Anxiety in the lead up to 20 week scan

[AnxiousAnnieB]

was hoping someone would have some advice or tips on how to manage my anxiety in the lead up to my 20 week scan? I have a history of first trimester losses and this is the furthest we have got in a very long time. But I can’t shake the anxiety. Not feeling any movements yet and I’ve got an anterior placenta so I know that may be why. But I just don’t feel pregnant. My last pregnancy that got this far was 6 years ago but I thought you still felt movements sooner with second pregnancies so feeling quite anxious about this. I find the 20 week scan so scary so had been hoping feeling some movements would reassure me in the lead up but at 20 weeks now still nothing

Sending hugs 🫂 I felt the same way about my 20 week scan and also have a history of first trimester losses. Had my son, then two losses and then had my daughter last year. I didn't feel pregnant at all with her - no symptoms and definitely not "pregnant" feeling so it's completely normal. Also had anterior placenta with both children and I didn't feel kicks until later with my second! If you have an anterior placenta it is very very normal to not feel kicks at 20 weeks - I didn't feel my son until around 24 weeks and didn't feel my daughter until around 26-28 weeks. How far away is your scan? Can you have a private scan in the meantime to help reassure you?

Thank you so much for your kind reply. That’s good to know you didn’t feel kicks until later with your second as everything I read seems to say the opposite, but I know deep down the anterior placenta is the reason. It is just hard to calm my mind when I start to overthink. My scan is the end of next week. So not long really but I’m not sure I can hold out. Although if there was something wrong I would probably want to find out at the 20 week scan rather than a private one but I would also love the reassurance if everything was ok.

Hi OP.
I had really bad anxiety whilst pregnant, you should be able to call triage or birth centre (which I used to do) and explain you are not feeling movements and are really anxious and if they could do a doppler for you. They should be perfectly happy to do this for you. I did this from 16 weeks as I was getting really anxious as I didn’t feel movements until around 24 weeks and I had an anterior placenta.
Congratulations on your pregnancy and my god bless you with a healthy pregnancy and baby❤️

The anxiety is awful when you've had previous losses, I totally get it. Not much helped with it apart from the pregnancy progressing but something someone did say to me at the time was "this is a different pregnancy. Different sperm, different egg, different baby and you're a different age" and I found that helpful in knowing that it was normal to feel the way I did. I had every symptom under the sun with my son but my daughter was totally different and made me incredibly anxious! So sorry you're part of the shit club that is baby loss, but keeping my fingers so tightly crossed for you and your little rainbow 🌈