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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

Would this annoy you?

17 replies

staryeyed · 02/04/2009 15:37

Went for my ante natal apt today with MW and returning MW. Was asked whether Im having a girl or boy. "I don't know" I said "I want it to be a surprise". "oh its a boy" they both said in definite agreement. Now I feel really annoyed about it. Obviously its not 100% but they must have some experience in naming the sex and I had said that I did not want to know.

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Kathyis6incheshigh · 02/04/2009 15:39

Oh don't worry, they haven't got a clue. My first mw was convinced I was having a boy from the sound of the heartbeat. I had a girl and anyway there is no truth whatsoever in the heartbeat myth and as a midwife of many years experience she really ought to have known that

IwishIwasmorechocolatey · 02/04/2009 15:40

No, all mw's seem to have their own ideas about sexing a baby from it's heart rate, shape of the bump etc.

None of them can possibly know unless they are scanning you. They all have a 50/50 chance of guessing right, just like anyone else.

Try to enjoy it - you'll know soon enough if they were right or not!

SheWillBeLoved · 02/04/2009 15:40

Take no notice, unless they have x-ray vision, they can't tell. Everyone loves to play the guessing game - seems like they're fans of it too.

alarkaspree · 02/04/2009 15:46

It would annoy me, I think it was rude of them.

But I agree with others, they don't know any better than you do so don't worry about it.

crokky · 02/04/2009 15:49

It does sound a bit rude if you stated you wanted the sex to be a surprise and they then went on to claim that it was a boy.

They can't tell from a snapshot of the heartbeat - the heartbeat goes faster and slower by quite a range regardless of whether it's a boy or a girl. Honestly, even if it does turn out to be a boy, there's no way they could have known. All old wives tales.

Hawkmoth · 02/04/2009 18:28

LOL, if asked, they're probably extremely proud of their 51.9% success rate at 'determining' the sex. Sigh.

brettgirl2 · 02/04/2009 18:32

It wouldn't annoy me, I'd have just taken it as a joke. As someone else said, they can't tell.

YanknbeforetheCockcrows · 02/04/2009 18:39

I'd be annoyed, but probably only because I'm annoyed at everything whilst pregnant.

Why wouldn't they just keep their mouths shut?

brettgirl2 · 02/04/2009 18:40

Well maybe because they are human beings with personalities. Personally it would annoy me if my midwife was too clinical and impersonal.

YanknbeforetheCockcrows · 02/04/2009 18:44

Then why not say something nice about it being a surprise?

treedelivery · 02/04/2009 18:44

They were probably being lighthearted no?

They have no idea and were entering into general what will it be banter?

There is no way of telling from the heartrate or any other way except scan and dignostic screening - so they probably felt they were on safe ground here.

helsbels4 · 02/04/2009 18:46

Unless you were having a scan at the time then they can't possibly tell!!! They could tell by the shape of your bump, or they could tell by the heart rate, or they could just have a stab in the dark and have a 50% chance of being right!!!! They're having some "fun" to get through their day - ignore them

toomuchpicknmix · 02/04/2009 19:17

agree with everyone think they will have just been trying to be bright and chatty cos they know you know they don't know (!?!?!??!)

Longtalljosie · 03/04/2009 08:16

I got annoyed by exactly the reverse this week. West Herts don't tell you what gender it is. For reasons too dull to explain, I had two 20 week scans, and when I mentioned in conversation I wished I could find out the gender I got this annoying, identical lecture from the sonographer with scan 1 and the registrar with scan 2, saying it was "much better" that I didn't know. Better for who, exactly? I think I'll be the judge of that, what with it being our baby and all...

PostAndGo · 03/04/2009 08:25

Bizarre meanies- are they deaf?
I would be annoyed

June2009 · 04/04/2009 08:36

My dentists assistant told me "it's a girl isn't it [...] I can tell by the shape of your bump". Another friend of mine said that to me as well.

We found out it was a girl at a 20w scan so I didn't even think about whether it was rude or not to be honest.
It's just old wives tales though, they cannot tell.

I think that if it was important to me NOT to know then it would have annoyed me a little bit and - on a bad day - I would probably even have made a comment, something along the lines of "well thanks very much, I said that I didn't want to know, now you're ruined it for me!"

One of my previous (20y ago) GP let us in on a secret, he used to say to his patients "it's a girl" but write down on his notes "it's boy". So whatever came out he was always right. (and if they referred to him writing/saying otherwise he could always say: "oh but you remember I told you though didn't I" or "but see, it's written here, black and white."

stoatie · 05/04/2009 19:35

When I was expecting my third child - everyone told me (with great authority that it was aboy) I instinctively knew it wasn't ( I had a girl and boy already. No-one believed me until she was born.

Midwives do not know the sex,when I was having my son - I had delivered head and 2nd midwife commented on her pretty face - one push later and she was eating her words

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