Why are girls so awful

[Lushmetender]

Why is it girls change around age 9? My first dd had a couple of friends but then they all dumped her at around age 9 and ddoesnt have any friends at school. Teacher put her on a trust thing where they meet other girls with difficulties where she’s met a few girls but they’re all a bit odd frankly. Now my other dd best friend has started being really horrible, ripping up her drawings, not wanting to partner with her and has not invited her to her party! What is it with girls???

“They’re all a bit odd, frankly”

Well, girls get it from somewhere, usually parents…..

Why not ask for advice on the problem without making ridiculous sweeping statements.

If you are worried about your DD socially - have you tried having a meeting with the class teacher to ask if your DD is viewed as a good friend and maybe to find out what is going on?

Beyond this I would advise getting her to go to clubs etc. Lots of young children struggle with friendships, it can all be a bit intense at times.

@Saucery

“They’re all a bit odd, frankly”

Well, girls get it from somewhere, usually parents…..

they’re all a bit odd frankly.

Maybe that’s why the teacher has matched your Dd with them…

Yeah agree with PP... they get it from somewhere and "They're all a bit odd, frankly" isn't a nice thing to say.

There's also maybe a reason your DD was paired with the "odd" ones...

I'm sorry that your dd is having such a hard time, OP. Maybe you should encourage her to keep an open mind about the children in the trust group? Even if some of them are a bit odd, they might also be very kind and caring friends?

I do take issue with your suggestion that all girls are awful. Lots of girls are actually very kind, and I'm sure that there are some pretty awful boys out there too. Let's not stereotype.

I hope that your dd finds some nice new friends very soon.

Also it might be good to help your DD to consider both boys and girls as potential friends. All my children had both boy and girl friends right through school, it increases your options.

Your thread title is not nice.

You're getting a hard time hear, some girls do get a bit tricky at this age (up to about 15) and can have a negative impact on friendships.
Does your DD do anything out of school with girls from other schools? My dD gets on okay at school but has a couple of great friends from her swimming club.
As a teacher, unless it's outright bullying try not to get too involved - they do often work things out.

Well trying to force friendships with the group is a bizarre approach. They are all " odd" so they can be "odd" together? WhaT a horrible idea . Children should be given boundaries and taught appropriate behaviour . Doesn't sound like behaviour is being managed at all in this class. Oarebts need to be spoken to by the sound of it. I've always told my children they don't have to be friends with everyone akd any one but they do have learn to be civil and polite and to work/play along side others. That bullying is not acceptable.

Parents

Sorry for typos

I’m interested in what OP considers odd tbh…

Bit sexist

Wow! The the competitive AIBU sport of ‘who can be the most vile to the OP’ is strong in this thread

@Lipsandlashes but your fine with the generalisation of girls and calling children odd? Give over ffs

Are you sure your DD isn’t your issue? You’re saying these other girls are odd, but maybe others think the same about your daughter. You can’t force them to be friends with her.

Girls in general don't particularly 'change around age 9' and certainly are not all awful.

Your DDs seem to be unlucky in their friendships. Can you get them into activities out of school where they'll meet other people with shared interests?

Girls do change at this age. They become more socially aware and bitchy imo. I was shocked by some of the attitude/responses from my daughter at this age. I talked to her about her responses as they arose and that helped. I think hormones beginning has a lot to answer for and the start of the transition from being a little cute Kid into a teenager. Lumping the odd balls together won’t help her though and is very patronising to the kids!

@MrsRobbieHart

they’re all a bit odd frankly.

Maybe that’s why the teacher has matched your Dd with them…

Oh dear... OP, you can't call other people's children odd and be upset about your daughter being left out 🤷🏻‍♀️

My dd is 9 and lovely. Maybe the apple didn't fall far from the tree

My DD plays with girls at school but plays online with boys from her class at home. This works well and her class teacher says she is popular and gets along with everyone.

I do think that age can be known for friendship upsets - they're all growing up and changing and sometimes that means friendship groups splitting and new ones re-forming. Our school were excellent when there were a few bumpy months that year, and tbh I raised an eyebrow at their proposed solutions but I was totally wrong and their ideas worked really well.

How about giving your DDs more opportunities to develop their friendship skills outside school (Brownies / Scouts / Sports teams etc) and also having another chat with the teacher to see what they think? I'm sorry both your DDs have had a difficult time. I hope things improve soon.

@Saucery

“They’re all a bit odd, frankly”

Well, girls get it from somewhere, usually parents…..

Quite..