Weight gain during pregnancy- upset and confused

[ChefMelanie]

Hi all.

So I'm pregnant, and me and my partner have wanted this for years, and so I am very happy to be so.

So I've struggled for years with eating disorders (since I was 13, I'm 35 now). Ive recovered from EDs, but I think I'll just always be sensitive about my body, it's just in my nature/in my programme.

I started my pregnancy a healthy BMI (about 23.5), 5"4 and 138lbs. I've been eating very healthy and exercising plenty during this time, in 20 weeks pregnant now, and I've put on 9 pounds- which I think is normal, from my research.

Bit something the sonographer said at my 20 week scan today has really upset me, she told me "At 20 weeks, you shouldn't really have put on any weight, the baby only weighs about 500g".

What??? I've got a bump, my breasts have gone up 4 cup sizes, and all the research I've done online (and on NHS online) has said that generally over the course of the pregnancy I'd be gaining 10-12.5kg (that's about 21-28 pounds, like a stone and a half-2 stone). How would it be possible to not have gained weight during that period?

What the sonographer has said has really upset me, and made me worry I've put loads of weight on that I shouldn't have. I don't want to ruin my figure over all of this and damage my health by putting on loads of weight unnecessarily, I want me and my baby to be well fed and healthy. It has made me feel like a failure and fat and worthless and that I'm not doing this properly.

Is the sonographer wrong? What are your guys experience of weight gain during pregnancy? Had you gained much at the halfway point, did you gain a couple of stone during pregnancy and that was fine? I'd love to hear your experiences, I'm feeling rather down and upset about all of this xx

This was me as well. Fwiw I put on 9kg in the first trimester with dc1, so more than double what OP put on in about half the time 🤣. No one ever said anything to me about my weight. I needed to eat beige carbs to survive the sickness so that’s what I did. DC2 was more normal I think, but I also cared less so can’t even remember! and then I didn’t lose the last bit until I stopped breastfeeding, which was when they were well over 1.

Complain. Wrong and not her place to comment even if she had been right.

I met a weird midwife while in the hospital. Another midwife disagreed with her. I've had a very strange health visitor with my third.

9 pounds is absolutely fine.

Sonographer is an idiot AND an arse.

You’ll be carrying water weight, boob weight, amniotic fluid weight, placenta weight and blah blah blah.

My obgyn said to me that if I didn’t gain a good wedge of weight, she’d be concerned.

FWIW, the day I gave birth I had gained 13kgs. Less than a week later I was 4kgs lighter. After a month of eating EVERYTHING post partum, I had dropped to less than 6kgs to lose to get back to pre pregnancy. Don’t believe the horror stories that you’ll never shift your pregnancy weight. It’s not as bad as it’s made out to be (and I’m speaking as someone of a similar age and ED history to you).

Wait for the post partum sweats! It’s insane. You’ll lose about 3 litres/3kgs from that alone.

Sonographer did something similar to my SIL, during her fourth pregnancy. Her first girl, after three boys. It was a big baby, and they asked her eldest son (who was present) “has Mummy been eating too many sweets?”. Even though she’d been through three pregnancies, it caused her undue worry about her baby daughter…

I balloon in pregnancy. 5ft, 49kg normally. Get up to 75kg. Mainly water/baby and have lost it both times without dieting or exercise in 3 months. I feel like a whale when pregnant and gain everywhere. please don't worry and ignore her comments!