Hiding pregnancy at Christmas Party??

[Thriving30]

Hi all just looking for some advice.
I've recently found out I'm pregnant (very early stages still). I have worked out I will be about 12 weeks at my work's christmas party. I put my name down & paid the deposit weeks ago.

I can't really 'get out of it' because I pulled out last year stating personal reasons (I actually had an MC and as you can imagine wasn't in the mood to celebrate anything) - Nobody at work is aware of this - so I will look really antisocial and weird if I don't go this year.

I really don't want anyone knowing at that stage, including family until I'm sure everything is OK with this pregnancy, as I've had two MC's in the past.

I do like my alcohol and have been out with colleagues regularly throughout the year, drinking, and we have already talked about doing shots etc (obviously before I knew I was pregnant!) so I have no idea how I'm going to avoid drinking!

Please can anyone give me some tips/advice? I'm thinking of ordering lemonade or something so it's not obvious? But I think they give a glass of fizz on arrival!

Be obvious with your non-alcoholic drinks and tell people you’re on antibiotics. They’ve no need to know why but prehaps in the run up you could be feeling rundown? Or have an infected tooth requiring antibiotics? 😉

Ask for lemonades in a gin glass when you’re at the bar, and tell people you’re only drinking gin (and nothing else, hence rejecting the welcome drink!) because mixing your drinks always makes you ill.

I managed three weddings using the lemonade in a gin glass tactic and nobody was any the wiser! Just be careful not to drink it too quickly as it goes down easier without alcohol in it!

Don't use the antibiotics excuse, you may as well be flying a flag announcing your pregnant. I'd just try and order your own drinks and pretend you're having spirits and mixers.
Or say money is tight so you've got a flask of gin/vodka in your bag and you're only paying for soft drinks!

Don't use antibiotics as an excuse it makes it so obvious as there's only a handful of antibiotics you can't really drink on.
Drive there and then you can't drink

Last works night out we had someone who was pregnant and hadn’t told anyone yet. She bought her own drinks, said no if people tried to buy her a drink and no one suspected anything, if someone bought her a drink she left it lyin on random parts of the table and no one questioned it.

you could also say to one of the bar staff and get them to serve you all night. (Dd had a customer at her work a few weeks ago who had spoken to dd on the side and explained the situation.)

Could you just drive there?

No reason to make up lies about antibiotics. People only ever do that when pregnant. If your colleagues are normal, polite people, they won't dream of demanding to know if you're pregnant, even if they suspect. Order your own drinks and don't start telling stories about why tonight you can't possibly drink. I spend almost no time wondering what people have in their glasses until they start talking about antibiotics and blushing.

If handed a glass of alcohol on arrival, say thank you and then lose it later.

That would seem to be the simplest solution.

Take the welcome drink, take a tiny sip (or pretend to), hold it and shortly after go to the loo, put it down en route and then forget to pick it up.

Then if it’s wine on the table either “try” it and pretend it’s not to your taste, or say you’re really off wine and go to the bar and get plain tonic or similar. No one will actually care/notice just don’t draw attention to it. If anyone does get weird and accuses you of not drinking, just say you have been but didn’t feel like a v heavy night/why are they policing your drink anyway!

The bar staff are your friend here. Ask for lemonade/sparkling water made to look like g&t. Same glass, ice and lime. Or a non-alcoholic cocktail in a martini glass. Or alcohol free beer in a glass.

Always have a glass in your hand, even if you don’t drink anything from it. Just casually leave it on the side and grab another one. Wasteful but…

Would you consider confiding in one person and asking them to help cover you? I did this (they had guessed) and they were super helpful at switching glasses round so it wasn’t so obvious I wasn’t touching the wine at dinner.

I also had a “big family event” the day after so couldn’t go crazy or stay out too late.

I had to buy a new outfit, everything I had suitable for a party showed a small but definite bump. I think I was 14 weeks by then.

Just drive there- plenty if reasons why you are doing that.
Picking someone up after/ saving money at christmas by not using public transport/ got to be up early the next day/ not been feeling well so may need to leave early etc etc etc

Take the glass of fizz and pretend to sip or for a while as you mingle then lose it. Take a glass of wine again pretend to sip it. If you can wander round to chat between courses take it with you and lose it again. Then go to the bar and get a tonic and say you just fancied a gin or whatever. Try not to get into a round. Say you want to buy your own drinks as you had a night out recently and got really hammered drinking rounds so you want to make sure you are okay this time. Also say you have something on the next morning and need to not be hungover.

Even if someone thinks you are pregnant they’re unlikely to straight out ask in my experience. I would just order soft drinks and if anyone asks say you’re driving or that you need to be up early. I don’t think you need to overthink it.

Just say you have another party afterwards or need to pick a relative up from somewhere so need to drive. Wear a longish floaty top and stretchy jeggins so it looks like you have tight jeans on. Congratulations on your pregnancy.

I’ve not drank many times and not mentioned it to my friends who’ve just assumed I’m drinking as I like to have a laugh and a dance.
I ask for orange juice and lemonade in a sparkling wine glass and make it last a long time so people don’t hear me ordering it at the bar.
Re the welcome drink I’ve never been anywhere where a non alcoholic drink isn’t offered, grab one of those and say you overdid it the night before or you don’t like the alcohol served.

I agre with others, the antibiotics excuse just sounds like a lie. I’d drive if you can, and make an early exit without saying any goodbyes. Get tonic or lemonade in a highball, it’ll look like gin and tonic.

Also for the welcome drink you can just hold it and not drink it, just discretely put it down somewhere if you don’t want to look obviously drinking the alcohol free alternative.

This SIL was pregnant last Christmas and successfully concealed like this.

Sure antibiotics can sound like a lie. But people really do have to take them, and really aren't able to drink on some (metronidazole, specifically).

I went to a wedding with the last dregs of a tooth abcess, and didn't even have a sip of the champagne for the toast - no one questioned it.

Yeah, some good tactics here. Holding a drink, no one will notice whether you actually drink it or not. The “gin” is a good idea!

The worst thing you can do is make a fuss and announce things about antibiotics and not drinking alcohol. Everyone will know.

Take the free fizz on arrival and pretend to sip it, then put it down somewhere when nobody is looking.

Go to the bar yourself and ask for lemonade in a gin glass or 'vodka and coke' minus the vodka. Always have a full on hand so nobody can offer to get you one.

I hate shots and if anyone buys me one I tip it into a plant pot or try and discreetly hide it. My friends tend to get jäger bombs so I can get away with agreeing to sip it until I can discretely dispose of it. Waste of money but they won't be told to stop it

Definitely don’t use the antibiotic excuse - as others have said, you may as well announce a pregnancy! When I’ve been in this situation I’ve carried the same glass of wine round all night +/- tonic water. If it’s a busy party people probably won’t even notice you’re not drinking unless you draw attention to it.

Accept the fizz on arrival. Just hold it in your hand. Take a small sip if you want to. No one will notice. Then just put it down somewhere and order a tonic water.

Lime and soda looks exactly the same as vodka, lime and soda. I just said I was dieting so was sticking to vodka and not getting into rounds if anyone asked, but tbh after a few drinks, everyone gets too drunk to notice

I did very similar at our summer party. I ordered lemonade but asked the bar tenders to put it in a round gin glass and nobody knew it wasn't a gin and tonic.