Pregnant at 41

[WittyHedgehog]

Hi All i've just found out i'm pregnant very much a surprise but i'm 41 will be 42 when i give birth but all ready have Twin 13 year old boys and a 15 year old daughter. has anyone found the age gap between children and issue. I'm really not sure what to think and my partner isn't very supportive saying it's stupid having a baby again.
any advice from people who have lived my situation would be amazing feeling super alone as worried about what people i know will say when they find out i'm pregnant. TIA

It worked out really well for us. We didn't plan a baby after 40. The age gap was 12 and 15 years but they were happy to welcome her. They two oldest are grown ups now and still have a strong bond with the youngst.

Many people would give their right arm to be in your situation. Be grateful, enjoy and don't worry about what other people think.

Congratulations.

I can't comment on an age gap, but I had my only dc at 45y2m. Only one person commented on my age (my boss), no-one else bat an eyelid. Being an older mum has made precisely no difference to me, ds or our relationship.

I took care to maintain my fitness because I didn't want ds to be stuck with an "old mum". It worked well, no issues. I skied with him until he was 14 and preferred to go with the school and his mates. At 63 I'm still running 10ks. DS is now at uni, happy, healthy, confident.

Perhaps your dh isn't keen on the idea of night wakings again but I'm sure he'll come round.

Thank you that's reassuring, xx

I had my 2nd at 41 (after 2 miscarriages, which are sadly more common at 40+) and although a smaller age gap than you, OP, it’s been great.

I’ve made a point of staying fit & healthy (5K’s) and am bloody grateful for my lovely DD.

I’m 40 and jealous I’d love another

We had twins at 42 there 2 now oldest is 17 got a bunch in-between was a suprise but we love our big family and they all get on all ages

You'll be the same age as my mum - and I'm nearly 60 now. Gap between me and my sisters was +15 years and +21 years. As 'the baby' of the family, it wasn't particularly an issue for me.

I have similar gap. Eldest was 13 when I had youngest at 40, middle one was 11.
It was a delight having a baby. The teen and toddler years though were hard, and now im knocking on 60, with a child still to get through Uni.

To give a different perspective, I know a couple who had a similar age gap between a baby and 3 other kids. Although they love their son, they say they would, with hindsight, have made a different decision. The baby/toddler years were behind them, they were getting time back for themselves and each other and then realised they’d turned the clock way back on all that. Also, you say your husband isn’t on board, if you’re all for going ahead, and he isn’t, that might not make for a happy household.

Congratulations! I had dc3 aged 42. Pregnancy and birth weren't problematic, and I've stayed fit and healthy.

I had a big gap between dc1 and dc2 and that wasn't a problem, it was like having 2 families one after the other really. I really loved the baby/toddler years both times around and I quite liked that I was able to focus just on one child while the others were at school, as I'm a better parent that way.

I was a bit bemused at being treated like a first time mum again and the changes in baby care advice/trends the second time around!