Pregnant with DC2 - DS1 is only 8 months - reality of it has hit and is terrifying...

[newmomma]

Hi Peeps,

Haven't been on here in a while (since being pg with DS1)...

Have just discovered I am nearly 6 weeks pregnant with DC2 (unplanned but happy about it), but the reality of the hard work facing me is starting to hit home.

I have to go back to work in about 4/5 weeks and am stressing about the logistics of that without worrying about the new baby. My son has never taken a bottle (severe tongue-tie at birth) and so I have breastfed him this far and am still doing so. I know I have to get him down to 2 bf's a day by mid October and I thought it was do-able until his solid eating went downhill recently. He seems to have developed a 'lump' phobia and won't eat anything unless its puree'd. Which worries me that he's not getting anough calories as he's started waking in the night earlier and earlier. 2am last night. And he just wants boob.

So in the middle of stressing about that I discover that I am pregnant again - which to top everything off - I think is affecting my milk supply. As you can imagine this is my sons main food supply while he's struggling with the lumps. I give him loads of finger-food, pieces of bacon/chicknen/squash/baked potatoes etc but he doesn't seem to actually get much inside him.

And if that isn't enough there's the whole 'babies 16 months apart' argument. The few friends I have told so far just seem to give me a standard response - "you're nuts!".

Is there anyone out there who can give advice to me regarding what it is like to have two LO's very close in age (ok its not 9mths but I'm still freaking out!) and whether anyone can offer some advice/experiences regarding the feeding issues.

Have tried giving DS1 drink in a cup - which goes ok some days ond not on others - he certainly would never drink anything like the amount of milk he'd need from a cup - he just kind of sips IYSWIM...

Not sure I can really give you much advice im afraid but I have a 13 month old ds and am expecting number 2 in December so will have 16 month gap too. To be honest this pregnancy has flown by, havent really had a chance to think or relax. It has been tiring but dh got his orders very early on and does all ds baths and gets up with him in the morning if he wakes too early.

My son was very slow at eating lumps too. Was always quite happy with finger food but anything slightly pureed was an issue. He wont allow us to spoon feed him either which means his meals are limited to what he can pick up.
I keep saying my mantra of "its going to be hard for a couple of years then it should pay off as they will play together and keep each other occupied" May be wishful thinking on my part but am hopeful

Not really much help but wanted to say you are not alone. xx

thanks frogger77 - sometimes thats all you need to hear! x

hi, I know it seems hard to think about at the moment the fact they will be so close in age but trust me when you do have your next baby it won't be that bad. I have 3 children. The oldest is 6, then a 3 year old and a little girl who is nearly 2 and there is an age gap of 1 year 5 months between the two youngest. if anything I have prefered the age gap between the 2 younger ones as they are closer together. Its nice bringing them up together. Its seems daunting now but it will be another 8 months before you have your baby so your 8 month old will seem older by then. hope this helps xxxx

Not much advice about the feeding issues, although my DS refused a bottle but just about coped with a cup - the CM eventually started making the hole in the top of the bottle bigger (he was about 9m too) and he coped while I was at work. Still bf a lot though. (He's better with a cup than most.)

And I have a 17m age gap between my two and it's great! (It was hard at first, but the littlest is nearly 2 now.) I can't understand why someone would leave longer between children

I'm going to have a similar gap (18 months) and number two is due in March. Yes, it's terrifying but I keep reminding myself that it will be worth it in the end. Have you tried fenugreek etc. to boost your supply (obviously check it's okay in pregnancy)? Ditto pp about trying a sippy cup rather than a bottle - or even a small open topped glass like a shot glass has been known to work!!

I have a 14 month gap between my middle 2 and it is the favourite age gap that I've experienced. It is a bit like looking after 2 babies at first but then they go through similar stages together.

I also have a 5.5 year gap and a 2 year gap I would def do the 14 month one again through choice. At least by 16 months your eldest will most likely be walking short distances which help.