Sept 2024 - Thread 9!

[SpicyMoth]

Continuation from the previous thread before it fills up - we're getting so close ladies, ahhhhh!!!

Previous thread here; https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/pregnancy/5094920-september-2024-thread-8?page=39&reply=136855271

@longingtobe23 i am in a similar position although not to do with placenta but fibroids - i have one in an awkward position so will need a C-section depending on whether baby's head ends up below it or not - and also have scans scheduled at 32 and 36 weeks. the impression i have is that if he's already tucked under it at 32 weeks the c-section becomes less likely but, like you, we won't know for sure until 36. just have to try and be chill and open to all possibilities i guess... try being the operative word

@longingtobe23 @Xur

Thanks girls, I’ve been discharged now after my bp returned to normal and everything is looking within range. No medication as of yet, but I do have to have weekly midwife appointments now to monitor for pre e signs. Made me realise I’ve got to get my backside into gear and get my hospital bag sorted

Just catching up on the thread so I'm a little bit behind (sorry!).

On the subject of guests after birth, I'm also feeling pretty stressed about it. I'm such a people pleaser and hate to upset/offend anybody but DH will only have a maximum of 2 weeks leave, and I'd really like that time to be spend as the three of us, bonding and soaking up everything. We went through IVF to get pregnant so I'm fully aware we might not ever get to experience it again, and I'd hate to think that those first few newborn weeks were spent trying to host/entertain and please other people!

@rupertbear91 My parents also asked about our plans for Christmas the other day and I said we would likely spend it at home as baby will only be 3 months old and it'll be our first Christmas as a family of three. My mum said "Ok so we (her, dad, siblings etc) will come over to you. I told her not to expect Christmas dinner because there's absolutely no way I'm hosting Christmas with a 3 month old baby! 🤣

@malimoon yes that’s where I am struggling ; baby has to do two things now for me, push placenta 2cm or higher and then flip from transverse to head down 🤞🏻 4 weeks until I find out I guess…as you say remain calm and positive but also making sure bag is fully packed over here 😂

@Emmaev glad you’ve been discharged okay, fingers crossed the checks weekly will let you get to the gestation you’d like best 🤞🏻🤞🏻 you got this!

@Babyplease23 I was hopeful for a nice quiet Christmas my sister and sis in law also having/had babies this year and I didn’t want to fight for either set of parents (which I know we are lucky to have) - but I want a nice quiet calm peaceful one please. So frankly, they can have them ha! I adore Christmas and the season before and I don’t want to end up in tears 3 months post baby 😂 x

Glad to hear you’re okay @Emmaev ❤️ The high bp readings are enough to get your bp going even higher aren’t they? It’s like a vicious cycle 🫠😂 glad it calmed down though and you’re not stil in triage! Keeping everything crossed that miss eclampsia doesn’t rear her ugly head in this pregnancy for you

I’m feeling a bit anxious myself 😭 I had a follow up scan yesterday as I had reduced movements on Saturday, and they said all good except amniotic fluid is on the “higher end of normal” so, got to have it monitored at my 36 week scan on the 8th. I had polyhydramnios with my first and I’m pretty sure having this makes you high risk no? I will be so so gutted if I lose the chance of using the birth centre 😞

😬

@SC126 thank you ☺️ it more the nerves than anything!! I know I'll panic and cry so much on the day and during procedure.

@RosiePH my god, you could be describing me!! Scared of anything medical. Makes me ball my eyes out and panic. I'm also doing it for anxiety/control reasons as don't like the unknown.
I'm ok with injections and bloods but am terrified of the cannula and catheter. Although I've heard the latter is absolutely fine.
I'm also scared of being sick and do anything in my power to prevent this through life.
I didn't request the meeting but the consultatant referred me.

It's went really well, she was lovely and assured me lots of women are highly anxious about it. Unlike the male consultant who told me no one was 🤬

Yes I've thought about doing the course and follow them on instagram. The anaesthetist gave me a link for videos/information to maybe save me spending £100. I still might do it to desensitise myself.

@Caroline2023 same here, no date yet! Which is unsure if helpful or unhelpful in managing anxiety.

@WinsandSam It's went really well, she was lovely and assured me lots of women are highly anxious about it. Unlike the male consultant who told me no one was 🤬

I don’t want to generalise but wtf is wrong with male consultants?? I only ever hear bad things about them. Mine last week told me in worst case scenarios the issue they’d found with me that day “might be fatal” then started laughing?! And then joked about actually all I need to do is eat a sandwich - when the whole reason I have a consultant is because I have GD! When my sister was pregnant with her second, she wanted a C-section and her male consultant told her because she has a pacemaker that she’d be more likely to bleed out and die on the table! She was distraught because she thought “well what if I need an emergency section, is my last thought going in that I’ll never meet my baby and leave both of the children motherless?” Then she spoke to her midwife in absolute floods of tears who said that was utter nonsense and got referred to a new, female consultant who confirmed that he had been talking out of his arse and was probably just trying to lower the number of C-section referrals.

What is wrong with them?!

@Lillers it's reassuring to know it's not only my experience.
He was a pig and I came out crying! Basically told me off for wanting a section and a bit like your sister, was told how I'd likely need a blood transfusion, damage to my bladder etc. didn't once talk about risks of vaginal birth/instruments/induction/emergency section. He told me other women aren't anxious for their section. Absolutely BS! I almost asked him he he had a vagina, and if not he has no right to give me his opinions. I just froze and balled my eyes out after

I also told my midwife- funny she knew who I meant and told me to put in a complaint.

I'm sorry you also had a terrible experience. Bloody men 🤬

@Lillers @WinsandSam funnily I had a bad experience at my first consultant appointment however they were female. I asked for sterilisation during my c section and they asked me my age (33 so not young or old by any means) and told me to consider other options because what if something happened to this baby and I wanted another! I couldn’t believe it. Then last week I had a different consultant (female again) and she was so lovely. Was happy to put through my requests!

Shocking really! Some of these men and women are clearly in the wrong jobs as have zero compassion or tact

@SC126 What the hell! That’s so inappropriate!

I had the same a few weeks ago with my female consultant she is lovely and listens to me normally but she just terrified me with all the stats of death/loosing my bowl and all sorts last time I came out dreading what's to come. I don't know why she did it

sadly men often talk out of their cornholios. I work in a manly sector, with primarily men. You should see the amount of bs they speak out when they feel confident enough. I have grown to have a reasonable amount of prejudice when a man is about to speak up about something they wouldn’t be able to know of due to their equipment (periods, pregnancies, hormonal issues, birth giving) etc.

I have entered a stage of absolute laziness, I did nothing all day today. I played video games, ate and then had a 2h long nap. Now I’m about to get out of the bed and go back video gaming.

If I am being totally honest my biggest fear is the lack of effect of anaesthesia. I really hope I can endure without an epidural. I am quite resistant to it. When I go to the dentist it always takes forever to kick in and I need more than a normal person. For this I am extremely scared of having a C section. I would like to end up in a scenario not requiring intravenous anaesthesia. If anyone ever plays that down to me I will full send them to fuck off land. I already once had a dentist pull a tooth without it as a child because they didn’t believe me when I said it wasn’t working.

This really is nothing but I'm annoyed at myself so going to have a moan on here about it. Bloody never iron, I hate it and would usually get someone to do it. Today I couldn't wait because my new bedroom curtains had arrived and it was baking hot so I stood and did them in my bra and knickers... and caught my tummy! So now I have a stupid little line across it and it stung like a b*stard when I got in the shower grrr!

35 weeks today! 🥳 I've put on 1st 3lbs so far, I actually weighed in earlier, been meaning to for ages.

@Xur it always makes me smile when you put about video gaming. What is it that you play? What a way to wind down and chill. I'm so out of touch with that kind of stuff.

@MudandMoet you have it almost at the same place like I did when I ran into the door handle the other week 😂 I was so pissed off with myself, I also knocked off cup from the coffee machine the other day because I don’t feel my dimensions.
And today I broke a glass bowl because my husband was tickling me and I was afraid of hitting my belly against the counter (I was washing it) so I dropped the bowl and it chipped 😂

https://medal.tv/games/apex-legends/clips/ikmGWTShjuBKhpnWQ/k7OOmlx3qQe3?invite=cr-MSxSNkIsMjU0MzA1MjYwLA

thus is me gaming 😂 this is what I play, it’s a proper wind down 😂

Fundal height measurements (the belly measure) are estimates. As you can imagine, using a measuring tape to measure where they believe to be the top of the womb down to where they believe to be the pelvic bone, there is a lot of room for error. It’s also not intended to be an accurate measurement of baby, you can have a smaller fundal height measurement and a larger measuring baby depending on position/amniotic fluid and lots of other factors. Hence, if there are any concerns re fundal height measurements, a drop in centiles for example, they send you for a growth scan to investigate further. And even then, growth scans aren’t an exact science either! My first baby was on the 90th cent one according to growth scans but was born on the 50th.
I just wanted to reassure you that your midwife hadn’t “messed up”.

@Bigowleyes totally get that not my first rodeo with the scenario I guess - I had a son estimated on 50th and actually popped out 98th he’s been off the scale ever since
I just totally dislike them as they cause unnecessary worry! She was flapping like I’d need a scan for size, fluid, further diabetes tests etc
I felt like I didn’t need to leave feeling worried and check today proved I didn’t so in my eyes it was a bit silly to cause the worry!
So granted not her fault it measured the way it did but very much could have handled differently. If I was first time I would have felt more anxious!

The fundal height thing is a little bit silly, isn’t it? It’s 2024 and we’re using one measurement down the midline of a bump with a measuring tape 😂 as said, all it takes is for baby to be lying off to the side and the midline to be a bit flatter, and bam - panic. You’d think they’d at least take multiple measurements after asking you to move around or something. There has to be a better way!

I don’t vibe with my midwife at all, and a different (lovely) midwife sent me for a growth scan 3 weeks ago.. all fine, fundal height was 31cm and they said if I didn’t hit 34cm next time I’d be referred back. Fast forward to this week with my actual midwife, she measures me (not knowing what hosp had said) at 33cm so I told her what they’d said, and she instantly remeasured me and got 34cm so told me I was fine, no need for referral 🫠

I can’t imagine what that attitude and experience would’ve done to my head the first time round!

@tryingfortwo2 thats it in a nut! I truly think the way they’re used is perhaps the messed up part ha! As it can really make you uneasy, but in reality they are just a guide.
So I totally get not their fault it does seem outdated but also, learn how to deliver the information in a nice way to not make us preggos panic 😂😮‍💨 we have enough going on!

Apologies for the topic change, but does anyone know if "coning" definitely means you have diastasis recti or not?

I asked my midwife if my pointy looking tummy shape when sitting up was normal and she just said yes and seemed very unbothered and didn't even mention DR, but after googling it's apparently a sign??

My midwife is very nice and sweet and I like her a lot but I'm not gonna lie, she doesn't do very much re; actually informing me of things as a first-timer it seems?
I only learned about pre-eclampsia possibilities w/ my other symptoms from these threads for example! >.<

@SpicyMoth I’m not an expert but I think it happens to most of us, as our abs have to seperate to accommodate the baby? I don’t think it’s too much to worry about until after birth, and then it can be confirmed how much separation there is by using your fingers. Correct me if I’m wrong! I’m sure I listened to a podcast episode about it over the weekend (this’ll show how much attention I paid lol)

https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/midwife-pip-podcast/id1524209425?i=1000641674133 It’s only 13 mins long

Tysm @HRP1990 I'll give it a listen in the bath after dinner! <3 <3
Finding accurate information is super difficult these days - especially as a first timer who has no basis for anything to begin with!! <3
MN and these threads have honestly been lifesaver, huge thanks to absolutely every one of you!! <3

You’re welcome 🫶🏼 I’m usually into a crime podcast lol but I’m having to switch up my listening with something more purposeful now it’s getting closer to due date! The lady who hosts the podcast is a midwife, and it’s a fairly easy listen, so you might pick up alot of factual information listening to her x