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Primary education

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Original poster

Teachers; how would you deal with 9 year old boy drawing boobs on a mermaid?

103 replies

DrNortherner · 07/12/2011 16:33

Ds's school have a red and yellow card system. Usually give 2 warnings, then a yellow, then a red. Teacher writes reason on the card, parent signs an sends it back to school.

Ds gutted he got a red card. Teacher wrote "ds defaced someone else's work"

I was as it sounds terrible. However, upon investigation it became clear that lunchtime play was stopped today due to bad weather, they stayed in the classroom watching a DVD and colouring in/doodling. A girl on ds's table was colouring a mermaid, ds drew boobs on the mermaid, teacher came in and saw the boobs and asked who did it. Ds admitted. She dished out the red card.

I feel a bit miffed that her description on the card leads you to believe he actually defaced someones hard work during a lesson, when in fact during unsupervised DVD watching he drew a pair of boobs on a mermaid. I think 'that's a bit rude' chat would have sufficed, or am I wrong?

I would appreciate opinions please.

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elfyrespect · 07/12/2011 18:03

I know it was during play and not work set by a teacher that's why I said "If my DD took the trouble to draw and colour a mermaid picture during unsupervised play (drawing it for herself, or for me etc - not as a part of classwork)....."

SoupDragon · 07/12/2011 18:08

Tell your son that drawing on someone else's work is wrong.
Sign the red card and send it back.
Forget about it and fight battles that are worth it.

QuickLookBusy · 07/12/2011 18:10

Well that's your opinion Mrs

The teacher obvioulsy felt differently and I agree with her. If my 9 year old spent time on something, whether it's advanced maths or carefully colouring in a picture, it should be valued by everyone.

2BoysTooLoud · 07/12/2011 18:13

Red card equivalents/ merit points etc are not just for 'work' time. Can be handed out in playtime etc. Possible to go straight to 'red' at our primary especially if feeling is child 'should know better'.
If my year 2 drew on someone elses drawing I wouldn't be surprised if he got 'red' card equivalent of our school. Wouldn't expect him to miss play time type punishment but would expect teacher to make him apologise.

Ihavewelliesbutitssunny · 07/12/2011 18:16

As others have said it is irrelevant whether or not the girl was offended and I don't think that you are going to achieve anything by texting the mum. He was wrong to draw on something that didn't belong to him. At nine he should have more self-control than that. You and he should accept the punishment and move on.

SolidGoldVampireBat · 07/12/2011 18:18

What's missing here is info as to whether the boy butted in on the girl's drawing and 'defaced' it, or whether the two DC were drawing together (as DC sometimes do) and the teacher has had a hissy over the fact that the mermaid had (OMG! Pass the lavender-scented hanky!) TITS! Because there are some officious little fuckers who think that any kind of depiciton of the Rude Bits of the human body is a sign that a child is possessed by demons/a tool of the patriarchy/being abused.

mrz · 07/12/2011 18:22

QuickLookBusy only if she valued it herself ... if the addition of boobs upset her then the teacher should have spoken to the OPs son and asked him to apologise to his friend if she wasn't bothered by the behaviour the teacher over reacted.

mrz · 07/12/2011 18:23

there is nothing in the OPs post to suggest it was more than two friends messing around in their lunch break.

4madboys · 07/12/2011 18:41

what solidgold said they could well have been sat drawing and chatting together. it wasnt work it was during play time and they could well have been helping each other with the drawings etc.

and as for the posts about 'gormless' boys etc, i am glad you arent teaching in my sons school, what a lovely way to talk about children he is 9 yrs old, lots of 9yr old boys are a bit immature and from the sounds of it he was playing with a friend, we have no idea if it was done mailciously or not and the school has a discipline sytem with structure which was totally ignored, not helpful for the children at all.

TheAvocadoOfWisdom · 07/12/2011 19:12

The teacher and parents may never know whether it was a harmless bit of fun or the boy being a nuisance. Either way, I don't see the point in challenging a punishment - it's not a permanent blot on his character, it'll be forgotten in a few days anyway. By challenging the teacher on this, you're just going to piss her off - you're challenging her authority.

I'm sure teachers make plenty of mistakes, as do we all, but children are also manipulative and untruthful when it comes to relaying their side of the story. Unless it's a real biggie, parents going back to school to challenge a child's punishment seems to be a bad idea: it's not the kids that are in charge and it shouldn't be them that call the shots, via their parents, if they don't like a punishment.

Hulababy · 07/12/2011 21:25

In my opinion it doesn't matter if it was school work or a colouring in picture the child did in their free time. It still should not be written on my someone else if they would rather they didn't. The fact that it isn't "work" isn't relevant imo.

ImNotaCelebrity · 07/12/2011 21:42

I would agree that it's an over-reaction, however I would support the school, tell my son off for his immature behaviour (which it is), sign the card and move on. I would not be making a fuss about it.

sashh · 08/12/2011 05:59

Er.................... how else would you describe it if not defacing? Would you have preferred "drew breasts on another child's colouring in"

He did something wrong, he is old enough to know that, he got the appropriate punishment.

MrsMagnolia · 08/12/2011 10:36

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster

DrNortherner · 08/12/2011 13:06

Spoke to the girls Mum last night, her dd was fine about it and teh 2 of them were sitting being silly drawing black teeth, glasses, a tail etc onto said mermaid. Ds drew the tits, the teacher took offense to this.

Interestingly whilst discussing it at work our 20 year old student from uni said boys in her lectures draw tits and willies all the time.......

OP posts:

daytoday · 08/12/2011 13:28

Drawing boobs on mermaid far better than drawing a penis.

That said, its all about the context isn't it. If you trust the teacher let it go - maybe the teacher was having a bad day with the class and they weren't listening - who knows?

How does your son feel about it? I tell my kids that sometimes I may disagree with a punishment but out of respect I would follow it - great example is the referee during a football game. Its tough, but adults get it wrong sometimes too - even teachers.

4madboys · 08/12/2011 13:44

so they WERE both drawing on the picture together and playing? in that case completely ott from the teacher, maybe she was having a bad day, but its still not ok.

HettyAmaretti · 08/12/2011 13:55

But, surely, if it was a mermaid (rather than a merman) it should have had breasts anyway? Possibly covered with shells or the like, but seriously, a mermaid without breasts is just wrong.

ChippingInNeedsSleep · 08/12/2011 14:06

What are you going to do?

I'd tear it into two, write on it that the children were drawing together. He admitted to drawing the breasts on the mermaid, but that as mermaids have breasts that was entirely acceptable and that she was completely over reacting, pop it into an envelope and send it back in.

Ihavewelliesbutitssunny · 08/12/2011 14:06

Is there any punishement attached to the red/yellow card. Or is it just the card in itself that is the punishment?

SolidGoldVampireBat · 08/12/2011 14:18

In that case there is a problem, because the teacher not only clearly has a hang up about body parts, but she's passing that hang up on to the DC by acting as though breasts are shameful and wicked.

Clawdy · 08/12/2011 16:46

What has she done that implies she has a hangup?? Most kids don't draw breasts on figures,whether it's a mermaid or their mum....

reallytired · 08/12/2011 16:54

I think its a bit of a non issue. The only punishment has been a card home and its clear tht you don't particularly care. A red card home is hardly the death penalty.

Has your son actually been punished or have you been informed he drawn a pair of boobes. Is he upset by the red card?

I think a lot depends on the circumstances. If the girl was doing a lovely drawing and your son defaced it then its a pretty mean thing to do.

AmberLeaf · 08/12/2011 16:54

Mermaids generally have breasts though!

I bet she wouldnt have told him off for drawing hands so why have an issue with him drawing breasts?

I agree with SoldGold,.

Dunrovin · 08/12/2011 16:55

If the NQT is dishing out cards a lot, then the currency of the card is taken down a little.

I would be really cross with my 9 yo DS if he did something 'silly' in a 'rude' sense like draw boobs on someone else's mermaid picture. If he drew a mermaid of his own, and included breasts, fine. But to deliberately draw breasts on someone else's work is being 'silly' and 'rude' about breasts (typical, yes, OK as school behaviour - no they need to learn not to do it).

Sign the card, send it back, tell him not to be silly with other people's pictures and support the school in helping him learn boundaries.

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