A Wobble....

[curiositykilled]

I am having a big wobble...

I have 2 DCs - ds 4 yrs 3 mths and dd 2 yrs 11 mths. I am 27+1 with boy/girl twins.

My DH (not older DCs bio dad) works away 3 days per week.

My dad has just been diagnosed with extensive coronary artery disease (at 54) which is not suitable for a stent or bypass.

Over the last few weeks as I have been dropping off to sleep I've had flashes of "OH MY GOD 4 CHILDREN UNDER 5"

This has turned into a whole day of "Oh my God" plus looking at messy house feeling useless and huge and breathless. I am struggling to eat while DH is away as never seem to have any food in the house and am feeling a bit smelly/disgusting/agoraphobic to go shopping and cannot justify MORE takeaway.

I just feel thoroughly stuck.

I can't really offer much help, sorry, but did want to send you some unMNlike hugs. x

Oh curiosity.

I dont blame you for feeling the way you do. It is totally understandable to feel overwhelmed. I am so very sorry to hear about your dad.

Right - is there anyone nearby who can come and help? Friends / family?

Failing that - do you have any spare cash to maybe get a cleaner to help you keep on top of things in house for the next few months?

Thirdly - can you get yourself to your GP and have a chat with them? There is a lot going on with you and you need to talk to someone.

Finally - when were your iron levels last checked? With twins especially - lower iron levels could be contributing to you not feeling as well as you could.

Everything will be absolutely fine! Please just talk to someone.

messy house is no problem - learn to live with that - with new born twins it is inevitable anyway (in my experience). Make a game of clearing away all toys before bedtime and it will get better. Any chance of getting help with laundry ? That one is the one that really depresses me because it seems to mount up again as soon as you get it cleared.

Try getting shopping delivered - then you don't have to go out to do it. And then try and get yourself out for a walk in the fresh air at least once a day.

It will be better than you think - the oldest will be a school presumably, and probably your dd will go to nursery/playgroup for a few hours a week before long.

No advice about your dad - that is one of life's meaner examples - but the rest - you need a positive outlook and simple solutions to small problems that gang up on you.

Still wobbling a bit. Have decided just to let the wobble happen and wait for it to finish. Am going to get some shopping delivered - thanks throckenholt, and include some pregnancy multivitamins - dal21, have been taking iron but probably would make me feel better if I'm not managing to get proper food down, thanks.

Thanks for the MN hugs.

Dad seems to be coping quite well. he's trying to work all the time - think to prove he is not incapable, but the doctor has signed him off for 4 weeks and said he can't go back to work without being re-assessed. He's in quite good humour and is making jokes about dying - for him that's quite healthy. Hope he'll be fine. Doc says he has good back up bloodvessel system which is promising!

How are things going now, curisoitykilled? Thinking of you. x