Reception DD is bored silly with school already

[whomovedmychocolate]

DD (5.3) has come home from her first week back really upset and saying she's fed up with school because the rest of the kids are so far behind her and they are just learning their letters and numbers.

I don't know what to do for the best; I was accelerated through school as was DH so I guess we sort of expect her to do well academically but we didn't think she'd get bored this early. She's at an excellent state school and we were thinking about moving her to the independent sector (if we can work out the finances) when she's eight or nine.

I can do extension work with her at home but actually, that's just alienating her at school because all her peers are just on such a radically different level. Should I talk to the teacher - I don't want to be an overbearing parent only ten weeks into the year but she's starting to lose the joy of going to school already :( And she was so happy about going to start with and so exciting about starting to learn formally. :(

Indigo ds1 is not remotely Aspergers (I know because ds2 is) but he is charming ,urbane,sociable and intellectual (as opposed to academic) but he did struggle with reception and I agree it is important to learn how to relate to your peers but also not to feel that there is something wrong with being yourself.

I just get cross when people say it is impossibleto be bored in reception because actually it's not impossible but you do have to learn to cope with it.

"She wrote in her book 'Our cat is called Ziggy and he is very loud!'

I'm not being deliberately obtuse, honestly. But doesn't that mean that she is doing differentiated work? Others might be leaning to write "cat" , but she is writing sentences using the word cat. Isn't that OK?

Ds2(aspergers)is also charming and wonderful would hasten to add my point is that ds1 doesn't find it as difficult as ds2 to understand the world

OP, I'm having that same problem with DD. (Although we're in America, so she's in Kindergarten. And she's only there for 2 1/2 hours) It is very frustrating, as she keeps telling me she's bored, and has been telling the teacher, too. They've grouped them all off by their level for things like math, reading, etc, but DD is in a group by herself for each, which I think is contributing to the boredom. The teacher isn't helping any, because if DD decides she doesn't want to do something, then she is allowed to go do worksheets instead, which she now does all the time, and I can only shudder to think what she will be like next year.

I have a friend whose daughter was also bored in Reception. The school were happy to stretch her academically, but I think she was frustrated by the other children, as she did not enjoy playing, and found the games etc babyish.

My DS is in her class, and I personally found Reception fantastic. It led to a few interesting conversations between us, as I actually agreed with the school that playing was as much a skill as reading. She was adamant that her daughter had no imagination and did not play.

Sure enough, it all settled by Year 1. They are in Juniors now, and both in the top sets for literacy and maths - her daughter is still ahead academically, but has also settled to the more fun parts of school.

Of course, there are some children in the class that they find too babyish, but they have a group of friends who are happy to discuss history and politics with too.

I think it is a balance between keeping the school informed of your concerns, whilst encouraging your daughter to enjoy all aspects of school, and stretching sideways at home.

But surely in reception it's not the whole class sitting in rows all day being taught to write cat? In my experience small groups are doing focus work with the teacher or a TA, often in groups of similar ability and even within the group at least differentiated by outcome, often by other means. Meanwhile the other children are doing various play activities, self-directed, things like outdoor play, role play, construction, water play, sand tray, play dough, making collages... Different things every day.

If she's bored all of the time, then the school is probably not offering what they should be in terms of reception curriculum. One of my DSs couldn't read at all on starting reception and one could read pretty well. Neither were bored. They both found some parts of some days 'boring', though; DS1 found it hard to sit still, DS2 hated colouring. But DS2's teacher subtly differentiated for him where necessary (for example, asking targeted questions during carpet time) and allowed him to bring in books from home if he preferred.

Absolutely agree that if your daughter is not being restricted to writing the one word 'cat', then she's not being held back. And if they really have spent all week learning to write the word 'cat', the reception teachers need to go on a refresher course.

Reception is full of activities that most children will enjoy and learn from; imaginative play, art activities, science, reading, story time, music, PE.

'c' and 'a' form part of a handwriting target at our school. Maybe they were learning to form their letters correctly by using the word 'cat'? If a different group worked on this each day, then it WOULD take all week!

just writing cat in reception? can't she do something more suited to her standard - what about differenciation?

I would be looking at other schools

She isn't just writing cat in reception if you read what the OP said
She wrote about her cat describing it.

I don't understand why 'just' writing 'cat' in Reception is seen as wrong/too easy. Surely,a lot of children only start school in Reception???

My DD didn't do nursery,because we moved a lot and only settled when she was 5 in the UK,so started with Reception. She loved it and at the end it didn't look like she had only just started school. I wish all the classes are like Reception tbh.

I remember now that a parent told me how bored his daughter was. I now wonder if she thought she was more clever than everyone else. If you ask me,she needs more practice on social skills as her parent has now noticed as well. School isn't just about learning to read and write. Encourage them to make friends and treat people nicely and be proactive too.

It isn't wrong in reception but whatever work a child does should be matched to their capability. So if a child can already write cat they may be asked to draw a cat and write a caption or a more able child might be asked to write a sentence about the cat or even to write a short story about the cat.

In my DD's school there isn't much formal 'work' and that is how it should be. Most of the time it is free play, and the phonics is done at carpet time - it doesn't take long and from what I've seen (in my admitedly limited experience as a volunteer) even the really far-ahead kids were loving it. Those interactive whiteboards are bloody amazing :o the children are in ability groups now (not that they necessarily know it - DD just says "I go to miss C for phonics") - yr1/2 is mixed for these, is it possible for your DD to go to a higher class just for phonics sessions?

They do 'jobs' which are the teacher/TA/parent-led activities where one small group does it at a time (so while the TA might say "we've been doing CAT all week" it may mean one group per day) and that should not be boring either - eg with year 1 I do Numicon activities, one boy this week just instantly 'got it' so I encouraged him to go further while I continued supporting the others. The rest of the time is mostly play.

Sorry my post is not making sense I am streaming with cold

I agree that she is feeling let down in her expectations of formal work - I loved that kind of thing (I remember nicking my mum's old Reasoning workbooks ) but in reception it really didn't matter - I was allowed to sit out of reading lessons and read instead, and I just chose the more 'academic' of the available activities during free play.

Also remember that being able to write cat in Reception is not an indicator of what happens later. I know a lot of children who could not hold a pencil in in the first term of Reception, but were achieving level 3 in literacy by the end of Year 2.

seeker - I think she was meant to write cat and instead wrote a sentence. Which is fine obviously. And whoever wrote earlier about deprived areas. I know a deprived area doesn't mean less able kids, but in this case there are a lot of kids with social, emotional and academic challenges. Some of them have never held a book upon arriving :( Doesn't mean they can't start from where they are and thrive obviously but it does mean the teachers have to spend a lot of time focusing on those kids that need extra help.

And for the love of all that is chocolate covered it's not about socialisation - she has plenty of friends. She does treat people nicely.

Am logging off this thread now. Thank you for those of you who made productive suggestions. At least I'll now now to avoid talking to other parents about my concerns in future lest they think it's a criticism of their own kids. :(

I think the reason people ask 'why is she bored' or 'what about social skills' is because children say they are bored all the time,even at home. If a child is doing well I think they should be happy and proud. I was quite 'clever' in primary and was always keen to go in and show off. I wasn't bored. Come secondary,I was a complete dunce. That was when I got bored of school. The work was too hard for me.

If my dc tell me they are bored at home, I ask them what they think they can do. I have zero-tolerance for whinging though

I do, however, see what you mean about differentiation. Talk to her teacher or extend her at home.

I see your daughter is 5 yrs 3 mths in reception and to be ahead of the others at this age is not unusual. Please remember that some of her peers will be up to 11 mths younger than her and will quickly catch up. Your daughter will also probably have benefitted from around 2 terms extra of funded pre-school education than the summer born 4 yr olds in her class.

Ooops So sorry cross posted OP.

"seeker - I think she was meant to write cat and instead wrote a sentence"

Not being obtuse or anything, but are you sure? Because that's how differentiation works in Reception. Some do a squiggle. Some do a C. Some write Cat and some write Once upon a time there was a a cat called Orlando who went on holiday to the seaside. And some write The domestic cat, Latin name felix felix is a furred quadruped...

At least this is whwt happens in our school, where nearly 25% of children are on fSM and 20 have AEN. It's really the only way it can work in a massively diverse reception class.

I agree that would be the normal way of working in reception (and Y1)

Ds2 found his reception year a bit of a disappointment. It wasn't what he had expected - it was too much like pre-school and he'd already got bored with that and wanted to feel more "grown up" like his db. I think some children just don't like "learning through play" - they prefer either to play with their own toys and friends at home, or get on with formal, academic "learning" so that they can see the point of being taken away from their toys and friends at home. And if no-one in your class is at your academic level, but academic things interest you, then you are going to be isolated if you attempt to pursue any of your "academic" interests at school, because no-one else in the class is going to want to or be able to join in with it.

Ds2 is a lot happier in year 1 - I think he has adjusted his expectations of what school is about a bit, no longer has his db and older friends to play with in the playground (because db has moved up to KS2), so he has to make more effort with his peers and so is having to integrate better, and he is finding his peers more interesting, now, anyway, because everyone is a year older and therefore better able to concentrate and behave marginally more rationally!

My dd was similar to yours, starting reception on stage 5 books. She was reading level 7 by January. However she was still challenged and was not bored. There are so many other things children are learning at this time.

dd could write, too and was not the only one - I would be surprised if this was the case. dd's first school did put her up to year 1 for reading, but her second school didn't and I didn't find it affected her negatively at all. If you're concerned, have a chat with her teacher, book an appointment where you can discuss your concerns and you will probably find the teacher will reassure you.

My second dd starts reception in Sept and is currently reading stage 5 books. I am not worried in the slightest that she will be bored - but if she is, I will extend her at home and chat to her teacher about it. Dcs shouldn't be bored in reception, however bright they are, so do ask about differentiation if you are concerned.

i can recall being ahead of my peers and being moved p a year at primary school, i eventually got 4 as at A level 20 odd ears ago, in state sector. I was never actually bored at school, for all the reasons the posters have suggested above. School was great fun, friends, sport, drama etc, maybe just tryto encourage her to see school as more than jsut a place to carry out academic pusuits, but rather as a place to play, compete , build etc with her peers. She will soon come to recognise that whilst she may e ahead of her peers in some areas, she is not in all, e.g. drama or P.E. etc. This should elp her understnad her place in the greta scheme of things

What does she do outside of school? Maybe a tennis, tap, ballet or drama class would fill her need to learn new things. I think the learning in YR is so subtle it doesn't feel like learning--works really well for most kids (my dd grew up so much) but some need to feel like they are being taught something new every day.

Has she been led to believe that school learning is all about the three R's and that everything else is a waste of time? In that case, perhaps you could do a bit of explaining about different kinds of learning?