HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! I've just found a fecking SPREADSHEET detailing what the contents of my labour bags (notice bags = plural)

[MadamAnt]

I am so ashamed. I have vague memories of being in extremely painful labour, half naked and being wheeled around the hospital and DH trailing behind with a luggage stack of J-Lo-esque proportions.

I will copy and paste it below for you to mock, but of course the columns won't come out properly:
DESCRIPTION TOTAL TO BUY FOR BIRTH OWNER SHOP
Car seat 1 0 1 MJ
Car seat bases 2 1 1 MJ Glasgow Pram Centre
Microwave meals 1 1 1 MJ Waitrose
Soup 2 2 2 MJ Waitrose
Sandwiches 1 1 1 MJ Waitrose
Big bag of lime tortillas 1 1 1 MJ Waitrose
Big Bottles of water 3 3 3 MJ Waitrose
Vanilla Coke 2 2 2 MJ Waitrose
Bag of clementines 1 1 1 MJ Waitrose
Bananas 4 4 4 MJ Wa itrose
Dextrose tablets 1 0 1 MJ
Bendy straws 10 0 10 MJ
Books, puzzles, cards 1 0 1 MJ
Music 1 0 1 MJ
Camera 1 0 1 MJ
Telephone numbers 1 0 1 MJ
Small change 1 0 1 MJ
Champagne 1 0 1 MJ
Watering Can 1 0 1 MJ
Trunks 1 0 1 MJ

Nursing Bras 3 0 1 ML
Breast Pads 100 0 50 ML
Essential oils ? lavender, chamomile, clary sage, rose 1 0 1 ML
Oil for massage 1 0 1 ML
Plant spray bottle (for cooling) 1 0 1 ML
Hairbands 6 0 4 ML
Old t-shirt 1 0 1 ML
Birthplan 1 0 1 ML
Big old knickers 10 0 8 ML
Maternity pads (packs of) 2 0 2 ML
Nighties/pajamas 1 0 1 ML
Dressing gown 1 0 1 ML
Warm grippy socks 1 0 1 ML
Wash-bag 1 0 1 ML
Make-up 1 0 1 ML
Towels 2 0 2 ML
Witch hazel 1 0 1 ML
Outfits 1 0 1 ML

Disposable Nappies 42 0 18 RJ
Terry nappies 2 0 1 RJ
Stretch Suits 6 0 3 RJ
Vest 8 0 3 RJ
Cardigans 2 0 1 RJ
Hat 2 0 1 RJ
Mitts 5 0 1 RJ
Socks 5 0 1 RJ
Bootees 2 0 1 RJ
Sleep Suit 2 0 1 RJ
Bags of cotton wool 2 0 1 RJ
Vaseline 1 0 1 RJ
Disposable Baby wipes 2 0 1 RJ
Towels 2 0 1 RJ
Sponges 2 0 2 RJ
Baby body soap and shampoo 1 0 1 RJ
Top and Tailing 1 0 1 RJ
Zinc and Caster Oil Cream ? Sudocrem 1 0 1 RJ
Changing mat 1 0 1 RJ
Soothers 2 0 1 RJ
Blanket 1 0 1 RJ

ML = me
MJ = DH
RJ = (unborn!) DD

The irony is that the only thing I actually used in labour was a glucose tablet.

Please please please explain the need for a watering can!!! (The mind boggles)

Watering Can??

Thats so funny - i suspect mine was pretty similar too though.

And books and puzzles and cards! There was no chance of you getting bored thats for sure.

Blimey - is this your DH, MadamAnt?

JackieNo - LOL

I'm a bit perplexed by the watering can too. Maybe it was for pouring water over my nethers when doing a wee post-birth?? I'm sure a small jug would have sufficed though.

lol at the books, puzzles and cards. How naive was I??? (Who the fuck suggested that to us though?)

That was my first (well, eventual) thought about the watering can. Can't imagine what else it could have been for. Baby's first bath?

sorry I just half spat a mouthful of water out reading taht (and to be honest my list wasnt that dissimiliar )

Well gievn teh watering can is witht eh "trunks" i am assuming a water birth was plpanned and the watering can may have something to do with the pool?

RI - a water birth was planned (in fact I have my birth plan here too lol), but I can't see any reason for a watering can. And if it was for fanny-soothing, why would it have been in DH's bag?

Oh, bless you. I just looked at my old one and was going to post it to make you feel better but apart from my hair irons and an eye mask(!) it's nowhere near as mad as yours.

I did spend 2 weeks obsessively searching for the perfect labour outfit though and spent hours customising a pale turquoise kaftan only to labour and give birth in a lycra vest top and nothing else.