Reception DD is bored silly with school already

[whomovedmychocolate]

DD (5.3) has come home from her first week back really upset and saying she's fed up with school because the rest of the kids are so far behind her and they are just learning their letters and numbers.

I don't know what to do for the best; I was accelerated through school as was DH so I guess we sort of expect her to do well academically but we didn't think she'd get bored this early. She's at an excellent state school and we were thinking about moving her to the independent sector (if we can work out the finances) when she's eight or nine.

I can do extension work with her at home but actually, that's just alienating her at school because all her peers are just on such a radically different level. Should I talk to the teacher - I don't want to be an overbearing parent only ten weeks into the year but she's starting to lose the joy of going to school already :( And she was so happy about going to start with and so exciting about starting to learn formally. :(

do you think you would prefer her to be moved up to year one, whomoved? how close is she in age to that group? she does seem to be suffering from being one of the older ones, as well as bright.
(we sent dd to school in another language so there was no farking way she could be bored... [smug])

can i remind everyone who is posting here? this is WHOMOVED, not some ghastly PFB type. her kid is no doubt polite, jolly, sensible, cute, normal and gawjus, just like her mother.

I tend to agree with majority in saying, reception class is a lot more then just reading, it should be a hub of activity, lot's of playing, exploring and generally settling into the routines of school life.
They will be touching on all aspects and different subjects along in YR, physical education, bit's of geography, history science, art, music and so on, so I don't understand how can it be boring?
There is a lot more to well balanced education then only reading levels, and reception class is perfect environment for getting the taste for all exciting things they will start exploring from Y1.
It is great that your DD is already on the road to become competent reader, but try and engage her in different staff, exploring outdoors, art, sport, perhaps swimming just general staff, not formal "sit down learning", introducing her to musical instrument, but most importantly helping her socially, so that she enjoys these first all important years.
Going by what my DD says about school life it's lot of fun they have every day even in the Y1, she can't wait to go, she had a lovely time over christmas, but she missed her friends and her teachers, IMO that is a perfect base ground to build on, happiness and enjoyment.
I also would be reluctant to discuss with her reading levels or engage with her into lengthly conversations about her classmates and where are they at in reading, it's serves no purpose and it can be counterproductive, but I would be asking her questions about fun things she did or made, what she had for lunch, who's hand was she holding on the way to playground, and what games did she play with her friends, diverting from any formal/learning talk.

Thanks Aitch :)

She is an October baby so she's old for her year. I don't want her to move up. I just don't want her to lose that amazing thirst for knowledge. Which I did (eventually but it took a bit longer than 10 weeks ).

Is there a topic she's particularly interested in? My son's in reception too and is way ahead of the others in terms of academic work, he is also one of the oldest like your daughter. I was a very able child too and was sent up to the older classes in primary school, so deliberately left the academic work to school as I knew he would pick it up quickly and enjoy it more there than at home. As it turns out he absolutely loves school and I think it's because they really encourage them to do all kinds of different activities, and to enjoy learning different stories and topics as a class, and also to bring ideas into the classroom. For example he wanted to set up a dinosaur corner and so the teacher got him to write a list of the materials he'd need, to draw a plan etc, and then let him and his friends make a dinosaur corner. He is also forever making models and writing letters. Other children seem to draw prolifically. Or be staging plays and singing. They are learning about space this term, and he's very excited about that. Amongst all this they seem to also manage to give the children plenty of individual and group work for their level to progress their reading, writing and maths. They do whole class carpet time too for phonics etc, which my son grasps really quickly but he's been rewarded for encouraging his friends when they improve so it seems that peer to peer help is also encouraged which I think is great. I really can't fault his reception teachers and this is a 'good' state school in a very mixed city area, e.g 50% EAL. Perhaps a word with the teacher is a good idea, but remember that the focus of reception is still to learn through play, and that there is loads to learn and do besides just reading, writing and maths.

It is actually useful to learn how to deal with occasional boredom, frustration, (blunt scissors that don't do their job properly and several pens in a row that don't work very well any more), other peoples' disruptive behaviour (provided not extreme or continuous), having to compromise and become more flexible, other people having different priorities and interests, using your imagination to make your situation more entertaining, knowing when and how to tune in and out of what is going on without getting into trouble, getting your opinions heard without upsetting others, taking turns, waiting politely, making different kinds of friendships, dealing with disagreements, clearing up what you were doing when you are told to etc... A reception classroom is a great place for learning all of these things... provided the majority of the day is reasonably fun! And I seriously doubt, if the OP's dd has lots of friends, that most of the day isn't fun.

Yes, I'm certainly not in favour of children being bored all the time, and I've had my concerns too over the primary years, particularly about DS2, who's now in Y6 - but Reception, honestly, was not the problem. In Reception they have focused sessions of maybe 20 minutes at a time, but there's loads of scope to do your own thing - in fact, even more now that it is so child led and outdoor space a key part of the provision. So children can design a skyscraper out of bricks or write stories in or do maths investigations with objects or draw pictures or play in the sand pit or read in the book corner.....DS2, for example, spent a couple of weeks in the summer term sitting on a beanbag reading through all the books in the reading scheme boxes that he had 'missed out' because he could already read.

So I guess I'm not saying that your daughter is not bored, but that it's really worth investigating a lot more when and why she is bored. Is it during specific activities and what can be done to make it less boring? Are her expectations very fixed about what 'school' is?

Y1 was the difficult year for both of mine....Much more boring, IMO (lots more sitting down work and less scope for doing your own thing).

Tbh you sound like you would be better off home edding if you want to nurture a thirst for learning etc. School is not that interesting - not even private school! I love my dd's view of school - they never learn anything, it's just play play play, then she let's slip the odd numeracy lesson or writing. But dd very much likes playing - which is mostly what reception is (play based learning).

singersgirl i would echo that about y1,at least in reception dc have the option to move around and try and find something that interests them wheras in y1 they basically have to do what they are given.

Singers, I would absolutely agree with you about the Reception / Year 1 divide. In Reception, it wasn't a problem that DS could read fluently (he read to others in the reading corner, playing 'teachers'), that he could write but only at a large scale (plenty of whiteboards / blackboards / chalk on the outdoor area, and a teacher willing and able to spend time reading, transcribing or photographing that written work) ) and that he could add and subtract 3 digit numbers and negative numbers (he and another boy used to spend lots of time analysing the goal differences in that week's Premiership table or the World Cup groups, discussing how mny goals which team would need to score to get the same goal difference etc etc, and using small whiteboards or a blackboard set up outside to record their calculations). It was in Year 1 that his scope for progress was limited by a much more formal 'didactic' teaching style in which he was expected to 'do the same as everyone else' during a mapths lesson.

If i were the OP, I wouldn't be worrying about wanting MORE formal lessons at a higher level, i'd be wanting to make certian that my child had ample opportunity for open-ended explorarion and an understanding that that was what she was expected and encouraged to do - to push herself and not be limited by the 'direct teaching' she might receive (DD, in reception, would cheerfully sit and write stories for a whole session, aided and abetted by a teacher who had set up a lovely writing corner and had an inexhaustible supply of special paper and exciting writing implements - yes, the 'direct teaching' was 'how to write cat' but the opportunity was very much there to do MUCH more writing, and DD understood very well that it was her 'job' in school to do all the writing that she wanted to).

Ds2 prefers year 1 - not because of the work, but because the other children are older, wiser and better behaved.

I am sorry you are getting so much 'hastle' on this thread and can honestly say I know where you are coming from.

My dd like yours was one of the older ones (Sept.), when she started school she knew all her letter sounds and could read and spell simple three letter words - cat, bat, dog, pig, hat etc etc., however her reception class was chaotic (the head later admitted the children were 'rampaging'), lots of play (a per the EYFS), but she and a lot of the others, needed more structure. Like your dd, my dd, started to get frustrated (maybe bored isn't exactly what she means, but is trying to express she needs more structure or 'doing' stuff). My dd used to say she didn't like school and that she learnt much more at home etc. etc., I just dismissed it - she used to also 'worry' about the behaviour of the other children. The end result was my dd started to switch off and half way through reception, her keeness to learn disappeared, she literally changed, stopped putting her hand up (because she was never chosen) and started to daydream.

By Year 1, the whole class was behind, my dd couldn't read anymore than when she started school. None of them could sit quietly and listen. The excellent Yr1 teacher picked up on the reading and put her on a special scheme - because she was older and very articulate, the teacher couldn't understand why she hadn't progressed. Within a few weeks she was well ahead of what was expected at her age and there was no reason she hadn't started to read, other than she had literally 'zoned out'. Five other children were also put on the scheme, although didn't do as well as ours. I know all this because the head was very honest and open with me about the situation the year group had been in.

End of Year 1, dd was average, but very demotivated and uninterested in school, a different child to that which had started school, keen and eager to learn, as she had been a nursery. At the start of Yr2, we took the decision to move her early to a private school (we had planned this at Yr3, depending on how she was doing).

The difference is astounding, she is now so keen to learn, she wants to get the top in spellings, does her homework without a fuss. Literally can't wait to get to school. This is the child I had who started school, who in fact I had lost along the way. To be honest, I had forgotten how tenacious she used to be before she started school. All this has a knock on effect in other parts of her life - where she really tries much harder and concentrates so much more.

A long post, but the reason I wanted to tell you this, is that you have to go with your instinct, your are obviously worried, your dd is giving you indications that all is not what she was expecting - I only wish we had listened to our dd and went with our gut feelings, when she was in reception.

Take action now, sort it with the teacher and move her if you have to, our dd hasn't come to any harm in the long run, but the difference in her now as to part way through reception and Yr1 is so great, she must have been very unhappy, although she never expressed this as such and outwardly all appeared OK.

Best of luck, but please go with your gut feelings.

P.S, Our school does do different levels of work with the class, there are only 16, so they can easily do this and a lot of the homework will be structured to the individual child. I hadn't realised this when we started, but it is very impressive that they will work and be taken out to work at a higher or lower level and very reassuring.

very inspirational story KTK9,i'm really pleased things have worked out for you and your dd

I think it all goes to show you can't rely on other peoples' experiences to inform your own. It depends on your dd's school, the way they structure the reception classroom, her current teacher and her personality more than anything else. I strongly believe it has little to do with intelligence and more to do with personality. Some children like and need more structure than others and more formal learning, and do not need or want to "learn through play," because they have plenty of opportunities for playing outside of school with toys, games and people that they like more than those at school. That does NOT necessarily make them borderline autistic, lacking in basic social skills, lacking in initiative, or unimaginative pedants...

I do, however, think it is very true that many children describe school as boring when in fact they have been quite happy for the majority of the day; that they may describe the work as boring when the real problem is something else (including the work being too difficult - both my dss describe easy work as boring and work they are struggling with as boring, and quite often work that is at the right level as boring); and that if they have older siblings and friends, they may describe school as boring because they are not doing what their friends are doing and know they are capable of doing what their friends are doing, so feel let down that they can't do what their friends are doing even though if it weren't for the knowledge that their friends are doing something different, they wouldn't be unhappy about their own situation (thinking of ds2 here, who has always assumed he should be able to and allowed to do what ds1 is doing)... And when it comes down to it, some children like doing things they find easy but still enjoy doing, so will not object to sitting down once or twice a day to "learn" something they have known for the last 3 years, whereas others get unhappy and feel patronised by this, because they are so desperate to prove how clever they are and this doesn't give them the opportunity to do that (even if umpteen other times a day, they are given the opportunity).

I am a bit skeptical about the "whole week writing cat". My two (mixed y1 and yr class) spent "the whole week" writing about their Christmas presents. For ds2 that meant lots of pictures and writing his name. For ds1: not sure what he wrote but it was 4 pages and he now has the words "nuclear" and "consequently" in his spelling book. Differentiation can work just fine.

I worry about what your ds1 got for Christmas, TheAvocadoOfWisdom.

KTk9 - thank you - that is an interesting insight - glad it worked out for you :)

rabbitstew apparently lunchtimes are the best bit because she gets to run round with her friends. I see them when I drop off my youngest at nursery and they always seem to be hand in hand running madly about.

and can't she do that at other times? Most reception classes have free flow access to the outdoors

This one doesn't except a small space shared with nursery children and frankly the younger reception class seem to hog that because they do only spend 10 minute sessions because they don't like to sit for long (completely understandably).

I think she maybe is suffering from the 'I haven't learned everything I need to know in the first five minutes ergo it's rubbish' disease - DH apparently came home from school after the first day and couldn't understand why he had to go back the next day because he'd 'done' school - maybe it's genetic?

Is playtime best because your dd isn't interracting with her peers very well, though, whomovedmychocolate? You say she is best friends with a girl in year 1.... My ds2 was like this - liked playtimes best because he played with his db and friends in year 2, not with his peers. Therefore, the classroom, stuck with the other reception children, was "boring" - he would do a small amount of being silly with one or two of the other boys, a small amount of helping other children with their work, and a larger amount of time beetling off by himself, working on things on his own, or reading books. And, unlike his db, he did object to being taught things he could already do, largely because he was daydreaming of what he could be doing at home during that time, instead rather than making the best of where he was. No amount of giving him more challenging academic work helped, because that was just more time spent doing the work on his own or with a teaching assistant, not interracting with the others. Unfortunately, he was in a year that was girl heavy and he doesn't much like playing with girls (never understood why - his db was always quite happy playing with girls or boys), but the boys in his class were also mainly the younger ones and mostly entered the year below the national average in terms of speaking, listening and so on, so there wasn't much choice in terms of like-minded friends at that age - although a year is a long time in terms of children's development, so as I say, he is finding it easier this year.

And also, I know he was doing things he found fun. It's not as if he knew everything there was to know about any of the topics they did, and he definitely enjoyed the cooking they did as a class, and playing about with scissors and glue... but in comparison to what his db said he was doing, it really wasn't exciting or challenging enough for him!

Have you got to the bottom of whether she was actually only supposed to write "cat" in her book, or whether her sentence about a cat was an example of differentiated work?

wmmc - we are in the same boat with DD, who started Reception in Sept and, while she wouldn't describe herself as bored, is clearly detaching from school and losing the initial enthusiasm she had. Like your DD she can read well already, would love to be taught everything she possibly can and isn't on quite the same wavelength as a lot of her peer group.

I think it does matter if you don't have a peer group working at your level - it has made dd quite reluctant to reveal what she can do, and also demoralised her, because she could see that children were being praised for things she took for granted, but then she didn't get any recognition for the things she can do.

School should be giving her differentiated work which stretches her, but for us this has been a long slow process of badgering them repeatedly, and it isn't sorted by a long shot. So in the meantime, I wouldn't rule out the extension work at home - DD does workbooks at home and gets all of her playing out of her system at school. It's not how I'd choose to have it, but it works for now.

My attitude is probably a little defeatist,in our current situation which is similair to onesandwichshort's we are coming to the conclusion that dd's current school (we are looking at other schools) is going to provide the social side and home will provide the educational side,at least until we find a suitable alternative.

I agree with KT9. I spent my first year of school in a small private school, abroad, and was reading and writing to a very high level when we returned to the UK at the start of yr 1. I was put in the local primary school and was bored stupid and miserable for the next two years, I was so ahead of my peers and also, had such different interests to most of them. It had nothing to do with my social abilities, which are and were good, I was just a fish out of water.

When I was 8 my parents moved me into a small private school. I remember the incredible relief of being in a class whiere you sat at desks all day and learned instead of mucking about, as I saw it. I flourished from then on - both at school and out. Some children just are more academic than others and if your dd's schoolc can't cater for this, then you need to find somewhere that can - if you're lucky enough to be already considering private than move sooner rather than later.