Did your partner come to your later midwife appointments?(34 weeks and beyond)

[Lou98x]

I am 32 weeks pregnant at the moment, and up until now my husband has been at my two scans, and came with me for my GTT (as I didn’t want to be alone and bored!), but none of my regular appointments with the midwife. How beneficial would it be for him to attend my 34 week appointment and beyond? My understanding is that the midwife will start talking about birth and preparing for that, so think it’s important he knows how that’s going to work too! Did your partner attend any later appointments?

no appointments except scans

no biggie for me / us

we did nct though so that’s where he learned more about birth etc

Just the scans and booking in for us. DH picked up much more from NCT than he would have at midwife appts.

My husband didn't come to my appointments. He came to the booking appointment with the first baby because it was all new and we didn't know what to expect but after that he had to work. I could pass on any information to him that I thought he should know and he asked me lots of questions as well. He did come to the antinatal classes though which were held in the evenings. That was a lot of birth prep so we had it covered.

My husband came to 12 week scan and 20 week scan, he didn't attend any of the 4 growth scans I was sent for either (all planned ones)
I find midwife appointments would have been a waste of his time.

Mine only came to the scans. He couldn't keep taking time off work.
We did antenatal classes in the evenings.

My midwife appointments were short and she didn't discuss birth with me - my husband came to the 16 week midwife appointment so he could hear the heart beat but none after that.

Thanks everyone! We had tried to book on the free ‘bump to baby’ classes near us but they were in the mornings during the week and we both work full time! Might have a look into NCT and see if they have anything near us…

I don't remember seeing a midwife until after the birth.

But he missed the first scan and the birth and her first week because he works away.

For our second he missed both scans but was there for the birth.

First time round he sometimes did if it was convenient (end of the day, excuse to leave work slightly early!) I found the 'birth choices' bit fairly mundane. I said what I had planned (discussed with DH prior) and she said sounds good. That was about it. I wouldn't get him to go out his way for it.

No… he didn’t.

our hospital was inordinately slow and had zero WiFi / internet reception each appointment was basically half a day of work.

we wanted to “use up” employer good will after the baby.
we did NCT but it was all fairly useless except for the BRIAN decision making bit which was a good reminder for DH

Ohh you mean the classes?? Sorry. No he didn't.

Seems that it would be pretty pointless having him come along! Thanks everyone x

12 & 20 wk scans, yes. Regular mw check ups, no.

Same

He came to my three scans (extra one for a particular check), and my C-section booking appointment was after the 20 week scan so he was there for that too, but no, he didn’t come to any of my midwife appointments. I just told him what he needed to know and let him have any notes to read through at home in the evening.

The mw appts are to check on you and the baby. He could come along if he has a specific question or you feel you need advocacy or support but really the appointments are to check on your health and well-being and that of your baby. They are also a good opportunity for healthcare professionals to ensure pregnant women are safe at home and having husbands/boyfriends/partners tagging along to every appointment can hinder that.

He did because we live across the road from the doctors surgery and he was working from home, so was no bother to pop out for 30 mins and make it up later in the workday.

There was no need though, he mostly just sat there. He did enjoy hearing the heartbeat though

No appointments at all. He was at the birth though.

Lord no. He was working and it was a routine medical check. Midwives aren't teachers, they don't explain the birth process. If you want to be fully briefed on that you need to read up yourselves or do a class.

My husband has been to the 2 scans and the 34w midwife appointment as that was the one that we discussed/wrote the birth plan. No plan to come to any others

You ought to be able to get time off for antenatal classes www.citizensadvice.org.uk/work/maternity-and-parental-rights/check-your-maternity-and-parental-rights/rights-while-pregnant-or-on-maternity-leave/rights-while-youre-pregnant-at-work/#:~:text=While%20you're%20pregnant%20you,re%20entitled%20to%20maternity%20leave.

I think mine came to most of my appointments the first time round. Subsequent pregnancies it was just the scans and the birth.

He only came to the scan , no other appointments.

I don't think my husband came to any as was working (maybe odd exception on annual leave) . It's totally up to yourself and your own circumstances. My mum came to some of my later ones. Hope your pregnancy is going well op.