Different bedtimes for different ages?

[AvocadoGirl]

Hi all,

I've 3 kids (boy 12, girl 11 and girl 9). At the moment, they all go to bed around 8:30 with devices off at 7:30.

Is this reasonable? Or should I go a bit later for the older two kids? When do your kids of these ages go to bed?

Dd 13 in bed for 9.30, can read for 30 mins
DS 10 in bed for 9pm, can read for 30 mins too

My 11 year old daughter goes to bed between 8 to 8:30 and my 13 year old 9:30

I think your 9 year old should go to bed an hour earlier 7:30 - 8pm

My 14yr old is normally in bed by 9pm and reads for half an hour, a proper book not on a screen.

12 year old - bed for 9/9.15
10 year old - bed for 8.30.

Timings often slip though!

But if yours have always gone to bed at the same time and it works, why change it.

We put all screens away by 8 and after that it's reading for DC2, chatting and then reading for DC1. Reading can be on a kindle.

9 year old goes up at 8, but often isn't asleep until 9.

12 year old goes up at 9.30 but often isn't asleep until after 10.

DS10 goes to bed at 830.(ish) but will listen to audible for 30 mins. Devices off at 7 but we will watch TV together for an hour. If he's late to bed he will have some 'plinky plonky' music (no audible). He's up at 730 for school and generally chipper most mornings.

DD age 12 goes up 8ish, lights out 9ish. Needs to wake for school 7:30am. Waking up time is relevant as it is sleep they need so if you need them to wake earlier they need to go to bed earlier.

My dd (13) goes to bed at 9pm

Ds (15) at 10pm.

I have always staggered their bedtimes, even when they were little. I remember when they were 11 and 13 and it was usually dd at 8.30pm and 9pm for ds.

Those bed times are lights out time. Neither of them really shut themselves away in their bedrooms (yet). DD usually reads downstairs from 8pm and ds usually watches tv film til about 9pm and then reads for half an hour in bed.

No mobiles / devices in their rooms overnight. No access to them after 7.30pm.

It honestly depends what time your day starts and how easily your child gets out of bed.

Ds1 is 13, lights out at 9pm but he gets himself out of bed at 6.45 comes into my bed then gets in the shower without being prompted at 6.50.

Ds2 is 10, lights out 8.30pm he is woken by me at 7am, comes into my bed and snuggles under the cover until his brother is dressed and ready to go down to eat breakfast.

They both read in bed before sleep, Ds1 for longer than Ds2.

I think you should stagger their bedtime, even if only a little bit because the need a lot of sleep.

I had a brother 3.5 years younger, and my parents thought they were being "fair" by doing everything the same, when as the oldest it was highly frustrating that he had the same bedtime as me, we both had the same amount of freedom, we got a laptop at the same time (17 and 13)....

Not suggesting you are at all like this, but I'd stagger bedtime so 8.15, 8.45 and 9.

We go DS2 (7) in bed at 7:30, he doesn't like to read or anything so straight to sleep. DD (9) up at 8, usually reads for 20 minutes. DS1 (14) up at 9:30, lights off at 10. They all get up at 7 on a school morning.

Mine are quite far apart in age, so have always had different bedtimes.

DS1 13 goes around 9.30-10.00
DS2 9 goes around 8.00-8.30
DD 5 goes 7.00pm on the dot or is cranky as hell.

DD1 12.5 aim for 9 but usually closer to 930 once face/hair attended to. Accept when she's 13 may be 930.
DD2 just 8 - still 8. She's pretty good about it but often doesn't get to sleep till 830 or so.
All pretty similar i think.

Staggering bedtime is all well and good unless your eldest needs to be up earlier than the younger ones due to a separate and longer journey to school / earlier school start time/ activities before school (or all 3... )

Mine all go to bed at the same time - my youngest actually seems to sleep least although he "should" need more sleep, and older 2 need more sleep but also have to be up earlier. My middle one is asleep as soon as his head hits the pillow and needs waking in the morning, youngest and eldest listen to audio books / read and get themselves out of bed without needing to be woken (but eldest does use an alarm clock and moans and mutters to herself grumpily a bit about getting up).

They are 12, 9 and nearly 6 and all go at 7:30pm but eldest gets up at 5:45, dc2 at 6am, dc3 at 6:30-7 depending who is taking him in the morning.

I guess I unintentionally stagger their getting up times :o They wouldn't cope on less sleep and dc2 only gets in from sport in time for a bowl of porridge, shower, PJs and into bed 3 times per week so can't go earlier.

Little ones (6,5,5) = about 7:30ish (they are 15 months apart and then twins and share a room)
10 yo = about 8:30ish
14 yo = about 10ish
16 yo = should be about 10:30 but always ends up later

14 + 16yo get up 6:30, the rest at 7

And all can go 30min later on weekends if we have nothing the next morning

These always end up slipping though!