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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Keeping the pregnancy secret?!?

16 replies

EmmaTMG · 17/01/2003 15:40

I have recently found out 'we' are pregnant again (I'm about 5 weeks) with our 3rd baby.
We had a few complications with pregnancy No.2 which thankfully turned out okay so this time we deciced not to tell anyone until the 12 week scan.
However, I have found it soooo difficult keeping it a secret that a times I felt like I would burst. I know it's a exciting time but surely by number 3 I should have been abit more self contained.
Am I the only person who found it difficult to keep the secret?
We told all the family today partly because DS1 realised what was going on and we can't expect a 3 year old(4 in April) not to mention it to Nanny when we next see her but I really wish I could have keep it secret abit longer.
Ho Humm

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EmmaTMG · 17/01/2003 15:42

Opps put this in the wrong topic I think...should have been the pregnancy topic.

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oxocube · 17/01/2003 15:45

Huge congrats, Emma, and yes, we found it hard too ! I think we lasted about 2 days with #1 !!

eefs · 17/01/2003 15:46

Congratulations Emma, hope it goes well for you.

For us, #1 was a total shock, and it wasn't something I'd wanted, so it was kept secret until I was 20 wks! unfortunately my once svelte stomach would not be able for that again. We're currently trying for #2, and I'm feeling increasingly broody every month, so i can't imagaine that I'd be able to keep it secret for long. Besides my drop in alcohol consumption would be noticed immediately by friends!

EmmaTMG · 17/01/2003 15:52

Wow eefs, 20 weeks that is amazing. I admire you 100%.
I would also add that if a friend tells me a secret I don't 'blab' straight away to the nearest person. I'll keep the secret for forever and a day but I just can't keep it when it's me!!

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GillW · 17/01/2003 17:09

We didn't tell anyone until about 20 weeks either - because I knew that as I was intending to carry on skiing until that point, it would be like a red rag to a bull to the "pregnancy police" and I'd get nagged about doing it.

eefs · 17/01/2003 17:18

Gillw, I went skiing at about 7 wks as well, my DP was not impressed, but I was careful and had a great safe time.
Emma I'd put weight on all over and didn't have a particularly rounded belly at 20 wks, so people thought just I was fat

EmmaTMG · 17/01/2003 18:09

I have to admit I would probably of had difficulty hiding a bump anyway as with DS2 I looked 6 months pregnany at about 16 weeks so I'll probably start showing before 12 weeks as this will be my 3rd baby in 4 years.
Didn't ski-ing make you exhausted Girls? Just doing housework knocks me sideways so ski-ing would have totally 'done me in'.

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lou33 · 17/01/2003 18:52

I told everyone straight away with numbers 1 and 2, only a very few knew before about 14 weeks with number 3 , and fewer still knew before about 16 weeks with number 4. I just couldn't face the cries of disappointment from everyone that I was pg yet again ( and believe me there were many!). Congratulations to you though Emma!

Lindy · 17/01/2003 19:55

I was very reluctant to tell anyone as I had always been one of those women who was absolutely, positively NEVER going to have a baby; so I was just very embarressed to tell anyone, especially as I was 42. I managed to keep it quiet until about 16 weeks (partly because I didn't find out myself for 10 weeks), also because we had moved away from family & friends so no one knew me (or my drinking habits more to the point!!). Luckily only one person (a man!!) said to me, quite bluntly' 'oh well, you changed your mind like everyone else'.

EmmaTMG · 17/01/2003 21:28

Lou33, that sounds awful that you had cries of dissappointment for being pregnant. Although I have to admit that one person I've told didn't have an entirely joyful reaction. Some people can be really crap at times can't they? Miserable sods!
Thanks for the congrats.

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lou33 · 17/01/2003 22:20

One of my aunts even asked me why I wasn't "getting rid of it"?! Talk about being blunt eh.

Rhubarb · 17/01/2003 22:24

Congrats Emma! I remember when I told people I was pg they didn't know whether to be happy for me or commisserate me! I do remember one of my so-called friends (I'd had a few dates with him before dh came along) looked at me and said "well it's not too late you know" and I knew what he meant! Bloody men all the time!

EmmaTMG · 18/01/2003 07:55

Lou33,I can't believe an aunt said something like that...Did she apologise? I do hope so.
Rhubarb I glad to see you said so-called friend as what he said was unforgivable too. I would have said 'Well it's too late for you though isn't it, go and learn some manners you idiot' But then I never could keep my mouth shut in that situation.

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lou33 · 18/01/2003 10:46

No she didn't Emma but i am in the lucky position of only communicating with my relatives maybe twice a year. Lucky because they are all a bunch of freaks imo! i don't include my sibs in that tho!

eidsvold · 18/01/2003 14:59

My pregnancy came out of the blue - we were newly married, were not even thinking of trying for a family and because we had some long haul flying - I could not even be sure I had a period the month before. I suddenly realised it had been a while since I had a period and thought to check it. We told very few people until about 8 weeks and then only the immediate family. No one else knew until about 14 weeks or even later. It was a little hard to hide the horrible grey face of morning sickness to my close work colleagues. Unlike others here - everyone was delighted. I am not sure what I would have said had someone been rude. A giggle about how blase kids can be - I was teaching at the time - right up until 36 weeks. I had a year 8 student ask me when I would have been about 30 weeks if I was pregnant. The poor thing was so embarrassed when the other students moaned in despair at this poor ignorant lad. I could not help but laugh and said yes, very!!

EmmaTMG · 18/01/2003 19:19

LOL at the comment about your relatives Lou33.

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