In a total mess

[kansascity]

I'm 45 years old and periods have been erratic for the last few months. My cycles have become shorter and I thought I was in the start of peri.
Recently myself and DH had a mishap. I think I'm about 7/8 dpo, not 100% certain because of my cycle changing.
Anyway here I am today after having sore boobs all week and being asleep by 8pm some nights.

I took a Clearblue east result test this evening and I'm pretty sure there is a line. I have two grown up kids and there is just no way I can start again at my age. I'm absolutely terrified at the thought of terminating but realistically it just wouldn't be right for me to continue if I am pregnant.

I can see a line there. Did it come up within the time limit? Have you told your DH?

I took the pic in the timeframe. My DH is completely supportive. I'm going to do another in the morning with FMU.

I feel so stupid at my age being in this situation.

Sorry to hear you're going through this. It definitely looks like a line to me but another test will give you a better idea.

I've just been through a termination myself (last week), different age but also have two children & very much done with that part of life. If it does turn out to be positive & you want to chat or ask any questions then please do 😊

I've hardly slept through worrying and anxiety. Done another test with FMU this time and it is negative. I've still got really sore boobs though and I'm not convinced I trust the test. I suppose only time will tell and I should hold out until my period is actually late before starting to panic.

Posted the wrong picture 🤦🏼‍♀️

Gah, after the timeframe there is a faint line same as last nights test. My head is an absolute mess. My DP thinks I should just relax and wait until my AF is actually late - I'm not due until Friday I don't think. My cycles have been so erratic that even if I don't start on Friday I'm possible not late.

This is the one after the timeframe

This must be so frustrating for you with all these different results… are you able to get your hands on a first response early result? Apparently they are more sensitive than clear blues and easier to read with the pink dye. Having said that when I’ve had negative tests there’s never been any hint of a line even after the time frame though even with blue dye tests.

Hugs to you OP x

I'm going to try and get a First response today. I feel utterly sick with anxiety and fear.

My DP thinks I should just chill out and wait for AF now but until I get a definitive positive or my period starts I'm stuck in limbo.

Hi Kansas, I too hope you can get a definitive answer soon. I Googled on the Mayo Clinic website (reputable medical agency), and at the age of 45, the chances of miscarriage are around 80%. Abortion would be terrifying to me too. One option might be to wait and see what happens, and if you're one of the few who carry to term, look into letting an infertile couple (straight or queer) adopt the baby. Not an easy choice, but it's an option. Hope you are doing okay and let us know of any updates.

Thankyou for your replies. I've done another early response test - only a cheapie one as I couldn't get hold of a first response anywhere. It's negative. It wasn't done with FMU, I'm really hoping that the clearblue ones aren't correct and are as unreliable as I have been reading for giving a line.

I definitely will be terminating if my period hasn't arrived by the end of the week when it is due. I'm going to try to put it to the back of my mind and not stress anymore until I have to. It's not helping though to try to not think about it when my boobs are extremely sore I'm hoping the sore boobs that I've had all week are just another weird and wonderful peri symptom.

Hi kansas

how did you get on

Hi,
I think my period is going to come. I'm due anytime from Friday to Monday next week. Today I've had backache cramps and a wee bit of blood when I wiped. If my period hasn't arrived properly over the weekend I am going to test again. I did one yesterday morning that was negative.

Glad to hear that you feel like you're not facing a pregnancy situation - the negative test is reassuring. I remember once when my period was late and I was so worried, I remember so well that I was at the cinema seeing the second Lord of the Rings movie, and after it was over I went to the WC and my period had started and I just burst into tears with relief (I think the very tense movie had something to do with it as well). Hoping for good news for you too!

Well, my period is due tomorrow but today I've had some spotting only slight but enough for me to think my period is going to start tomorrow or sometime soon.

If last test was negative.. sounds like you should be ok.. I’m sure it’s been a very worrying process for you .. hopefully you’ll get your period soon so you know for sure .. keep us updated on how you get on.. hope all goes well for you..x

My period has started, very light flow, it's more than spotting but not full flow if that makes sense? It's definitely on its way

thats great news if your sure it’s your period.. you can get an implantation bleed which can look like a period very light flow.. but by this stage a test should show positive if pregnant

A pregnancy can be a massive shock at this age or older but seems to be happening a lot more these days especially into late 40s early 50s even planned.. if you don’t mind me asking what age is your children .?

AF is definitely here for sure. Which is a massive relief. My children are late teens it would have been a disaster.

That’s great news I’m sure you are so relieved to see your AF .. so happy for you..x