Medical termination, talk me through it please

[Confusion77]

I am due to have a medical termination on the 18th. I'll be just under 9 weeks I think.

I am 100%sure that I need to go through with this, my only concern is the termination itself if that makes sense. I read on another thread that I might recognise the shape of the foetus as it passes? It's that true at this early stage? Also, I'm sorry for asking this, but I have no idea what to expect in terms of pain and blood loss

And timing after the second set of tablets. No one knows I am doing this and I'm keen for that to continue.

I'm really struggling with tiredness and nausea too which is awful in the circumstances.

Thank you. I'm.not sure what I'd do if not. I am at least on my own (No DC).

You can always call 111 if you start to feel like something is wrong. Maybe try to distract yourself, a good book or tv show?

I went through this two years ago, I was terrified of the procedure. It was absolutely ok, I knew it was the right decision for me at that time, haven't regretted it although I wish I was never in that position in the first place. Mild cramping, pretty painless, larger blood clots but didn't notice anything identifiable. I did however bleed for months afterwards... probably about 2/3 months of bleeding after. I felt relieved when it was over. It wasn't as awful as I had imagined although I would never put myself through it again. Sending lots of love, you will be ok xx

@OkayGo thanks, I've gone to bed with a book. Internet isn't working so no Netflix.

@ mothersc that's exactly how I feel, I just can't believe I'm in this situation especially at my age.

It would be tmi to describe what just happened but I'm wondering that that was the pregnancy passing. I don't know, I've been very lucky pain wise if it was. But also very odd if not.

Calling 111 would be less daunting now I'm alone, ime they always send an ambulance and I would t want the children terrified.

Be kind to yourself, terminations are really common I'm sure it's 1/3 or 1/4 women. It's unfortunate thing to have to happen but the facts are that it does happen all the time for a number of reasons, accidents happen... you know what is the right decision for you. Will soon be over and you can move on from it 💕 I honestly didn't think the process of it happening was that bad... mild cramping then passed a bigger clot and that was it so there's a good chance whatever just happened has been it for you. Sure I was 7 weeks when I took tablets xx

Have sent you a PM, OP. Hang in there xx

Exactly, at least you've got that comfort that the kids are out. But I'm sure you'll be okay.

I'm worrying now that it hasn't worked properly. I started bleeding before taking the second set of tablets. I took the high dose of ibuprofen at about 4.15 then the tablets at 5.15. Decided to take some codeine just in case around 7. Had nothing more than period pain. A coiple hours of heavy bleeding and large clots. And then nothing from about 9.30 til just now, when I went to the loo and passed a bit more.

I suppose I just wait and see. I've read back and can see a couple of people who might have had a similar experience so hoping it's all ok.

Hi everyone. Sorry to jump on your thread @Confusion77
But I’m having a medical abortion with BPAS this week.
Obviously dreading it etc. Will be on my own.

Does anyone have a rough idea how long I will be there for?

I only ask as I am traveling from quite far and have to arrange childcare but at the same time I can’t tell anyone about what I’m doing.

This sucks :-(

PS sorry @confusion77 I am just reading more of your thread. I hope you’re ok.
I am thinking of you xx

@YelloThere no problem at all. I had a telephone consultation first, rather than go in for an appointment, as I had the same issue with childcare and no one knowing.

So my appointment was for treatment only. The first past was about 45 minutes (weight, blood pressure, finger prick blood tests etc) and scan (Had to have internal as wasn't far enough along to see properly with external). Signed consent. Then I had to go away while the prescription was written up , they said go back in 2 hours but called me after an hour, so went back, talked through what I was being given, and took first pill then went home.

I did call bpas to find out how long and they said allow 4 - 6 hours. In reality, it was about 2. But i had already had the consultation over the phobe. Hope it all goes ok for you.

Also it depends how far on you are i think, as to whether you take every thing in one go or in two stages. Call them and ask, that's the best way.

Thank you for that, that’s really helpful to know.

I will be 8 weeks or just under so that must mean I will have to have an internal. Not going to like that bit.
And 4-6 hours is good to know too. Thank you.

Are they all women you have encountered?

So you took a pill at the clinic and then given one to take at home 24 hours later, is that correct?

I hope your day today is comfortable and you’re dealing with it all ok.

Yes all women, a nurse for the first bit, a midwife did the scan and everything else. You dont see or hear anything on the scan.

It was 1 tablet taken with water, then I was sent home with antibiotics to take that night. Codeine for pain relief. And the second lot of tablets. Use 4, vaginally or put in your cheek to dissolve. If nothing happens in 4 hours use the remaining 2 . As I had started bleeding, I used them in my mouth (advised not to use vaginally if bleeding)

The midwife wrote on every thing, what to take and when.

Feel free to message or keep posting, it's awful to be alone with it.

Nothing much happening for me now, although I don't feel sick any more (Had terrible morning sickness) so hopefully it has worked and I just had it very easy.

I did worry I hadn't got enough pads on as was going through them quickly but it only last about 3 hours so was ok in the end.

Thank you lovely.

I guess this is something that happens to more people than you realise. But we don’t know about it as we all want to keep it secret. Understandably.

It really is a shitty situation to be in and it makes me a bit angry towards men that they get the good end of the deal with anything to do with pregnancy.

I do have a partner and we have kids already. But he isn’t really an ‘emotional’ type so this to him is not as much of a big deal as it is to me.
We definitely cannot have another child. And I was happy to never have another. But after this has happened it’s made me feel really guilty as I look at my 2 year old who is so cute and clever and I think what if this pregnancy was another her? It really messes with you physiologically.

But there’s no way I could have a baby, money, time, energy, convenience etc. It wouldn’t work.

Tuesday is going to be a hard day. And for the next 5 days after I have the kids alone all day long so I won’t be doing any resting.

How are you coping with it all? Will you be ok?

1in 3 women have an abortion. Very common. It is really hard. I was 100% sure I couldn't continue. I'm seperated (2 yrs) from husband, although it was him I had sex with, once, not particularly wanted by me I have to say. I'm on the verge of divorce, buying him out of the house, and breaking free from his controlling ways, so there was no way on earth I could carry on. It would totally ruin the future from me and the children. In all honestly, I've tried not to think about it too much as I would find it too upsetting. I feel ok at the moment though was very emotional at the appointment and had 10 minutes of sobbing last night.

Men do get off very lightly. Do keep in touch if you need or want to chat.

Sorry to jump on your thread but I've been reading these threads for days leading up to my termination which was on Thursday.
I seem to be bleeding quite heavily again today. TMI but I'm not really 'soaking' pads at all but when I stand or sit on the loo it seems to pour out but not much in the pad. I also have a lot of pain in my right hip. Not sure if I've over done it or if this is all normal in terms of bleeding? I can't see many posts where people have spoken about how much they bleed in the days following.
OP I hope you're feeling better today too

Was it with bpas? Can you phone the aftercare line? I think it's 24/7.

Thank you @Nottalotta is yours soon?

@Babylon12 have you had any children? Just because if you have how does what’s happening now differ to what you’ve experienced after birth?
Or if you haven’t had any it could be that this is normal and you weren’t expecting it. But as Confused77 said you could check with the help line. Either way lots of love to you.

I’m currently feeling anger towards my boyfriend. He does have his good points but the bad are out weighing them right now. He’s got me in this mess and he is just getting on with life as though nothings happened. He refuses to take the day after my termination off as ‘his regional manager is coming for a meeting’ which he can’t cancel.
Oh but it’s ok because he should be ‘back by 8’ (his work is 2 hours away)
Literally no consideration for what I have to put myself through.

Hope all of you are doing ok.

I have had children. Tbh I can't remember, I think it's similar to after childbirth but I can't remember how many days it went on for before it was just light bleeding.
I assume because my womb wouldn't have been very big at all that I wouldn't bleed as much as with child birth, I also think I'm probably over thinking it all as I just want it all over so I can move on.

It was with Marie Stopes, I can call them but I'm not soaking pads so I assume that this is normal bleeding it's just weird that it all comes out with I sit on the loo, bit more scary looking when it come out like that, sorry TMI.

@Babylon12 do you think you'd be soaking pads if it weren't just happening on the loo though? I think they said 2 pads an hour is a lot but also that it's not unusual to get a large bleed/clot a week or two later. Do you feel ok otherwise? I questioned this as I get very heavy periods, and the midwife saud generally you'd know if it were wrong - if you feel light headed, hot, sweaty, dizzy etc

@Confusion77 I fee as well as I should. Don't feel poorly just in a bit of pain still. Feels like the first day of a period each day, I suppose I'm comparing to a period where you would expect that to disappear the following day.

@YelloThere how are you feeling? I'll be thinking if you tomorrow, and hope it all goes well.

I'm feeling ok. I have been stressed to the max today with Ex H but still feeling loads better. Was a bit worried earlier that I felt nauseous, but I don't know. I'm definitely not as sick and tired as before so here's hoping all is well