Well nobody mentioned THAT!! Things I never thought about pregnancy until I actually got pregnant

[heylottie]

I consider myself fairly well read on all things fertility and baby, having been ttc for some time. But now I am pregnant there are things that I am still surprised about.

1. Drool - I am sure I never used to wake up in The Pool of Drool that now greets me every morning
2. Baby gender - was always adament that I would never want to find out the sex, but MY GOD the temptation to ask at the 20 week scan was nearly overwhelming! I didn't but golly...
3. That I would need panty liners some days (TMI? yes but still)
4. That listening to Matchstick Men and Matchstick Cats and Dogs on the radio had me wailing (I don't expect this one to be universal)
5. The amount of people who, when you tell them of back ache, gripes and pain, say 'well it will only get worse' triumphantly.
6. That when the baby kicks my first response is still (sometimes) 'Oh I need to fart.'

Any more???

This thread should be made into a book - it's fantastic. I'm only 8 weeks with my first and already recognize so many of these, so I know I can trust the others that I never knew about. I didn't know even nice smells would make me sick. I bought a lavender filled teddy bear for the baby but it's filling the bedroom with an unbearble smell now. I can't keep my eyebrows under control. I can't do the 'lovely relaxing yoga to stay fit' because even taking a deep breath makes me want to up-chuck. I try to listen to my body but it's speaking a foreign language, and even though last week all I could eat was baked poatoes, now the thought of them is nausea inducing. And my brain has stopped working properly. And last night I woke myself up talking in my sleep...

Anyone had 'guacamole' discharge? Twice. Not yellowy-green - pure mashed avocado. Yuk.

Blimey I thought I had a tough pregnancy but evidently the reality is that I escaped a fair few of the potential indignities! Drooling?? what's that about? I have Never heard that one before!

That my digestive system would forget how to digest. It would have three modes; acidic nauseus hunger / gross indigestion / excruciating heartburn.
that morning sickness was in fact evening sickness
that trapped wind, gloriously trumpeting farts and bloating would be my constant companions
that I would snore like a warthog
the blocked nose
that for the first time in my life I would feel hotter than anyone else
the cankles. God, the elephantine cankles.
that my belly button would almost disappear entirely
that my face would look pregnant, probably in part due to the four stones I gained in weight
that even after the birth, my joints would feel ancient and I would crack loudly and painfully as I hobbled downstairs in the morning
that stitches can feel as if a master baker has fashioned a cornish pastie out of the sad remnants of one's vagina
that the first post-partum poo is a horrifying prospect

...for starters

This thread has made me laugh out loud!

What about the fact that your stomach shrinks to half its size and whereas you used to love food, now the only thing you really enjoy are chips!!

And the nipple thing... owwwwww

The uncontrollable belching.

Realising that the only thing that would stop me puking in the first 3 months was to keep eating.

Feeling still exhausted at nearly 15 weeks.

Being breathless.

Finding the first scan fascinating but somewhat freaky.

That something mysterious happens to your brain capacity from very early on. The intellect you once relied on vanishes entirely..

I left the car unlocked with the car keys inside in a public parking lot and didn't realise until it was time to go - luckily no one had noticed, PHEW! ...This has never ever happened to me in my life!

I'm only fourteen weeks and already I have discovered -

Having an appetite that changes daily - one minute tomatoes are on the menu despite me hating them normally, the next I'm really into eating watercress or takeaway pizza. It makes planning meals quite tricky.

Everything being an assault on the nostrils. Everything STINKS for some time.

Being faced with the unpleasant choice of heartburn or forcing down horrendous tasting indigestion remedies that make me retch and gag.

That my feet have gone up a size and they hurt and throb if I walk around or stand on them for longer than twenty minutes.

Bursting into tears at the drop of a hat. On one rather memorable occasion for my husband, when he farted a few metres away from me in the bedroom and I broke down sobbing.

Not being able to do a proper poo from about ten weeks on.

Seriously weeing ALL the time.

Finding it hard to believe somedays that I am actually pregnant and being terrified before the first scan.

Crazed hunger - comes on very suddenly and needs to be dealt with immediately or I feel faint, dizzy and can get violent. No-one around me seems to understand that when I say I am hungry, I am REALLY HUNGRY! Then I can only eat a few mouthfuls before I feel totally full.

Snoring, much to my husband's delight.

podrick You don't drool? You freak!! The reason is because all the ligaments and other usually stretchy tissues etc soften during pregnancy due to hormones preparing you for birth ie - watermelon popping out your ! Hence the snoring as your soft palet collapses in your sleep. Out rolls the drool like a constant tap from your fat swollen snoring hairy face. How the hell my DH got me PG again after that, he's obviously not fussy!!

Yes the drool at night- its horrid! After my 1st baby I just wasn't expecting a puffy belly. I looked at myself in the mirror and wept bitterly. 3rd time round now i still dread sneezing as i wet my pants! I was enjoying a lovely walk on the banks of the Seine in April when a sneeze came along and ruined my outfit and my day!
The grumpiness as well in late pregnancy. I used to hate comments on my shape and size but although it still riles me i have learned to just smile sweetly and say nothing when told oh you're big/blooming/neat etc!
As this is probably our last baby I know i'll miss all this some day but right now at 36.5 weeks I wish i could be comfortable!

Just a warning to newly pregnants!! Drink lots of water! Just incase of infections-they are agony! Had a kidney infection twice and it starts off as a back pain (severe! Thought I was in labour) followed by fever, violent shaking and sick! Not nice! And if you do get it-take your whole course of antibiotics-even if you feel better!

People being mean about your choice of baby names! Hits you in the gut because it gets personal! And then they come up with a name you think is awful-but you are to polite to tell them their name is 'cruel'. Its even worse when your mum goes silent when you suggest a name and to try and force you away from that name sends a 50 long list of names!

Pregnancy makes you an angrier person!

Cramps in the legs that are awful and take ages to go away.

This thread is seriously funny and agree it should be made into a book!! Not sure what to add - so much (and more) is covered, but here goes:

• Ante-natal depression - lots known about PND, but actually feeling totally depressed, tearful, angry, irrational etc beforehand too....

• Constipation - serious constipation that when you want to go, you need to go there and then and it can take 2-3 hours to come out!!

• NOT poo-ing during childbirth and being in a terrible constipated state POST partum, being stuck in a hospital toilet, baby back at your bedside, having to pull emergency cord and being MANUALLY removed of your waste products!!

• SPD post partum - sheer agony - nuff said

• Ditto all comments re BF not being easy

• Ditto all MS/nausea comments

• Ditto all nipple comments

• Ditto in a BIG WAY the hayfever sufferers!!

Love this thread...need to add..

that I would not just get swollen feet but calves, arms, face, hands etc... I looked like a hot air balloon for the last 5 weeks of my pregnancy and the worst thing of all was that I didn't even realise how big I'd got until a 'friend' put photos on sodding facebook!

Oh and I certainly had no idea my nipples could stretch so far to feed my hungry boy..oh my God!!

-That from about 8 weeks becoming obsessed about food, any food that anyone mentions at anytime of day irrelevant of being hungry and HAVING to have it...NOW!

-That your huge boobs just get bigger and bigger and that bra you bought to grow into (and would last throughout the pg) is now too small and you still have 5 months to go.

"Bursting into tears at the drop of a hat. On one rather memorable occasion for my husband, when he farted a few metres away from me in the bedroom and I broke down sobbing." (Tears-of-laughter-rolling-down-my-face emoticon)

Oh God, Thingiebob, that's the funniest thing I've heard in ages.

Stupidly, it never occurred to me that I might not get that lovely bump in summer. I was really looking forward to swanning about in all those lovely maxi-dresses. Not to worry - it seems I'm going more down the teletubby route than the svelte earth-mother look anyway...

That pot noodles would suddenly become an enticing and fine dinner prospect
That divorce (from very lovely DH) would feel like a real and daily necessity
That the smell of washing powder would make me sick incessantly for 13 weeks until inexpliacably I suddenly would feel better
That a pale blue dressing gown and various white nighdresses were not the best choice for hospital wear post natally
That I would never be as hungry ever again in my whole life as I was the first few days after giving birth
That being constipated for 3 days after giving birth is actually an appropriate concern to share with all the other new mothers at the hospital dinner table
That (TMI alert) I would feel very horny the whole way through pregnancy, even more so for a week after giving birth and then not again for months and months
That I would be as interested in the details of other womens birth stories

I never knew that when it came time to push baby out, you still got contractions - i thought they just 'stopped' when it was time to push. fuck, was i wrong.

TTC... adoptions looking good now... lol

x

Nobody warned me how addictive this place would be...

1. Terrible leg and foot cramps in the middle of the night

1. A constantly stuffy nose

1. that I'd go off chocolate

1. that "morning sickness" is actually worst in the evening, and that mornings were the one time I felt great

about the birth....

that you can wake up having skipped the first part of your labour with contractions 3 mins apart- seriously!

That when you call the hospital to tell them you're in labour with contractions 3 mins apart they would tell me to try to wait as long as possible and take paraceatomol- WTF!!!!

That your first labour can be over quite quickly- 4 hours and if i'd have taken the stay at home advice I would have delivered at home.

That all of a sudden when you see your baby you have this rush of love shortly followed by a rush of worry- which never stops

That baby girls can have periods- I was only told this after crying ,my eyes ou at the midwife convinced my newborn was dying and it was all my fault

What? Baby girls can have periods??? I didn't know that!

This thread makes me laugh sooooo much!

I am 9 weeks + 2 days, and already have experienced a few funny things:

When I first got pregnant I forgot how to drive for a few days. I'd be sitting in the driveway for a moment having forgot which way to turn the wheel when I reverse out of driveway!

Another thing I forgot was how to style myself. I've always prided myself on my good sense of style, but for about a week after getting BFP I forgot which tops went with which trousers and nothing suited me when I looked in the mirror. Was really annoying!

Worse still was forgetting how to cook in the first few weeks. I'd be standing in the middle of the kitchen looking at the fridge or cupboard and forgetting which items I needed to make dinner That passed and now the feeling I have when looking into the fridge is: everything here smells weird and makes me want to boke.

I will add more symptoms at another stage soon.

Gas, burps and farts. I bet my bump is so large mainly due to gas (I'm only 13 weeks). It shrinks occasionally - this is why I'm sure it's not the baby.

A few weeks ago I was blooming. What the hell happened?

The hot flushes.
The exhaustion.
The dizzyness.
The breathlessness.
The palpitations (probably anaemia but I COULD be having a heart attack).
The panic attacks that I am having a heart attack, causing my heart to speed up, thereby convincing myself I AM having a heart attack.
The chronic constipation - could be bowel cancer of course.
The hypochondria...

Oh dear...