Reported to social services!!

[rabbitrabbit12]

I confiscated DDs phone last night after she came back from her dad's because she was acting weird and was very distant. She wasn't very talkative this morning so we had a bit of a row, then this morning I had a call off SS reported from the school with my daughter saying I've smacked her legs!!!! I never touched her! She told them I had been drinking - I had one glass of wine with dinner. I'm so shocked, they now want to investigate me?!?

Well you can't confiscate her phone because it's her phone.

she's 12...

Agree with BlueSky - she's very unlikely to have been able to put together a credible story.

I can tell you, if she was my daughter she would never see that phone again.

THIS!

NotSuchASmugMarriedNow1 I also have a 12 year old DD who has recently been allowed an Apple SE phone, she knows that if she misbehaves it gets taken away.
I CAN, AND I ALEADY HAVE DONE!
I would not leave her without a phone, if she misbehaves she has to use an 'old fashioned' phone. Much like the one I have

No wonder there are so many out of control teens around
All teenagers do this when they're annoyed... (ring Social Services) You can't take her phone (from a 12 year old), it's her property
What utter bollocks.

incywincybitofa "Have you spoken to her dad?"

Read the OP's post @ 13:34:44

She feels rejected by her dad
She's a bit wierd and distant
You take her phone
She calls social services
You get a load of people piling in saying she should never see her phone again.

And so it escalates. For your own good OP, take a step back here.

I have never known a child call SS like you're claiming NotSuchASmugMarriedNow1, how old are your child/children and how many times have they done this?

What a load of shit and yes you can fully well take a mobile phone that you bought and paid for off a 12 year old

Christ alive

OP,like some PP's have mentioned,they will have things in place that will come out that she's lying so don't worry

I have been in your shoes. SS took about three weeks to contact us. Police was never involved. SW didn’t even check the kids bedrooms ( standard check to ensure you give basic care to the kids). Case was closed very quickly however it’s all on recordif your asked if you have ever been involved with SS. We was then referrred onto early support.

If I’m honest sometimes I think if my ds pulls this kind of stunt again they should take him on his word and remove him from my home. It scared the life out of siblings and he didn’t care less. He just revoked his statement but months later I’m still struggling to see the lighter side of it.

for parents who have been through this. It sounds horrendous. I know they are children and don't really understand the full impact of what they are doing, but it's still an appalling thing to do.

You know your dd best. Was this a cry for attention or a vindictive act. She has to face the consequences now. It may bring het closer so she can discuss her feelings about her dad. My dd had a friend who staged an abduction at this age. Rang friends who were in school (she was late) screaming ‘let me go’. Police etc called by school. Turns out she was angry friends had got on bus without her even though she was LATE. She never did it again.

Did i slip into a parallel universe or something?

You cant take a phone of a child at bedtime? Hysterical.

I have taken phones, xboxes and pc cables off my teen when he has been an argumentative and stroppy pia and will continue to do so. My house my rules. If he wants privileges he can act in a reasonable manner if not tough shit.

Wtaf is going on these days?

My 16 year has just done something in a similar vein. She was in hospital recently and told the nurse I had done all sorts of stuff to her, which I hadn't. SS was informed but never got involved. Luckily they could see she was venting.
She was horrified when she realised what she had accused me off had been written down for me to see.

NotSuchASmugMarriedNow1
All you can do is not pay for it. You can't actually take it.

I can and I do! Along with Playstations, X Boxes, TV etc etc

Another SW, previously child protection, agree that while this doesn't happen a lot, it does happen. Sometimes when the relationship between parent and DC isn't great for some reason. It is going to be stressful for you in the short time but isn't going to go anywhere in the long term. It is fine to take your DC's phone off them if they aren't sticking to the rules, if they are misusing them then it is responsible parenting to step in and reinforce them. Social workers are used to being lied to and should be able to sort out what has happened.

My strapping 15 yo had his phone removed for 1 month once I collected it from the school. They confiscated it for use in an unauthorised zone and I left it there until I had time to pick it up. I am very busy so it took a while and then I kept it for another 2 weeks. Them’s the rules.

I fondly remember the time we all cheered the mother who threw her son's X Box out of the window when he was spectacularly rude to her while playing.

How weird.

Ringing SS is not normal behaviour and I'd be bloody furious and a bit worried

Of course you can take her phone.

Well you can't confiscate her phone because it's her phone

I'm with Judge Judy, I own the air you breathe, especially at 12!

I'd be fuming. It's like the boy who cried wolf, what happens if something genuine happened?

Kids nowadays don't know they are born. I'd be keeping hold of her phone until it sinks in how wrong this is.

Ds1 once phoned the police when he was about three because I wouldn't give him and ice cream.

I would also have a serious chat about the VPN and see if you can have a conversation about why that was on there and what she has been looking at. Clear boundaries are great but good conversation also is very useful with stroppy teens. Good luck.

Jesus. That child wouldn't know what happened.

She thinks she's been abused?!

I'd come down on her like a tonne of bricks pulling a stunt like that. Want to play the dogs bollocks and try to get your mother put in prison?! Deal with the consequences.

I'd also get some info regarding failed accusations and how people have been arrested for them.
Nothing to serious but enough to put the fear of God into her.

If a child says the were slapped to a teacher they must pass it on to CPO.
But surely the CPO is a teacher within school who can see this is rubbish?

(My DS, who is in Y1, and has SEN, was stabbing me with a pencil because he didn't want to do his homework. I grabbed it off him not very gently at all I'm afraid, not one of my prouder moments and managed to scrape his arm and leave a mark. He told school I'd stabbed him, school rang me, I told them what had happened, they know both him and me and said "sorry we had to ring you". End of the matter except I imagine it's on a written record somewhere).

"will likely give her a talking to if she continues to make false allegations. "

I would hope that she gets a talking to this time.

I'd be so disappointed if a kid of mine made up such lies.