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Preteens

Parenting a preteen can be a minefield. Find support here.

Puberty and Self Esteem

3 replies

Bluetrix · 28/05/2023 20:48

Hello, this is my first ever post but I could really do with some advice/reassurance.

DD is 11 and this year puberty has hit hard! Boobs popped out of nowhere and she immediately went into a B cup bra. Soon after her periods started (she only turned 11 in Feb and started very shortly after). Hairy legs, armpits...all the puberty happening all at once!

DD has always been a bit introverted but is still confident and we have a good relationship - she's a bright kid, does well in school and is popular. However, since puberty hit, its clear her self esteem and confidence is taking a knock. I've seen notes left on a notebook about her wanting to remove body hair for example (I have no problem with this at all - I know she will think it's so cringe me talking to her about it but I will 100% be giving her a shaving kit and showing her how to use it if this is what she wants). She is quieter lately and even in the heat (and she really does feel hot all the time) she will cover up with coats etc as much as she can.

Some positives is even through this she goes to scouts, performing arts and even sea swims with me regularly which I hope all builds her resilience.

She is about to start secondary school on top of all of this. I was wondering if anyone has tips or has lived through the puberty stages and knows how to help her through it? Is there anything you found worked? I try to have lots of open conversations about how she is feeling but she is definitely quite guarded with some of this stuff.

Thanks for reading!

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HannahHere · 28/05/2023 22:20

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SiouxsieSiouxStiletto · 30/05/2023 18:21

Is she particularly dark haired? I'm so dark that I resemble a small gorilla of I don't shave at least my lower legs.

Does she have any SM and do you think that this might be okaying a part in her ideas of how she should look?

Bluetrix · 30/05/2023 22:52

Thanks for the replies

No social media but she does watch youtubers so potentially some pressure from that I guess? She has red hair, the hair on her legs is pretty fair to be honest but under her arms in darker.

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