Older mum thinking about 2nd child

[scosmo]

Hi,

My DS is 4.5 months and I am 43, 44 in December. I would love him to have a sibling as I am one of 6 and loved coming from an large close family but I feel nervous about the work it entails. I tell myself that the 1st 3 years will be tough but it will be worth it but when I am up at 5am, DS is an early riser I worry that it will be physically & emotionally too big a challenge. I am planning to go back to work in September & am sure that my work would not be thrilled if I was off again but this is not really an issue. Any mums with a similar experience.

Have a look in pregnancy, there is a regular thread for mums over forty

We were all frazzled at 4.4 months, no matter how old we were Your baby is very little and he might not be an early riser forever. My dd2 was a much easier baby than my first and I'm sure it's because not only did I know what I was dong a bit more but I didn't run to her every whim like I did with my first!

Obviously only you can decide what to do for the best for you and your family but this is what I think. You are right that it is the beginning few years that are the most knackering. Two is more work that one but the change is not huge. Soon you have two children instead of two babies and I think it's almost easier to have two than one at that stage.

I had dc1 at 38 and dc2 at 39. Now I'm expecting dc3 at 43, dc1 and 2 play together like little angels when they're not tired!. I didn't return to work, I think work as well would be too much. We didn't want dc1 to be an only child with old parents so we decided to have another asap. It's taken a lot longer for dc3 to come along ( due July) so my advice is forget work and see if you can have another. my personal opinion though, as you may need to work whereas we, being old don't have a big mortgage.