Do you resent your parents for not educating you privately?

[Ghoulwithadragontattoo]

Obviously I mean if they could afford to but decided against it?

No. HTH

We need a rolly eyed emoticon here!

I resent them for educating me privately at an all-female boarding school when I didn't want to be there and couldn't escape.
There are seriously crap private establishments out there, filled with arrogant bullies as pupils with narrow-minded bigots running them.
And lovely ones, with opportunities and imagination and wonderful staff.
Rather like state education.

No

OP, are you a Mallory Towers, St Clare's and Hogwarts fan?

God yes. I've held a grudge for the past 30 years and have made it clear to them that I will be choosing a very poor standard of nursing home for them in retaliation when the time comes. The bastards.

Errrrrrrrrrr. Nope.

But the they couldn't afford it, so i'll be off again.

Ta ra........

Lol bit harsh on ur parents op. I don't resent it there are great state schools out there now which are just as good as private schools. So I say no not at all!

I think probably the reverse is true. No-one from a private/paid for school was ever that 'cool' IME.

Maisie - not one without a ...... .......Spa?

No. What a strange question.

For the record I would be embarrassed to privately educate my children.

A spa?? A spa???

Ha, the nearest they'll get to a spa is the very occasional bed bath with cold water if they're lucky. I tell you, I'm bitter about my lack of private primary education.

Nope. My view of education is too broad for a private education actually to qualify.

No. I don't even resent them for sending me to the shit hole of a school which was close to home rather then look for one that was a bit better.

I should explain I am looking at this from the other side if you like. I am planning on sending my children to our (v good) local state school but we could afford to send them privately. Many of our friends are going down the private route and there seems to be a feeling of if you don't you're not doing the best for your children. Hence I'm asking whether anyone actually looks back and resents their parents for sending them to a state school.

For the record DH both went to fairly average state schools but did well academically so don't subscribe to this view.

I resent my parents for condemning my DBs to years of sexual abuse in boarding schools which has damaged them irreparably as adults. They've never accepted any responsibility and still refuse to believe anything happened at all. As far as they were concerned they were doing the best thing for their children.

Luckily for me, girls don't need an expensive education as we can just marry money instead

I should explain I am looking at this from the other side if you like. I am planning on sending my children to our (v good) local state school but we could afford to send them privately. Many of our friends are going down the private route and there seems to be a feeling of if you don't you're not doing the best for your children. Hence I'm asking whether anyone actually looks back and resents their parents for sending them to a state school.

For the record DH both went to fairly average state schools but did well academically so don't subscribe to this view.

Sorry for double post there!

don't send them to boarding school, they will end up speaking with that godawful accent

I thank mine every day for making huge sacrifices to send us to excellent independent schools. We flourished in an environment that was hard to find in the state sector where we lived. Independent schools can attract superb, experienced staff and often have outstanding facilities. Not to mention that they have the advantage of removing disruptive pupils who harm the learning of others.

Having started at a (good) state school, the difference was immediately noticeable from the moment I first walked in (to an independent). Just as with state schools, there are good and not so good independent schools.

I fully intend to make the same sacrifices to ensure that my children get the best possible education. Speaking from experience and as an educator, the gulf between state and independent at primary level is enormous.

Independent education does not usually mean "rich people" and "snobs", these cliches are simply stereotypes. In the same vein, state education should not be stereotyped either.

I'd say that if things go pear-shaped/their lives don't pan out, your children may end up resenting you whichever path you take if they are that kind of people

a friend of ours who went to a very expensive public school disliked it and resented it so much he became a drop-out

There are more important things in life to worry about. I would resent my parents if they didn't love me or abused me in some way but not because they didn't educate me privately.

No, if you have an excellent state school then your child will thrive and will not lose out in any way, shape or form. The idea that private always = better is simply not true.

God, no.

Quite the opposite, actually.

Nope, not remotely. They could have afforded it, I'm very glad they didn't. With hindsight, I'm even glad they didn't send me to the very high achieving but rather superficial and focused only on the bright kids state secondary school which most of my then friends went on to, but to the slightly less high achieving but in retrospect better for me school. And I have a 1st from Oxford so I don't think it did me any harm (not that I think this makes me a great person but I'm guessing the people who think you're only doing the best for your kids if you send them private probably regard that as some measure of success)