Giving my son a 'girl' name

[Bowa]

I am due soon to give birth soon to my first child who will be a boy. I struggled to think of any boy names that felt right. I had a long list for girl names, but I couldn't think any for if I had a son.

I found out I was having a boy at my 16 weeks scan and I still couldn't find a name that felt right at the time. Kinda like a missing puzzle piece if that makes sense.

A few weeks later, I was thinking about a movie I loved since childhood and one of the main characters (the character is male) and something clicked and I knew that was the name I wanted for my son. It felt perfect and exactly what I was looking for. I became excited and looked into how I could make things with his name for the nursery, nicknames and that.

I haven't told anyone what name I picked out for him as I wanted to get everything ready beforehand. I have also had some 'complications', so it felt like bad luck if I told people his name before he was born. When I'm by myself, I talk to my son and I will use his name then.

I was looking at something and saw the name I picked for my son. It had a few different spellings, but what stuck out was that apparently it's used more as a girl name. It didn't say anything about it being a unisex name. I assumed because the character who had the name was male (and refers to himself as a male) that it was wasn't a girl's name or maybe it could be a unisex name. Even the way it is pronounced sounds more masculine than feminine.

I feel conflicted. I can't think of any other name that feels right for him (he has middle names that are boy names), but I don't want him to be picked on if people knew it was used more for a girl. I have an unusual first name, so I have experiences with people not spelling it correctly or pronouncing it right.

His name isn't common for this area either, so I don't think anyone would assume it is used more as a girl name and the way it is pronounced is easy.

I know people have named their daughter with names that are more boy/unisex sounding like: Blake, Parker, Dylan, Toni etc.

His name isn't like: Daisy, Penelope, Sophia, Jane etc.

Would it be OK to stick with the name even if it's used more for a girl?

This person obviously doesn't want to tell you the name, so it was a waste of time posting on here

What would anyone call a boy Ellie-Mai??

Totally!!
I was thinking Jesse. I like that for a boy

I do (re your post of yesterday at 23.51) 😀

Agree. Absolutely pointless. And annoying.

Yes, I found the same problem with boy names. My son is 6 now, has a unisex name and wears his hair long. He looks like me and gets mistaken for a girl (most likely as I am and he resembles me closely). People ask if he’s a boy or girl sometimes, including children (they may be trying a more subtle way of working it out by asking his name but the find it doesn’t help).

No one has teased him ever. If your son prefers he can be referred to by his middle name anyway.

Seems to me, you have just posted this to wind people up.

Is it Father Stig Bubblecard?

The first thing that came to my mind was the song by Johnny Cash 'A boy named Sue' 😂

To be fair I have know a couple of boys/men that go by Ellie, short for Ellis/Ellison (either as a nickname of first or surname) and also a boy named Ely (actually pronounced Ee-lie but often misread as Ellie).

I went to school (uk) with a boy Kelly. Teachers always looked for a girl. He was teased...

Is it possible when parents give their child a unisex name they tend towards a preference for having a child of the opposite sex & if it doesn't happen the next best thing is a name suited to both boys & girls 🤔

Whats deemed 'unisex' is subjective though based on experience, social exposure and culture.

Like in Italy you literally cannot call a girl Andrea, in many countries Sasha is masculine but in America I have heard people say names like Dylan, Ryan and Logan are unisex (even if name like Ryan literally mean 'King'). I have only met 3 Levi's in my life all where girls born in the 90s (but its factually a masculine name).

My kids name is a straight up masculine name, has been throughout history, all around the world its just wasn't very common in the UK. People assuming it sounds feminine because it ends with an 'a' sound does not magically make it a girls name and them miss-assuming that I must have wanted a girl is ridiculous. I absoloutly wouldn't have used it on a girl. My son is named after a strong male historic figure.

@housethatbuiltme
Off the point I know, but it’s unlikely Ryan literally means king and that etymology has been discounted by scholars, though you’ll often see it mentioned on baby name sites.

It comes from the Irish Rian (Ree-an) and the name is so old its meaning has been lost and remains unknown.

What 'scholars'?

Guessing they aren't Irish and you don't speak Gaeilge.

'Ri' literally just means king, its a word based name.

Saying its unknown is like an non English speaker saying 'Our researchers say we have no idea if Holly relates to a tree or if Summer has anything to do with seasons'.

Kelly is a surname in Ireland.
Perhaps it was his mother’s surname ?

Ri does not mean king, rí does.

The accent (fada) makes a huge difference.

Briste is broken, bríste are trousers.
Seán is a man’s name, sean is old.
Fear is a man, féar is grass.

MacLysaght is one source if you want to check.

@housethatbuiltme

This discussion gives a synopsis if you’re interested.
http://irishlanguageforum.com/viewtopic.php?f=28&t=6007

The surname Ó Riain is always spelt without a fada on the i or a.

Fair enough.
I haven't come across any males who go be Ellie and I know an Ellis. He's Ellis lol

Esme?