My feed

to access all these features

Parenting a preteen can be a minefield. Find support here.


WWUD? Daughter being bullied.

9 replies

Mrsambition · 29/05/2013 14:49

My 8 yr old DD has been at her school for 2 years now. Her first class p3 was great, made new friends eventually & had excellent marks all year. Then the classes become split in p4 by age groups so 2 p4 classes divided by older/younger.

She has found this class much more difficult. The teacher (admittedly) teaches by strict old school shouting & I have found this had really had a negative impact on my DD. She is an only child & I never shout at her as frankly I don't have too, she is very well behaved.

The teacher has recently paired DD with a more outgoing girl as she found that my DD was quite shy & thought this may help her. (I have just been told this by DD). At the last parent/teacher meeting DD's marks were down considerably from Christmas, even though we do extra lessons each week together.

Also for the past few weeks DD has been feeling sick, not sleeping to well & falling over at school alot. To the point where trousers/tights have been ripped. I've been asking DD if anything is wrong & eventually she tells me this morning that this outgoing girl has been name calling/pushing/laughing etc.

It's had a huge impact on her confidence (which I had noticed & thought it was a phase, tried to help by talking to her, take her shopping etc). The school deny any such thing would happen as "the teacher is very perceptive to goings on in/out of class".

What to do now??

OP posts:
Mrsambition · 29/05/2013 14:51

Forgot to say her p3 friends were moved to the other class and she had to try & make new friends in her p4 class. It will be the same again in p5, two split classes divided now by grades!! Which are now down because of this!

OP posts:
Andro · 29/05/2013 22:07

Raise the issue with the class teacher, including the damaged clothes etc. Failure to achieve a resolution should result in teh matter being pursued up the chain of management.

Andro · 29/05/2013 22:08

Oh, and making sure your DD says something like 'don't do that, it hurts' loudly should help to ensure the attention of staff members.

WilmaFingerdoo · 29/05/2013 22:12

speak to your dd and document all incidences of name calling, pushing, shoving.

Bullying is a sustained chain of events specifically to designed to hurt and humiliate.

Then straight to the Headteacher.

Mrsambition · 29/05/2013 22:19

Thanks for the advice! I've kept the clothing as I had my suspicions, will document what she tells me. There's only a few weeks of term left so I'll raise the issue with the head ASAP.

Thanks again.

OP posts:
Veryunsure · 03/06/2013 19:35

Are you able to speak to the other child's parents? We had a similar issue, we weren't sure what was what because dsd can be rather bossy at times.

Dh spoke to the parents and also to the other little girl whilst parents and dsd were present asked why they weren't getting along. Luckily her parents were receptive and since nothing else has happened at school. They apparently have a zero tolerance but weren't aware dsd was being bullied just thought it was a falling out. I hope it gets sorted and soon for you and your dd

lottieandmia · 04/06/2013 10:44

If the school are fobbing you off then you next to complain to the director of education in your LEA. I hate that there are some schools that do this - it is totally inexcusable.

What will happen next year? (as we only have another half term left of this academic year)

I don't think speaking to the parents is a good idea - how awkward for them - they are not there when it happens. This happens on school's watch and it is school's responsibility to get it stopped.

lottieandmia · 04/06/2013 10:44

need to complain*

lottieandmia · 04/06/2013 10:47

Also I sympathise with the shouty teacher thing. My dd had a shouty teacher last year and it really stressed her out and made her anxious and she has done much better this year with a calmer teacher who can discipline without shouting.

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.