Eeek we have just hit the realisation that he knows all about all the games older children play

[StrumpersPlunkett]

and he wants them
"but you are only 10 so no - not yet"
"argh I hate you all my friends play Halo," etc

this time last year he didn't know about all the stuff he isnt old enough for yet so he wasn't bothered, but now he does and it is so hard to explain why we have made the decisions we have about what is suitable or not.

HELP!

"All" my friends do xyz - rarely an accurate report on the state of affairs. I tell DD we don't base our parenting decisions on what other parents allow, we make up our own minds based on our values and what we believe to be best for her. And then we just stick to that.

Thanks Lastinglight, the thing is I do say that and we won't be budged, it is just the realisation that he is now aware of the things he isn't allowed where as a few years ago he didn't even know about them.
FWIW he does have a few friends who have parents with alternative views about film ratings and games ratings and also on how much stuff a child should have. One of his friends has had call of duty / Halo & GTA for the last couple of years!

It's a tough one but I agree with the stance suggested above. Otherwise it'll be a relentless pushing of all your values and boundaries!
Mine has just got an X box (he'll be 12 in March) but thankfully hasn't asked for those types of games yet, he's mostly wanting James Bond / driving ones. Oh, and Minecraft of course

Does his school have an esafety group? Could you ask them for some support from within school. We put info about PEGI codes on the newsletter which breaks down the reasons why certain games aren't suitable for certain age groups.

But I also agree just say you're not interested in what other parents do.

Meh. Lets plan this out. Your son gets HALO, he plays the game with his friends. Loves it so much that he wants to do it for real. He then becomes a mass murderer. Do you think that is going to happen? No. However I understand that a game with blood and gore/sex could be disturbing for your son. HALO (To my knowledge) No blood. No gore. No sex. Obvioulsy its up to you but this is my opinion.

itricked HALO has a PEGI rating of 16+ Which means that violence and or sex scenes look realistic with no blurring of images. So if you wouldn't want you child to see someone murdered or raped then don't let them watch a PEGI 16 game.

IYricked, I have no desire for him to play these games at all, ever, but I do understand that at some point he will. For now the system is supporting me in my desire to hold off as I can stick to the guidelines.

I don't think he will murder anyone I just know that once things have been seen it is impossible to unsee them and I beieve he is too young for these images to be in his mind.

I know it's not AIBU, but YANBU. I have a 10 year old ds, and will only let him watch /play older rated things if we've seen them and judge them suitable. If he had friends round and wants to watch /play an older rated film /game, I seek permission from the parents before allowing it.

(but I also won't let them play boxing on Wii sports!)

Could not agree more with you on the "once you've seen / heard things you can't unsee them". I think the themes of these games; torture, violence, rape, unremitting misogyny etc, is just as damaging, if not more so, than the blood / shootings / zombies etc. And I want to protect my child and make sure decent morals and values are firmly embedded before he submits himself to anything that like that

We let DS1 play them for a while for catharsis - he has anger issues, etc, and it helped him get it out of his system after a bad day. Unfortunately, that reflected on the games he and his friends played at school - violent language, etc.

His class teacher raised the issue of language at a TAC meeting. We decided to restrict games by ratings, and explained the reasons to him - the difference between watching videos of games and playing them (active involvement, etc), but also banned videos of banned games (GTA videos were never allowed in first place).

He would not accept that his teacher had heard the language - insisted it was another boy making things up, but accepted restriction. It does seem to have made a difference.