Should I defer my child? He's three and a half?

[SecondtimeMama29]

I don't know whether to defer my child? He's three and a half and is meant to start pre-school in August.

However, his birthday is November.

Some of the kids in his class are already 4.

No. Do you mean pre-school or reception? Most kids have been benefiting from nursery at 3.5, it does them good.

I would let him go to preschool. Here, it's quite normal to start at 2½.

If he's autumn born and going to school in 2024 (assuming your in England) then I wouldn't unless you have some concerns about him.

Preschool is great preparation for school, and the 4 year olds will be off to school soon.

Scotland - not England!

Why?

Because he would start school at 4 and a half and all the other kids would be 5!

With a November birthday he will be one of the oldest in his year at school year. Why would you want to hold him back without a specific reason eg neurodiverse.

He would start school (year one) as a 4 and a half year old not a 5 year old.

Here it goes Form one (preschool) then form two (first year of school).

He would be 3 and a half for preschool and only 4 and half for school.

Most of the children turned 4 in Jan/Feb but he won't turn 4 until November.

He would still go to preschool but I would just delay it for a year - in Scotland every child born in September onwards is eligible to be deferred for a year

Not in Scotland he wouldn't. He would be the youngest.

The children will have a range if birthdays spread throughout the year, not just the extents of the cut off dates.

But if he's a Novmber birthday he'll be in School at 4 in 2024?

The 4 year old will be going into the same class as him I assume.

Deferring isn't a decision that you need to make now, if he starts preschool in August then you can talk to the preschool team later in the year who should be able to help with the desicion as they'll be able to see him the setting a d have a good gauge of his maturity etc.

There will be kids up to 3 months younger than him in his class so while he'd be at the young end if you didn't defer, he wouldn't be the youngest. It's a really individual thing though and so dependent on the child that asking on the Internet won't help you much.

I went to visit the school and most of the kids turned 4 either last year or at the start of the year.

It's a private school so I feel they're pushing me to start because of fees.

They said we could just defer him later down the line if he's not ready but I feel this would give him immense academic advantage as well as sporting advantage.

Why wouldn't you defer and have your child as one of the eldest? Is really my question?

Pre school starts in 2 months. I need to make the decision now.

DS went from the Kindy room to the preschool in the September before he was 3 (in November) because they felt he'd outgrown the younger room and needed more free flow outdoor time and more complex learning opportunities. Your DC is nearly 4! Children 3 months older are starting actual school

If the children are already 4 it's not a preschool

Children are not actually starting school at 3! England or Scotland, surely you can't start school until 5?

Primary one?

That's giving them a massive disadvantage!!!!

He is half way through the year, so other than the age of other children, are there reasons your child needs to be half a year older than others, e.g immaturity, delayed speech. You can only judge it on your child and whether delay could be detrimental or benefit to them - what happens if he ends up in a class with lots of younger children ( by over 12 months), which could be a problem as your child could find friendships more difficult. Halfway through a year group is almost ideal.

And up to half the kids will be 4 when they start remember, as its the Aug-feb birthdays which will be 4 unless they defer.

The only kids I know who deferred were Jan/Feb birthdays... and on autumn birthday with complex medical needs.

The flip side is mine have all been over 5 when they started school- and all have found the final 6 months a drag because they're bored and ready to move on from nursery and be more challenged.

Yes it is. It's called Form one.

Primary one/Form two is for 5 year olds. And real school.

Form one/preschool is more like nursery at school.

He has no delays etc.

That's a good point. Thank you 🙏🏼

I wouldn't defer preschool as it's so good for them, and as I said, the preschool staff will be really helpful in making a desicon about school.

@Canyousewcushions

He's at nursery 4 full days a week.

He will still go to preschool but it will be delayed a year.

The preschool is attached to the school and you have to do form one (preschool) no matter what.

I'm just talking about delaying it by one year.