ooops I'm pregnant again!!

[deedee73]

had my third child in December, my dh decided to have a vacectomy to save me having to go through a sterilisation, which he had two weeks ago. Just found out I'm 7 weeks pregnant and he wants me to have a termination, which I cannot do. His arguement is financial, house not big enough and so on, i agree with him in principle but I cannot terminate a healthy life. We have been married for 13 years and this is the most difficult time, and the most upsetting time.

Don't know what to say really. It is very true that economical constraints, etc are major issues however, I wouldn't be surprised if your DH ends up loving the baby to pieces once he has had a look at him/her. Don't know if this helps, but I understand your point and I believe that if I were in the same dilemma I would be equally upset.

Would your dh talk to someone else about this? like see your GP? Or even just a friend. It may help him to talk it through with someone who isn't biased, obviously you will be upset each time he explains reasons for termination and so it'll become a battle between you both. It may help him get his head straight.

I don't know if you want others opinions but, i'm in agreement with you. I fell unexpectedly pregnant with my first and we were in no financial situation to have a child, my dp was made redundant and we had no bedroom for the baby! I still did not consider termination cos i believe there is no ideal time to have a child, and you are blessed to get pregnant (when there are so many people out there who can't) then you should value that.
As you already have three your costs will be very low as you'll have all the necessary equipment etc children can share bedrooms so space doesn't have to be an issue.
And as Chandra says, if you went on to have this baby, does you dh feel he wouldn't be able to love it as much? Very unlikely isn't it.

Don't mean to be preaching, just giving my opinion.

Thanks for your opinions, it helps to see what other people think, and that i'm not being selfish. fortunately my dh feels that a termination would be the wrong decision. This has been the longest week ever and the most upsetting. I would not of had a termination no matter what my dh decission was, but obviously I have to take his feelings into consideration.

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