time, because the situation given is not an exceptional circumstance.

What?? Does my father die twice? Sorry, I'm obviously quite emotional about that. I do know that the headteacher will want me to go and fully understands, but that she can't give me the leave officially. And that's the part I don't understand. So my daughter's end of year report will state 5 days of unauthorised holidays?! It's not a holiday I'm going on -- we're not going to Disneyland, but rather the opposite.

Has anyone else experienced something similar? Or is it just my daughter's school that is that tight in giving a leave for exceptional circumstances? Would love to hear other stories.

Thanks. x

It's just ridiculous. It's not about saving money to go on a better holiday. It's (potentially) about having enough money to see a dying relative.

I would hope that most educators would have the cognitive flexibility to see that taking a holiday in term time to afford an extra day in Disneyland Paris is not the same as not having the money to fly last minute to a dying relative.

It's fundamentally about compassion and humanity. What many posters have pointed out is that the law
allows discretion on the part of the HT.

If I thought my father was going to die imminently I would want to go immediately, but if I hadn't the money I couldn't go. As a second-best I would be telling myself it would be better to have more time there as I would expect that I could offer support in arranging the funeral and sorting the estate. I would NOT be thinking yippee this is a lucky break, will shave some pennies off the cost of the regular flight home for Christmas.

It's just so arrogant to abuse a discretionary power like this or to be cats-bum mouthed about when someone should or shouldn't leave to see a dying parent and whether they are REALLY experiencing an emergency. I really can't see any justification for being anything but understanding and flexible .

No one was suggesting this.

That's what i think the OP needs to get across to the Head. The Head obviously thinks it's extending a holiday and there happens to be a sick relative to visit as part of the holiday The OP needs to get across that its:

• she would desperately like to go tomorrow, but can't afford flights and would need to take a long period off school to be able to manage to drive there, and back, and have long enough to both see her father and be able to manage the return journey.

• So instead, as very much a second best option, she'd like to leave school a bit early at the end of the term as this increases the chances of making it to her dad in time, but is the earliest she can manage to physically both do and afford the journey. Added to which, this will cause the shortest absence from school (because otherwise she'd have to take far more than five days as the journey alone is 6).

The fine becomes a grand if taken to court. They consider each case individually, they do not all automatically go to the court. The LEA have to be pretty damn sure they would win a case before they go down that route as obviously it costs them money to get you there.

In your case OP I would eat my hat if they decided to risk going down that route.

Also a teacher:

Just go. Believe me, you'd have the quiet backing of the teacher.