Please help me process this

[Exhaustedtiger]

Hi all. First off TIA for taking the time to read

I am currently 34 weeks pregnant (first pregnancy) and my partner has been inconsistent with support to say the least. One minute very concerned about appointments the next, not at all bothered. This has been very confusing for me and has caused a lot of tears.

The final straw this morning. 3:30am woke up to a big gush. Plainly obvious that it was my waters. Woke him up. He moaned that I had woken him. Said we would go the hospital in the morning and he needed sleep.

Cue me silently sobbing myself to sleep lay down on a towel feeling anxious and scared.

He wakes up this morning. I’ve been awake for hours. Changed my underwear 3 times. He complains about how tired he is. Gets in the shower, puts his coat on and heads for the front door. I say ‘where are you going’ he says ‘work’

He works in hospitality and is very obsessed with his work which we have had many arguments about in the past. I sobbed and begged him to come up the hospital with me, baby is going to be a section and I explained to him that if my waters had been confirmed that they could well deliver today. And/or that if that was the case she would also end up in the nicu more than likely,

He said work was busy and just left. I have been in absolute bits all day. Been in the hospital for the last 8 hours. He sent me one snotty text hours ago. I begged him to come in and said I was scared to be in the operation room by myself and my stomach be cut open and him not be there. I also stressed that he was going to miss the birth of his child and how could he choose work over something this life changing and important.

I am absolutely distraught. I could have had the baby by now and he wouldn’t even know. I’m still waiting to see a doctor (only 1 on for whole of labour ward as well as triage)) but I can’t face going home to him if best case scenario it’s not my waters (which I would be very suprised about)

How do I even begin to process the coldness and cruelty from this man at a time when I need him the most? I am absolutely broken that he has done this. What do I do from
here, with everything? I have honestly never felt so broken :( :( :(

Darling, I’m so sorry.

Stop begging him to do anything. You and your baby don’t need an arsehole present at their birth, and he’ll just cause stress.

He knows where you are and can phone the ward if he can be bothered (he won’t). Turn your phone off and concentrate on you.

@Exhaustedtiger how are you doing OP?

You poor thing. How cruel can someone be to ruin this day for you. That's pure hate!
MKe sure his family know exactly what he did.
For your baby's sake, forget that horrible man and think about this lovely person coming into the world. You'll have eachother. He doesn't deserve it. Don't let him get away with this. Be strong. He cannot undo what he did today.
Xxx

Thank you. I am still broken. I just can’t get my head around how somebody can be so cruel.

Baby is still in tact. Can’t wait for her to be here now to love and to cherish 🥰

Just concentrate on your baby from now on. She will be wonderful.

My first child’s father was pretty awful (not as bad as yours, though). Needless to say, the relationship didn’t last and I regret wasting ANY of my time and emotional energy on him.

Once she’s here you won’t have time or space for him. She’ll be everything.