Had 20 week scan...a little disappointed!

[Pontypine]

I had my 20week scan today and found the sonographer to be a little "overbearing"

She didn't seem to have any sense of humour and was very matriarchal in her manner - she even asked for my consent before she carried out the scan saying "are you aware that this scan is to check for anything that might be wrong with your baby, i need your consent to carry it out and to let you know if and let you know if anything is wrong"!

This is my 3rd pregnancy and i have had 7 scans and have NEVER been asked that before!

anyway, we asked her for the sex and at the end she said "i can never give you a definate answer but i am more inclined to say it's a boy but there was quite a lot of cord between the legs" My other half asked how sure she was (last time they told me DD was 70% going to be a girl) and she said "we never give a definate or certain answer or percentages" so we said "are you saying it's highly likely to be a boy though" and she said "not really"

HOW unhelpful was that?!?!

I have had 2 reassurances from friends who have said that she must have had a reason to say she was inclined to think boy because usually if they have no idea they do say "i was unable to see" rather than plant a false gender in your head!

what do you think? should i be "inclined" to buy boy stuff or not? Anyone else had a hitler-esque sonographer?

My sonographer told me that they're now calling the 20 week scan the 'anatomy' scan rather than the 'anomaly' scan because the latter was making people too nervous.

Sorry you were disappointed Pontypine.

I think my midwives did a good job telling me what the 20-week scan was for, and that I should think about and discuss with Mr NotCitrus both whether we wanted to know the sex, and what we might want to do in the event of any abnormalities. There were also NHS booklets about the reasons for the scan and possible follow-ups.

I was terrified for the first 10 minutes of mine, especially when the sonographer went "Oh no!" but immediately continued "Don't worry, just hit the wrong button and lost the data - your baby looks fine so far, sorry!" Mr NC is very chatty and got the two sonographers joining in, both the experienced one doing the scan (I was over 23 weeks, which made it harder), and the junior one who knew how to use the computer, and I used to look at embryo pictures a lot so once I could see all the major structures were there, I relaxed, and they could point out all the geeky stuff.

With mine, it was really obvious what sex he was, so I didn't even need to ask. However it's not always the case - familybaby had his scan a few months ago and was doing somersaults with his legs crossed. The sonographer tried for about 10 minutes and eventually had to say "It could be a boy, but I wouldn't put any money on it. Maybe odds of 60:40?"

I did find the whole thing surprisingly draining and emotional, and went to Woolworths afterwards and cried a bit for the girl I wasn't having (and I'd have done exactly the same if it had been a girl!) It must be very hard for the staff to figure out what different people would find reassuring - I know I would be most angry if my explicit consent to the purpose of the scan hadn't been sought.