over weight 12 yr old

[Moonmum28]

I feel like I am abusing my son by making him exercise he cries and screams. If i mention that he is over weight he cry's and tells me i am being mean to him.
he is 10st 3lbs and he is 12.
He doesn't get any exercise we live him the sticks with no access to parks , he does have any friends that he can go out and play with around their area so he just stays in and play xbox sitting n his bed.
i am worried about his health now and the fact i have to buy him a size m males clothing is not good.
has anyone else had this problem ?
we have made him do 20 sit ups a day so far and a 10 min workout video today and have told him we will be increasing it weekly.

You need to find him something he enjoys, something he can really get into. You need to find him a team sport or other activity, not just force him to do situps! he will then make friends and enjoy being active. Sorry but you are coming at this all wrong.

Talk to him, find out if there is anything he would like to try. If he doesn't have any particular interests sign him up for a few taster sessions of different activities and allow him to choose Which ones he likes.

The way you are going at this, he is going to loathe exercise. It should be a fun and social experience.

Agree with the PP. He needs to develop a healthy attitude to exercise, not see it as some form of punishment. It may work initially, but chances are he will avoid it his entire life if forced to do it.

Can you exercise with him? Agree with a team activity, but how about walking/running together or bike riding? Being out in the sticks is actually ideal. You don't need a sports stadium! How about horse riding? It can be a very good form of exercise and is highly addictive! If you have a dog he could walk (properly walk, not meander!) that.

Good luck OP, well done for addressing the issue. Many people just hope it will go away on its own.

Agree about a team activity, or perhaps swimming once or twice a week. There's also things he do at home which don't have to be hard core exercises even if it's kicking a ball about, shooting hoops, going for walks, playing on a trampoline? I would also limit Xbox and screen time and perhaps use this as a carrot to say no excersise no screen.

Sit ups won't work. You need to make fitness part of all of your daily lives.

Can you all cycle to work and school instead of car? Make screen time only after 6pm for all members of the family, so that includes you.
Healthy wholesome cooking and baking. Ie he can eat cake if he helps bake it so encourages cooking skills, but don't buy that kind of stuff.
Can you as a family go to the natural trust type places, orienteering, to the beach at the weekends? Take up indoor rock climbing etc.

I as an adult run 5 out of 7 days, and swim 3-4 times a week. Also walk everywhere and do things like rock climbing. I would be pissed off if someone made me do sit ups and told me I was fat ( I'm not I'm a healthy size 6-8 but you get my point)

Agree with others. You need to do some sort of exercise which fits into family life. Cycling, walking, swimming on a weekend maybe. Are there sports clubs at school?
Make sure he is eating healthily and not too big portions. Hard as my DD (not overweight) eats bigger portions than me as she is now adult height and she needs it. Fill him up with vegetables in that case and brown bread/rice/pasta. Porridge in morning much more satisfying than cereal and has no sugar apart from the milk.
I still think diet is much more important for weight loss than exercise. I know people (kids and adults) who run/swim/walk dogs and are still overweight.
Good luck!