Feel so ashamed....just found out the sex

[FeelingSoAshamed]

I have changed my name for this as I am too ashamed to use my regular name.

I am 12 weeks pg with DC3 and have just had my nuchal scan - all fine. At the end, the sonographer said, "shall we have a look to see if it's a boy or a girl?" and I readily agreed. He said that at this stage, there is an 80% chance of being correct as you are looking for a shape. Apparently, girls' bit slant to the side whereas boys' point upwards.

It's a boy - and I am gutted. I have 2 DDs already and assumed that I would have another one. If I am really honest I would probably have wanted another girl if I had had a choice. DH is over the mooon, esp as this baby was unplanned and he has been a bit hesitant about it until now. I can't believe how dreadful I feel. And I also can't believe what a shitty person I am for feeling like this. My beautiful baby is healthy and I had the best odds of all being well out of all 3 pregancies.

I am now at home and having a little cry. My girls are out til 2pm. I love them so much and have such a wonderful relationship with them, I just don't know how I am going to have the same with a boy. I simply can't imagine being the mother of a boy, but I obviously am going to be so need to get used to it.

Thanks for reading this far - please can someone give me a round slap around the head and tell me it'll all be OK? I know in the grand scheme of things this is a daft thing to be upset about but I can't help it.

TIA

You will love your little boy just as much as your dd's i promise!!!

I had 2 boys and had 2 dd's much later. I was gobsmacked when dd1 was born as i had longed for another ds. I am now the proud and besotted mum to 2 ds's and 2 fab dd's.

Give yourself time xx

I always thought I would have a dd, and couldn't imagine having a nasty smelly boy baby.

But...... now ds is 11mths and I wouldn't change him for all the tea in china. In fact now I really hope that I have all boys as I want a tribe.

Boy's are fab..ive got 2 really close together ds1 has just turned 2 and ds2 is 5 month, and if im honest....i dont think i'll have anymore kids for a number of reasons, but mainly because i don't know how i'd feel if it was a girl

I know that sounds really so awful but i think its just coz im used to having boys, just like you are with your girls...but im sure you'll love your boy just as you do with your dd's

I didn't find out the sex with DS (2nd child) and thought I wouldn't mind either way but I have to admit once he was born there was a hint of disappointment that he wasn't another girl. It lasted maybe a week or so but now I am glad and always say I'm happy we had a boy else I wouldn't know how good boys could be!

At least finding out now you have plenty of time to get used to the idea before he is bornin a month or so you'll probably be walking around mothercare getting excited by all the little boy outfits

It'll be fine.

Pull yourself together.

lol hunker

although I have suspicion you would have told me off for saying similar

You wouldn't have said similar though - I'm the boy fan round here

oh gosh boys are SO delicious
do your cry and then go and buy something sweet for him

its why I haven't dound out the sex of this one as I already have 2dd and presume I'll have another

my friend was distraught when she found out her dc3 was a boy and and not another girl as she'd expected but you want to see her with him now, she wouldn't be without him in any sense

am sure its just an immediate reaction to the shock of something a little bit different

pmsl @ Hunker

Anyway, Enid, I just like telling you off. Gwan, let me.

anyway, just think of how much you will please all the old ladies who will assume you are trying for a boy (the Holy Grail after 2 x dds )

Boys rock.

Congratulations. I'm glad all was well with the nuchal scan.

Don't beat yourself up about it... better to acknowledge the emotion now than later. I too had an unplanned 3rd preganancy (after 2DDs) & was petrified it was a boy, as was DH: basically we thought that even if it was unplanned we'd know how to deal with a girl (ie slot her in) where as a boy was a whole new dimension. We had the prospect of 3 under 3 with the youngest one being testosterone filled

As it turned out, DC3 was a DD but now that plenty of time has passed and I have 3 wonderful healthy DDs there's a bit of me that wishes somewhere along the way we had a boy in the family: it'd be nice for the girls to have a brother, me to have a boy, DH a son to potter about the garden in that boy way... DH loathes football and other socially acceptable manifestations of masculinity but is terribly sweet in a way he doesn't even notice with little boys eg saying "careful son" when they are doing something potentially risky. He is naturally much more physically cautious than I am and it's only since DDs got to school age that I realise how restricted they've been in terms of eg climbing trees: they had no interest in it so we didn't push them to but if they had a brother perhaps this might have happened naturally. As it is, we've had to actively push them a bit and now you couldn't find a bigger band on tom boys.

I guess what I am saying is that the world is made up of men and women and it's nice for families to reflect that!

You shouldn't be ashamed. We all have wobbly, hormonal moments when all rational thought goes out the window.

But speaking as the mother of a son I think you are one lucky lady. Boys are just lovely and afectionate and just

God I'm broody.

It's quite normal to feel like this IMO. We found out this week that we're having a boy too, and I had been hoping for another dd. I was/am a bit disappointed, but have been advised that all I need to know is that boys bash stuff and like sticks and stones and snails . Am getting used to the idea now.

MILF - have you forgotten about the ante-natal thread you joined? Pop over and say hello!

Little boys love their mummies soooo much. You will get used to the idea given time and you'll love him very much I'm sure. I felt the same with Ds but for very different reasons and he was my first pg through to fruition. He's fabulous!

Oh i do love little boys, they are so sweet and loving. I find my dd such a struggle compared to them. I am pregnant too and may have a little weep when i find out this one is a girl (i have a sneaking suspision)

It will all be ok

AS a mother of four boys i would say that advice is sooo wrong csws

boys are more gentle imo - more loving
those stereotypes of thuggish boys is what give boys a bad name

S'ok BM - dd likes stones and snails too . Thanks for your CAT btw .

He'll be lovely
And just think what a wonderful man he'll grow up to be with 2 big sisters to teach him about the world!

I have 2 DDs and if I am totally honest wanted DB3 to be a DS, mainly for DP as I knew he really wanted a little boy not that he doesn't adore the girls. DP is also the only son of an only son and both out families are so girl heavy.

I thought DD3 was going to be a DS and was so shocked at the scan, did feel disappointed, not at having another girl but at the thought we won't ever have a son.

But you know what the disappointment lasted about half an hour and now we can't wait to meet DD3, she has her name and drawers full of little pink things waiting on her, the DDs are delighted they are getting another sister and ask every day when she is coming out.

boys are NOT more gentle and more loving

children are gentle and loving

or not, as the case may be

I understand we want to reassure the op but dont let this turn into a boys are better than girls thread

methinks that will never happen enid

Don't too much into what the tech said. Mine told me dc2 was a girl and I was so happy I started buying dresses. Well at the 20 week scan was told dc2 was going to ds2. Was in labor still hoping for a girl.

Needless to say boys are awesome!!