Girls wearing shorts under school dresses

[eandemum]

When DD (5) started wearing her summer school uniform (the usual- checked summer dress) I got her shorts to wear. Not Bobby Charlton style really baggy ones, more like black cycling shorts in T-shirt material - we call them "modesty shorts"!!

Anyway, DD comes home on Thursday with a note re: this (all got this note not just her) - saying such shorts were not part of the uniform and shouldn't be worn (leggings were ok in certain cases).

She doesn't wear them for religious reasons - just 'preserving her dignity' - we have practised sitting in a ladylike fashion but I know this goes out the window once she is in school.

I wrote back suggesting a compromise; white shorts that don't come below the hemline (her black shorts would be at the hemline) so can't be seen.

What do you think?

[jo164]

I also work in a prep school where they wear gingham dresses. The girls tend to put on their shorts under their dress at lunchtime so they can play without feeling exposed! We have climbing frames which they seem to like hanging upside down from so personally I think its a good idea. I only have little ones, but even at 2 and 4 I don't like them displaying their knickers in public. No harm in maintaining a little modesty!!

[seeker]

Why does the word "modest" make me cringe?

[LIZS]

Agree Seeker. I do find this somewhat at odds with the "let girls be girls" philosophy, taking it towards extremes which are just as discomforting.

[eandemum]

(As original poster) Have been reading through all the posts (been away)
and it seems;

a) need to do the OBVIOUS and got decent fitting pants/trunk types, check fitting regularly (and once the elastic goes they get CHUCKED OUT not left at the bottom of the wardrobe as happens now!)

b) I am not bothered that pants can be on show (cartwheels etc) but the fact that sometimes, as others have pointed out, sitting at carpet time etc MORE can be on show - was in school recently and saw this.

In 10 years time I am going to look back at this thread fondly after having an argument re: 15 year old DD over her school skirt being too short!!

c) p.s agree over the word 'modesty' but couldn't think of another way to describe them

d) also agree with 'heat' issue ie cycling shorts would be too hot.

May be it was because we have been told NOT to use them that this has become an "issue"??
But agree, as said before, don't want to overthink this!!

Actually I originally wanted to post a Q re: reading levels but I know how that goes down!!

[LawrieMarlow]

Go on, ask about reading levels as well - you know you want to really

[Dorje]

For my DD we put her in her uniform and then under that she chooses to wear shorts/ cycling shorts / cropped leggings.

She's out a lot in public parks with her school for break times, with gymnastics / circletime. It seems to be the norm to wear cropped leggings or shorts. I wouldn't want her to not be able to be active, because some would see her knickers and make comments.

Don't see an issue with it. Some muslim girls in her school are totally covered leg / arm wise, and when they are 9 they will wear veils as well..

If leggings under her uniform let my girl be a girl without attracting the nasty comments / attention of others over whom I have no control, then I'm all in favour of her wearing what she feels most comfortable in.

[bearwithspecs]

My dd hates wearing her dresses as the boys laugh at seeing the girls knickers. She is 4. I have some white cycling shorts which I offered her but she refused. She wears girls grey school shorts instead and culottes or trousers in winter

[hellymelly]

Haven't read the whole thread, but I don't like this American "modesty" trend. They are little girls! We did handstands, climbed trees, forward rolled down hills etc in Summer dresses in the late 60s through to mid 70s when I was at Primary school. I don't recall anyone worrying about gaping pants. Small boys would occasionally say "I can see your knickers" in a ne ne ne ne ne sort of way, but this was the era of us singing "Oooh ah I lost my bra, I left my knickers in my boyfriend's car" while skipping. My dds still strip naked to change on the beach, they are 7 and 9. The smaller one runs around in her pants everywhere we go in the Summer, as she likes to strip off. They are small children. They don't need thick all covering pants. (We were forced to wear them in secondary school though, and there would be a knicker check. We had stopped random handstands by then!)

[ReadyisKnitting]

Navy cycling shorts, 2 pack in asda from £2.50.

Dd1 decided she needed because her friend was wearing her sisters old outgrown ones. She's yr 3.

Dd2 is copying her sister! She's not the only one, as she also has friends copying big sisters. She's yr1.

Makes sense for dd1, who spends s lot of time upside down! Given the state of dd2's pants some days it may be a positive yet. While I'm not going to push them, I can remember being the only one in a group of friends that didn't yet have xyz while they had had for some time. Not a nice feeling, and I don't want dd1 to experience it.

[OwlCapone]

This is a zombie thread bumped by a spammer.

[hellskitty]

At My DD's school they have a climbing frame with bars as they call them that they all hang upside down by their knees from as well as the usual cartwheels and handstands so we are not talking about glimpses of pants...Knickers are not shameful but neither are they supposed to be on display.AS far as I know all the girls wear little cotton cycling-style shorts under their dress because they want to..Unless the school has an underwear policy, I don't see what business it is of theirs.

[Sarahplane]

I don't see why it's necessary or what the point is just get your dd pants that fit. On the other hand I can't see what businesses it is of the schools. Haven't they got more important things to worry about than what girls wear under their dresses?

[zingally]

My Year 1 girls are ALWAYS flashing their knickers this time of year, and I've also thought that the dresses seem particularly short this year.

With this age group, I can jokingly say "stop showing me your knickers!" but I wouldn't do that with a KS2 class.

I think short leggings under summer dresses are very sensible. My current school wouldn't bat an eye at that. A lot of the muslim girls in school do that already.

[catkind]

OK, if we're un-zombie-ing this thread, here's my take:

1. If they're not visible under the dress then they're underwear, none of the school's business.
   
2. If they scramble around like at our school I think they'd be more comfy with shorts not just pants. They're climbing things, scooting around the floor on their bums, going down slides. I wouldn't want to do that lot in just a dress. And I certainly wouldn't want 5 yr olds restricted in what they can do because of their clothing.
   
3. I assume school is trying to establish itself as a formal setting with all this uniform malarkey. So yes I don't think showing pants is appropriate. Just like it wouldn't be appropriate to meet the bank managed in your bikini, even though a bikini is in no way improper or offensive. If school don't care about formality and are happy to let 5 yr olds be 5 yr olds then ditch the daft dresses and let them wear comfy shorts and t-shirts.

[babasheep]

My dd wear boxer type underpants.

[Lesshastemorespeed]

Dd wears cycling shorts to school under her school dress for handstand/cartwheel purposes. She is 10, and the boys get all giggly if they see knickers. I am quite at the school for not letting the girls wear proper shorts in the summer but luckily they don't object to this.

[Ericaequites]

Bring back knickers for under dresses. Forbid thongs for school wear. I've seen girls wear these in senior school, at it's very unattractive.

[MrsCakesPremonition]

Given that girls already have the option to wear shorts, culottes and trousers as well as dresses and skirts, it seems peculiar to choose to put them in dress+shorts. It actually seems to be drawing attention to the whole "modesty" and "oh no someone might see my knickers" thing. If your DD likes doing cartwheels or sitting legs akimbo, then just put her in shorts or trousers.

[RiversideMum]

I had a child put in "modesty shorts" last year. She could never get them down properly to go to the loo and was always wetting herself.