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Preteens

Parenting a preteen can be a minefield. Find support here.

Girlfriends / boyfriends help

4 replies

ThrilledToTiddlyBits · 08/01/2020 19:50

So my 11 year old son (year 6) is currently laying in bed whatsapping a girl in his class. He's had a crush on her for a while and they've known each other years. All fine and dandy, they're just friends atm but he keeps me updated on other friends that have become GF / BF and do spend time together outside of school.

When I was his age boys weren't on my radar at all. Year 8 or 9 was when I started to fancy lads, and my friends might have BFs and GFs. Before that age we'd barely talk to each other face to face, let alone be messaging and be actually meeting up at weekends!

So, if this progresses, what do I do? Do I encourage her to come here or him to go to her house, do I need to have a chat with her parents (who I've never met), or do I stay hands off until he asks me something specific?

They're 11 FFS, it's madness I have to wonder about what they might get up to.

Side note, yes I will be monitoring his messages as I do all his online activity.

OP posts:
Seashells47 · 09/01/2020 10:32

I agree it seems pretty early but kids are so grown up nowadays so I can’t say I’m surprised. Chances are nothing serious will come of it this early but you can still do your best to show interest, ask ds if he wants to invite her over for dinner one night after school. That will also introduce you to the parents.

mcmen05 · 09/01/2020 15:21

Y6 and 11 doesn't sound right
Y8 are normally 11-12 where I live. and there would be bf/gf in y8 and texting on snapchat.
Some may never come to anything only texting
No need to involve parents or invites to house.
My 2 dd go out with boys and I never meet them leave them to it but if they want to meet outside school tell him to organise as a group.

ThrilledToTiddlyBits · 09/01/2020 19:17

He's defo 11 and defo Yr 6!

Primary school here is age 4 to 11 (Yr R to Yr 6) with secondary 11 to 16 (Yr 7 to Yr 11).

OP posts:
Missarad · 18/01/2020 21:40

Get him doing scouts x

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