Giving my son a 'girl' name

[Bowa]

I am due soon to give birth soon to my first child who will be a boy. I struggled to think of any boy names that felt right. I had a long list for girl names, but I couldn't think any for if I had a son.

I found out I was having a boy at my 16 weeks scan and I still couldn't find a name that felt right at the time. Kinda like a missing puzzle piece if that makes sense.

A few weeks later, I was thinking about a movie I loved since childhood and one of the main characters (the character is male) and something clicked and I knew that was the name I wanted for my son. It felt perfect and exactly what I was looking for. I became excited and looked into how I could make things with his name for the nursery, nicknames and that.

I haven't told anyone what name I picked out for him as I wanted to get everything ready beforehand. I have also had some 'complications', so it felt like bad luck if I told people his name before he was born. When I'm by myself, I talk to my son and I will use his name then.

I was looking at something and saw the name I picked for my son. It had a few different spellings, but what stuck out was that apparently it's used more as a girl name. It didn't say anything about it being a unisex name. I assumed because the character who had the name was male (and refers to himself as a male) that it was wasn't a girl's name or maybe it could be a unisex name. Even the way it is pronounced sounds more masculine than feminine.

I feel conflicted. I can't think of any other name that feels right for him (he has middle names that are boy names), but I don't want him to be picked on if people knew it was used more for a girl. I have an unusual first name, so I have experiences with people not spelling it correctly or pronouncing it right.

His name isn't common for this area either, so I don't think anyone would assume it is used more as a girl name and the way it is pronounced is easy.

I know people have named their daughter with names that are more boy/unisex sounding like: Blake, Parker, Dylan, Toni etc.

His name isn't like: Daisy, Penelope, Sophia, Jane etc.

Would it be OK to stick with the name even if it's used more for a girl?

Is it Bob?

I loved the name Avery when I was pregnant with my son but it was quite a popular girl's name at the time (10 years ago) and I found that really off putting so I went for a different name.

@OhWhistleFair enough. No boy Priyas or Vidyas registered in the UK, though-just girls. And no girl Jermaines! Must be different where you are.

Impossible to say without knowing the name.

Potiphar? Am sure its Potiphar.

Hard to tell without the name being mentioned, but I can imagine the boy being laughed at at school if he's sharing the name with his female classmates, sadly.

I'm in the UK! Let's not talk about Vijay / Vijaya either.

The bearded labourer at the top in this snap of the Piltdown dig had the charming name Venus Hargreaves.

Now I'm stuck with Johnny Cash singing 'A boy named Sue' in my head 🤦.

OP maybe have a listen of that song

A female relative called Kim moved to Norway and discovered Kim is exclusively a male name there.

Why spend so much time explaining and then not give the name!?! 🙄🙄

I'm enjoying the names coming in
but ought to quit this thread as I come from parallel nameworld apparently

If the film you watched had a boy called XXX then there will be other boys called that name, I'm sure.
The name is maybe now also used for girls.

Perhaps there is one spelling that is more a boys' spelling.
Why don't you share the name?

Kay?

Me looking for the name before I give my opinion

Some people are weird about these things.

I posted the other day saying I liked the name Alexander and might shorten it to Lexi.

A lot of people couldn't cope with that because Lexi is more of a girls' name.

Whether you avoid this type of thing really depends if you think your child will/ should be bothered by other people's opinions.

He will undoubtedly come across people who will tell him he has a girls' name, at some point in his life. It depends if you mind about him having that as a thing to deal with in his life or not.

Personally I wouldn't mind because my child will grow up with the values that it really doesn't matter what narrow minded people think, and the way we respond to that nonsense is to ignore it.

It does partly depend on the name though - I know an Alexander who shortens to Lexi and I know it's uncommon but not unheard of. He would also have the option to override that as he gets older and be Alex if he wanted, so he does have options.

Something much more traditionally feminine like Daisy, Louise etc would be more problematic.

Avery is a set of scales to me!

I really wouldn’t. It’s much easier for girls to pull off boys name than the other way round. Why saddle your son with the possibility of years or ridicule. Imagine dreading someone asking you what your name is? Don’t do it.

One of my children has a unisex name, ive only come across one other and they were also male though so it’s relatively uncommon.
i went to to school with a male Jodie when I had only come across girls with the name before. He wasn’t picked on, was one of the ‘cool’ kids. If it’s a name that is genuinely used for both I doubt anyone will bat an eyelid, kids are getting called all sorts now with some very interesting ways to spell them…

It depends what the name is!!! Catherine - yes, sounds like a girl, but there are many unisex names like Kim, Alex, Courtney, etc that could be either. I chose those names because I know boys/men with all of them.

Indiana isn't pronounced indy-anna, it's indy -arna.
So how can it be used as a girl's name?

What happens if you have a second boy, @Bowa ?
How will you name it if this mysterious name if the only one you want for a boy?

Pat?

FFS @Bowa unless you tell us the name, this thread is zero use to you.

I’m going with Cody/Kodie

Personally, I'd err on the side of caution. I wouldn't give a boy, a girlie name.