Hoping for a sticky one!

[Perimumopausal]

Hi everyone!

I just thought I would post this because I have spent countless hours reading other people's posts and comments trying to calm myself down and ended up sressing myself out more through not seeing others with the same experience.

I am 36 with two living children and one loss in between. The eldest is 13 and the youngest is 9. I have been worried for a while about perimenopause after losing hair, greying and generally feeling achy and old. I had a 5 year copper coil that had been in waaaay over the time it was supposed to be in (around two extra years - please don't judge, I know I am grim!) and I decided to remove it myself in the middle of June this year, which was surprisingly easy, painless and I didn't bleed at all. I figured that if it was that far out of date and nothing had happened, I wasn't likely to get pregnant now.

I usually have around a 26 day cycle, and since removing my coil, I have been a bit more irregular (between 24 and 29 days) with between 2 and 4 days of spotting before I have bled properly. Even then, the bleeding has been very minimal with a few clots and some random uterine tissue. I did have a LEEP procedure in around 2017 and since then, I have been worried my cervix may have been blocked after the gynaecologist couldn't fit the 10year coil due to the amount of scar tissue.

I bought some LH strips out of curiosity and for the first time this month (3rd full cycle), I got a line as dark as the control line on the 14th of September. When I got another just as dark the following day, I had an odd 'feeling' a bit like anxiety just before me and the OH BD'd. At what I am guessing is around 7dpo (basing potential ovulation on the 16th of September), I decided to do a cheapie 'freedom' strip test from Tesco, knowing it was completely stupid that early on, and I was beyond shocked to see the faintest of lines. I then ran to Tesco and got another pack of 2 of the same strip tests and a digital clear blue just in case. Within hours I dipped the strip and it was stark white. Out of curiosity (and because I apparently enjoy torturing myself), I then took at least one every day for a few days following and got stark white negatives 8dpo, 9dpo, 10dpo and 11dpo. Eventually, I figured the test at 7dpo was an evap, even though it had the tiniest hint of pink.

I have had all my usual pre menstrual symptoms, hormonal migraine (also around 7dpo), slight nausea, tender under-boobs, rage, tears, womb cramps, constipation and then needing the toilet, gas, minimal watery/tacky CM and then yesterday at 11dpo, some spotting after I decided to check my cervical position. It was quite low down, a little flat to the wall and slightly open. Not unusual for me at all. The second I saw pink in clear/creamy CM, I knew it was over. I did also wedge a bit of tissue up there and saw more pinky red. I also noticed my boobs weren't as tender. Then I sobbed myself to sleep like a moron.

Today at 12dpo, I decided to do a random LH strip just to see what it would look like at this point in my cycle and it was almost as dark as the control line. I panicked after reading that higher levels at random times can indicate perimenopause or PCOS. I did also read though, that it can be normal for LH to rise just before a period or that it can sometimes indicate early pregnancy due to the similarities between HCG and LH?

I went to Tesco for the food shop and promised myself if I bought one last delusional pack of two HCG strips, that would be it and I would never allow myself to test unless I was a week late, ever again. I fully expected to see another stark white stick of disappointment, but instead I got another squinter just like the one at 7dpo. My brain would not shut up and I waited until I could squeeze out enough to dip the last strip and it looked exactly the same. A friend who is a 'bad influence', persuaded me to waste my only digital and I only went and got a bloody positive?!

Now I'm just scared it won't stick and I won't believe it is even a thing until I see it on a screen.

Current situation: I still have heaviness in my womb area and I feel like I could come on my period at any moment. My boobs don't really feel as tender. I always have weird vivid dreams and indigestion anyway, so I wouldn't notice if those changed. I haven't needed to wee more than usual. My nipples haven't darked, got bigger or become like bullets. I'm not any more tired than usual. I honestly don't think there is anything I can say is noticeably different.

Good luck everyone trying to get their BFP and I hope this helps someone losing their mind the way I do.

Hopefully you can see the strip from today that I had to edit like hell for it still to be barely noticeable! 😂 I still can't get my head around how a digital picked anything up at all. The strip test from 7dpo and the second strip from today looked pretty much the same.

I have taken quite a few but after I got a second 2-3 week clear blue instead of a 3+ I gave up because I didn't want to stress myself out any more than I need to. I have occasional cramps, kind of tender boobs when I have a bra on and I am hungry but that's about it. I just want to know it's not a blighted ovum. Whatever happens after that is down to nature but I hate the thought of walking around thinking I am growing a tiny person when there's nothing in there. At least then, I will know either way.
Sending you all the baby dust for tomorrow!

Hi, would you mind if I joined your thread please?

I am currently 6 weeks 4 days pregnant after IVF, which came after 4 years of infertility.

my due date is around 7th June which I think aligns with all of your due dates.

I have looked at the other June due date threads but have found them really overwhelming, I’m not sure if it’s because I am anxious after infertility and ivf but I just couldn’t join them!

I have my early viability scan at the clinic next Wednesday and if that goes well we will graduate from the fertility clinic and I am just taking each step as we go 🩷

@JustAnOrdinaryHuman I am so glad your scan was positive! X

You are so welcome here! A gentle but very excited congratulations on getting a positive result after so long. This must feel like such a surreal and delicate time. Is this your first? Your viability scan is the day before mine so we can keep each other going at least for the next week! How are you feeling in general?

Oh thank you @Perimumopausal

honestly, I still can’t believe it worked at all and I can’t believe it worked on the first cycle and transfer. It feels very very strange. And I feel very lucky that it did work.

i have one son from a previous relationship, he is almost 12. We haven’t told him yet and I’m so excited to tell him

yes I saw your scan was close to mine! I feel like the next week is going to drag so much. How are you feeling about your scan?

I feel good, I found out I was pregnant as I dragged myself to the clinic 6 days past transfer in a complete state, really unwell and in a lot of pain and it turned out I had got late stage OHSS (ovarian hyper stimulation syndrome- which can be a risk with IVF) because I had fallen pregnant, so I was really unwell for the first two weeks but luckily it’s passed now and I feel much better! I am on a lot of progesterone until 12 weeks so I think that is a factor in my symptoms but I am starving and I am knackered lol, have felt quite nauseous today too. How about you? How are you feeling? X

I am really happy that it worked first time for you!

My son is 13. I am a bit nervous about telling him because he is absolutely not keen on having another sister. He has a younger sister and an older step sister here from the relationship I had after his dad and he also has a sister from the marriage his dad had after being with me. It's all feeling a bit Jeremy Kyle because I'm 7 years into a different relationship but he has no living children. If I gave my son a little brother, he would probably be a little happier but my kids haven't had the best experience due to trauma so I can understand them being wary. My daughter will be really excited regardless but I won't be telling them until I have made it to 12 weeks.

I keep switching between feeling okay and almost ignoring that it is happening, to feeling hopeful and excited, to feeling pessimistic but accepting, to feeling petrified. It's a really anxiety inducing time. I just have this horrible feeling they are going to poke that wand in and tell me there is nothing there. I know it probably sounds strange but it's not the fear of losing a baby that makes me the most anxious, it's the thought of there being nothing there in the first place. I have never had an early scan before but for some reason, this time around I am finding myself unable to cope with the waiting. I don't know if it is because of my age or past experience or what. I am with you though, this next week is going to drag. I have a countdown on my phone screen and that has helped a bit, seeing the numbers go down. Being busy at work has probably helped too.

I have never heard of OHSS before but it doesn't sound pleasant at all! I am glad that seems to have faded out.

I have felt hungry in the middle of the night since a few days before my positive but I didn't think much of it. Apart from that, I have been a little constipated but that usually happens before my period anyway. I have indigestion frequently because I am plus size so that hasn't been a symptom out of the ordinary either. Cramps in the uterus have seemed to taper off in the last few days. My boobs have been a bit tender but nothing more than before I am due on and only seems to be a thing if I am wearing a bra. Tiredness and nausea are a daily occurrence for me anyway and I probably don't even feel as crappy as usual so maybe the vitamins are helping on that front 😂

I am starting to feel a bit frustrated over the last couple of days with being simultaneously hungry and full and not fancying anything but wanting to eat, but I am hoping this is my first signs of "out of the ordinary" symptoms.

@Perimumopausal I am sure your children will be ecstatic about a new baby once they get used to the idea! We are going to be telling my son and family after my viability scan (if all goes well) as I already have a bump that I can’t hide, I know it’s bloating from IVF and the hormones but I can’t get away with saying I just put on weight it’s only on my tummy and pretty obvious lol

they are all normal feelings I think when the journey hasn’t been a straightforward one. I feel the same most days and I am generally an excitable, chilled person. Hopefully scan day comes round quickly (it won’t) for us!

honestly it was awful, I had no signs before transfer that’s why I was given the go ahead for having a fresh transfer. But the pregnancy hormone can start it so that’s why I got it late. I am on blood thinning injections now as well as everything else until 12 weeks… I worked out that I would have done over 300 injections by 12 weeks through this whole process! Crazy when you think about it

i think you said you suffer with migraines? I do as well and I had an awful one last week and all I could take was paracetamol so that was wonderful, it lasted 3 days and I was floored. If I keep getting them I think I will have to ask my doctor if there is anything else that I can take that is safe

i hope you have a good day, I have a very quiet day in work today with only one meeting so I am hopeful I can fit in a nap on my lunch break! X

Because I am a squidgy person anyway, you could easily think I just ate too much 😂 but the bloating is horrendous. By the evening, it is a solid 6 months!

We can do this! Only one week to go.

300 injections sounds absolutely awful. 😵‍💫 I don't cope well with medical needles at all. Are the blood thinners as a result of the OHSS? I will have to do a bit of research.

Yeah I do get migraines. Usually when I have a shift in hormones. They usually knock me out for a couple of days. Luckily, I haven't had one in a little while, so hopefully I will be safe from them for a bit.

I was supposed to be at work today. I work Monday to Friday because I am in school, but my daughter wasn't feeling great this morning and so we are currently sat on the sofa. I hope you get your lunch break nap!

ive just got home from my scan.
we seen a strong little heartbeat flickering away which was so reassuring to see. I thought I was between 6-7 weeks more towards 7 weeks but they’ve dated me as 5.5/6 weeks apparently.
there’s also another sack with no signs of a pole etc but I’m back in 2 weeks to see if it’s caught up or if it’s a bleed

YES! This is good news. Do they date from conception or from your last period because it would make sense if it was a week or so different wouldn't it? I never know how they do it.

@Perimumopausal no idea. My last period was the 3rd sept so that’d make me 6 weeks toddy but I normally have very short cycles so it would make me 7 but if I ovulated later I guess it’d make me 5.5 🤣 it’s very confusing and I also didn’t think you’d see such a strong heartbeat at 5.5 but little one does which is a great sign, I got a 3+ on a clear blue on the 3rd of October and all my test have been dark so i’mthinking the empty sac may be vanishing twin.

I told them about the pains I get through the night which I can only describe as burning and they wake me which she said was normal 🤦🏻‍♀️

I’m so bloated, I look about 5 months pregnant not 5 weeks

Oh! Our last periods were exactly the same date! I am bang on six weeks today. I got my 2-3 weeks pretty quickly but then I was still showing as 2-3 weeks on October 8th and I panicked. I got one today just to see if it had moved to 3+ but I'm nervous to do it in case it hasn't moved, or worse, goes back down to 1-2 or says not pregnant. I'm an idiot really. My symptoms seem to not be around at all today which isn't helping the brain and I haven't gone to work because my daughter said she was feeling unwell. That hasn't ended well because she is actually fine and I ended up over reacting about something this morning and now I feel guilty and so we are sat here eating Macdonalds. Not the best of days 🤣😭

Burning pains? How strange. Where are they? I am also very bloated, even for me. I would post pictures but they are a bit grim hahaha

@Perimumopausal ah really we could be due date twins
see I calculated 6 weeks today but I got told if you have shorter cycles your further along 🤷🏻‍♀️
I’m sure all will be clear at the 12 week scan and they can give me a proper date.

so the pains are mainly through the night, it’s like my ovaries are burning/fizzing that’s the only way to describe it, atm it’s a 7/10 but I had exactly the same with my little boy and that was much worse, I’d be in a ball on the floor in agony.

my symptoms come and go also, it’s very bizarre isn’t it but apparently completely normal.

have you done the test yet? Or are you going to leave it? I know some people don’t move from 2-3 and their pregnancy carries on as normal, it’s all very nerve wracking isn’t it

Aye, my cycles are usually 24-26 days long. When I got pregnant with my son after three years, the only day we did 'the thing' was on day 5 of my cycle! Literally 4 days after my period started! Having a shorter cycle would naturally point towards earlier ovulation and certainly that month I must have ovulated really early! I can't remember with my daughter because I was living in survival mode. I am sure shorter cycles can also indicate a shorter luteal phase as well so I guess there is no way of knowing which way around it is without accurately predicting ovulation. I know I ovulated around day 14 this time because I got positive LH strips on the 12th and 13th day of my cycle and they say you usually ovulate anywhere up to 36 hours of seeing a positive don't they?

The ovary fizzing is something I can weirdly understand but it isn't anywhere near as intense as you are describing it. That doesn't sound fun!

I did do the test and finally got the 3+. I know it doesn't mean much in the grand scheme of things. Some people get it and end up with a loss anyway and others never get it and go on to have a healthy pregnancy, but it brought me peace of mind for now, so that will be me done with testing now.

How's everyone doing?

Any tips on how to manage morning sickness? I've never had anything like this before & evening with the anti nausea meds it's awful. I feel sick 24/7, I retch frequently & am also sick at times as well.

Honestly, with my other successful pregnancies, no amount of ginger biscuits, peppermint tea, special wrist bands or other random suggestions touched it. In the end, I just found a food I didn't mind the taste of coming back up. Sorry that isn't much help 🤣 I used to eat a square of mint Oreo chocolate bar every so often haha. Sometimes having a specific smell that I could carry around helped. I wore a necklace with an absorbent bead in it so I could sniff it whenever I felt dodgy. Didn't always work though. I couldn't be anywhere near my daughter's dad because the smell of him had me vomiting. Even thoughts would make me throw up!

Hope everyone is okay. Really struggling with anxiety today feeling like there won't be a baby in there when I have my early scan on Thursday. My brain just will not accept it at all. I wish there was a way to switch this off.

@Perimumopausal how are you feeling today? The anxiety and over questioning is the worse. I'm so hopeful you have good news at your scan & the wait doesn't feel too long.

@Perimumopausal totally understand how anxious you are.
even though I’ve seen the little bean I’m still worrying about my second scan on the 3rd, I think if you’ve suffered losses previously it’s the natural route your head takes which it shouldn’t.

how are you feeling?

I’m extremely nauseous, sore boobs and so so very bloated like I don’t think I can hide it much longer 🤦🏻‍♀️

I am so bloated it's not funny, but if people didn't know, they would probably just think I ate a bit more than usual. I hadn't felt nauseous until the last couple of days but I also got a weird bruised pain feeling in the tip of my shoulder earlier and so the obvious "it's ectopic" narrative kicked in. I just want Thursday to hurry up so I know it's real. That's all I want.

@Perimumopausal what times your scan Thursday?

@Samthenanny
My appointment is at 12.15 on Thursday. The closer I get, the more I am freaking out 🤣

@pastelheart
How are you feeling about tomorrow? I am hoping all is still well and your appointment is still going ahead.

@pastelheart
Thinking of you today 🖤

@Perimumopausal sending lots of positive vibes your way today.

Thank you! I just arrived at work so hopefully that will keep me a little distracted for a couple of hours x

Hi everyone,

I have just got home from my scan. I saw a heartbeat and have been dated as 7weeks 2days which is pretty much where I thought I was, give or take a day. I feel much better now I have seen there is something there and I am not going to get a surprise blighted ovum or ectopic a few weeks down the line. Fingers crossed it holds on now 🤞

Hope everyone else is okay x