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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

Male Midwives - Would You Mind ?

93 replies

hub2dee · 12/06/2005 09:51

Just wondering, quick yes / no / reason ...

DW: "It depends. On the person... how they make you feel"

expatinscotland answered just now on a different thread:

"Male or female, I wouldn't care as long as he/she were helping me get the baby OUT! "

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

JoolsToo · 12/06/2005 16:07

Heathcliffscathy · 12/06/2005 16:08

no i wouldn't mind at all. in fact think there should be more of both sexes!

midwifery is very physical work. i think men could bring lots to the role. only one i've ever come across is one that answered the phone to me at st john's and elizabeth's in north london. he sounded lovely, and very camp!

i don't buy the arguement that a woman will have more chance of knowing what you're going thro, seems to me that loads if not most midwives haven't had children!!!!!

redsky · 12/06/2005 16:43

I had a male midwife attend me a day or so after the birth and I felt very very uncomfortable about it. He was very professional, and none of the other women on the ward seemed at all bothered so I didn't say anything at the time but I wish I had because to me it just felt 'inappropriate'. BTW I'm fine about male gps doing cervical smears etc. so I'm not sure what the difference is but I really did not like seeing a male midwife.

jenkel · 12/06/2005 17:11

I was asked during the birth of dd2 if I would mind a male student midwife attending. DH wasnt happy so I said no, but thinking about it I dont think I would have minded and then felt guilty about saying no, what if I hurt his feelings....OK, a bit over the top but thats what I'm like

paolosgirl · 12/06/2005 17:14

No - it wouldn't bother me in the slightest.
Re the earlier comment about male MW's not knowing how it feels - does that mean we shouldn't allow female midwives who haven't given birth themselves to be at our delivery?

HappyHuggy · 12/06/2005 17:26

I asked my husband what he'd think of me having a male midwife, he said he didnt like the idea but wasnt sure why although if it was an emergency he would care who attended to us as long as they did there job.

Tortington · 12/06/2005 17:42

theres so many people go up there during pregnancy that am not right bothered if its a monkey - as long as its a highly qualified one.

weesaidie · 12/06/2005 17:43

I wouldn't mind at all.

I agree with paolosgirl (sp?). Neither of my midwives had children of their own and were both lovely (and good at their jobs!)

jessicasmummy · 12/06/2005 17:46

The only thing DH objected to, and left the room for was an Asian doctor examining me.... not sure if it was because he had literally just got off the plane from Iraq or what because he isnt usually racist.

My new GP here is Asian, but absolutely fantastic. DH has been with me to visit this doctor and even he says he's a great bloke.

Do think it was the Iraq thing that set it off for him.

spangles · 12/06/2005 17:56

It would seem strange to have a male midwife, but so long as they were nice, caring simpathetic etc.. then it wouldnt matter.
Most of the female MWs I have come across have been very friendly and nice which is what you need, but some of them are just like robots doing their job by the book and I think there is no need for that. At a difficult time in your life you need someone you can talk to and regard as a friend for the time that they spend with you.

ChaCha · 12/06/2005 18:00

When you say 'he had just literally got off the plane from Iraq' - what do you mean????
Isn't this thread about male midwives? and not their nationality? I don't think there's any need to mention country of origin personally.
But that's just my opinion

ChaCha · 12/06/2005 18:02

....and back to the original post...
Don't think so, it was embarrassing enough having a young male nurse ask to help me go to the loo after an op (you know the mobile one)..oh how embarrassing! Mind you, as others have said, is probably last thing on your mind when trying to push baby out..hmmm!

dinosaur · 12/06/2005 18:04

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

jessicasmummy · 12/06/2005 18:06

I was just saying in general re MALE docs/midwives.

Sorry. Will shut up now.

weesaidie · 12/06/2005 18:07

I do think it depends on the person, not the gender. If they are experienced, caring, supportive etc.

I was thinking that in America childbirth is handled by doctors so surely a lot more people have men at the birth there?

The whole situation is fairly messy and undignified and I certainly was just trying to get on with it!

motherinferior · 12/06/2005 18:08

I suppose that because in principle I think male midwives are OK I shouldn't mind IYSWIM

Also the only people I know on MN who had male midwives - Dannie and Pie - both really liked them.

giraffeski · 12/06/2005 18:55

Message withdrawn

dinny · 12/06/2005 19:22

I had a male midwife at dd's delivery and as my community mw with ds (different people). Both were really nice and v good at their job.

MrsMiggins · 12/06/2005 19:33

I had a male midwife during the pushing stage of DS. I was already holding DH by his shirt and suddenly this male midwife appeared. I just grabbed him too & he said "just remember I'm not ur husband so be careful where you grab!"

I didnt care he was male - he was good & I needed him at that time....

incidently I had a male HV with DS and he was apparantely the expert on breastfeeding!! My DH and brother had many laughs about my male HV. I didnt care - he was brilliant at his job too.

snafu · 12/06/2005 19:38

I couldn't care less as long as they knew how to do their job from a clinical pov and knew how to treat a woman in labour - with kindness, support and sensitivity.

Jessicasmummy - I really don't understand your post.

dinny · 12/06/2005 19:42

Jessicasmummy - whaaaat? Are you serious?!!!
"My new GP here is Asian, but absolutely fantastic." Er, don't think the MN powers-that- be tolerate racist comments.

btw, Iraq is in the Middle East, not Asia.

WideWebWitch · 12/06/2005 19:48

Jessicasmummy I would ask you to expand but fear it will offend me and many others and fuel a fire so I'd probably rather you didn't but I will just say that I didn't like the tone/implication of your post. Er, wtf has Iraq got to do with an Asian doctor?

suedonim · 12/06/2005 19:54

I had a male mw for postnatal care in hospital with dd1 and there was also a male HV in our town, who did his rounds on a pushbike. I also had a male nurse attend me after an appendix op, when I neded a catheter.

starshaker · 12/06/2005 19:54

i had that many doctors poking about me it wouldnt have bothered me if the midwife was a bloke it was a male doctor that eventually delivered (i use the term very loosly as she just arrived on the bed no time for nothing) but it was him that stiched me up

Miaou · 13/06/2005 10:27

No I wouldn't mind having a male midwife. Plenty of male doctors/anaethetists/paediatricians around when I gave birth before, all very nice people. Far more important is their personality/compassion/professionalism, than their gender.

I think I've just said very clumsily what has already been said several times before!

Turning into Yoda I am

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