Fairy lights in birth hospital bag?

[crumblylancs]

Can someone tell me if this is the new normal? My tiktok is full of pregnancy videos, including women packing their hospital bags with fairy lights/battery operated tea lights for during labour.

I can't imagine getting in to delivery and trying to get a load of fairy lights hung up

The hospital I recently gave birth at put them out for us and those battery operated tea lights, lights git dimmed and they had a blue tooth speaker available for use as well. This is standard practice at this hospital, happen for both times I was there.

I suggest bringing them if they help.

The problem is your risk of blood clots is much higher during and immediately after pregnancy, so staying in bed is about the worst thing you can do

Yes, research Hypnobirthing. I took battery powered fairy lights and tea lights incase I had to go to the labour ward (the birth centre provided them). I did go to labour ward due to complications. Had a wonderful night in labour with an aeromatherapy machine going, lights off, spa music playing and fairy lights and candles. Lots of gas and air and chocolate

A week?

My best labour I had I spent majority of it at home looking after my children, cooking dinner and watching tele, then when it was time I went to the birthing centre and within 1 hour I'd given birth. I had a tens machine and some cocodamol. It was agony still but nice not to spend loads of time on a labour ward like the first 2 births.

I think everyone's different.

#1 - MLU - pool birth. Dim lighting, hypnobirthed, prepared a music playlist but told DH not to bother putting it on, didn't have fairy lights but I would have loved them if we had (it was just before the hospital/MLU started promoting it as a "thing" and friends who have given birth there since have said that the hospital now have fairy lights and LED candles in every room for use if desired). To be honest, the dim lighting in the room was enough for me at the time (and I obviously didn't know any different) but if the lights hadn't been dimmable it would have made a huge difference to have been able to change the atmosphere.

#2 - home - pool birth. I set up fairy lights to ensure dim lighting and relaxing surroundings and prepared another music playlist. Hypnobirthed. Baby was born in the daytime in daylight, which I was not happy about because I was looking forward to my beautiful fairy lit space! Yet again, I didn't use the music playlist ("noise" seems to bother me in labour).

#3 - planning another home birth with pool, hypnobirthing, fairy lights and a music playlist (ha)... really hoping I give birth at night this time round so that I can use the fairy lights (which are still up and look beautiful)! I'm realistic about the fact I'll probably not want the music though (third time lucky?), but nice to have the option... 🤣 I know that (provided I give birth at night) I'll very much want the fairy lights/tranquil lighting. One of my favourite relaxation activities is to have a candlelit bath, so it makes sense to me (along with the cocooning feeling of safety and warmth that soft lighting brings)...

In writing this I realise I've been incredibly lucky to have two really positive birth experiences so far. Perhaps if one/both of my births hadn't gone so well I might dismiss the above as "romantic nonsense", however I can really see the value in doing whatever you can to ensure that your surroundings are set up to ensure that you're in the best "headspace" possible. Each person's experience is unique and totally valid for them.

Personally, I can see the logic in the hypnobirthing theory that clinical settings and bright lighting aren't conducive to producing oxytocin or a calm atmosphere in which you can just "get on with it". I remember reading an article that quoted the Yorkshire Shepherdess as saying she gave birth to one of her children on her own in front of the fire and that sounds perfect to me (although, as much as I like the idea of getting on with it on my own, I'm too risk averse in reality, so having a midwife present seems very sensible).

There were fairy lights in my room when I gave birth. I could have cried when they got put on and I got in the pool.

I was induced and took a small led light in and glad I did. Hospital lights were really harsh and I was on the induction ward for 3 nights. Was nice to have soft lighting

I loathe fairy lights. Actually loathe them. My wedding venue wanted to charge £350 for ones that were permanently installed (but said they weren’t). I said I didn’t want them and to take them down. Then they threw them in “for free”. Because guess what, they’re a PIA to take down. I can’t imagine finding them at all relaxing.

I’m with others who have an in-out approach. Unfortunately I had complications which kept me in with both my births, the second time I asked for a side room as I absolutely refused to be on a shared ward. The ward is like some kind of living hell with people everywhere and, during visiting hours, like a crèche. For straightforward labours I don’t understand why you’d need visitors as you go home so quickly, if you need to stay: you need rest.

Aaah, what a wonderful birth experience that sounds!

I generally despise Tik Tok trends but this one actually sounds quite nice. I do love fairy lights - and so do my DC. My DS asked me a few days ago if we could have fairy lights up all year round when we move house (we're in the middle of preparing for a house move).

When I was pregnant, I went to hospital for a check up, was admitted overnight unexpectedly - and then I went into labour without anyone realising until I was almost fully dilated. And then it was an emergency C-section (twins).

My birth experience involved me having an ultrasound scan without knowing I was in labour, writhing around on the table with what I thought was a UTI spasm - with neither the radiologist or I knowing I was actually having contractions 😅

Ejecting a small person through your vagina - or out of the sun roof exit - is a painful experience. Women are absolute fucking warriors. Do whatever makes you happy. Bringing in fairy lights sounded a bit mad at first, but on reflection, if you have the chance to make a more relaxing environment to give birth in, then bloody marvellous!

😂😂😂

I think it's pretty typical now, even my midwife was suggesting lights, playlists and aromatherapy when I was preparing for DS1 and he's 10. I remember being fuming about aromatherapy oils being suggested because my 'morning' sickness lasted the whole pregnancy and was triggered by smells, she knew this. Even the conversation about them made me sick. So once I was fuming about that I was also ridiculing the idea of a playlist and lighting - I don't think I was entirely reasonable when I look back on this (understatement).

I think it's good to have items which can relax you and bring some comfort and familiarity when giving birth, even the straightforward births can be scary. My worry is really that 'influencers' are creating yet another situation to live up to when none of it is in our hands really. We can't control most aspects of giving birth, the more influencers go on about using x/y/z and how amazing their experiences were because of this, the more pressure it puts in women to be able to have these 'experiences'. This can lead to awful feelings of failure and almost loss when it doesn't happen - combine that with the usual hormone changes and just the general recovery from birth. It just feels like unnecessary pressure.

Lol at the older people having a dig that they "just got on with it " yeah after a weeks hotel, I mean hospital stay lazing around. God love em, they really do like to pretend they had it all so much worse. It's cute

It's more than a TikTok trend, there are serious studies in scientific journals that show how lower, less direct lighting (such as that given by fairy lights) can increase the secretion of oxytocin and favour relaxation.
That's why many hospitals have spent ££££ installing lighting dimmers and mood lighting in labour wards. It's because it makes clinical sense.
I agree with PP, can't believe that people are picking on some people's birth preferences. It's BIRTH, it's awful, whatever gets you through.

Agree. That's interesting about oxytocin. Makes sense though, we're animals: We need to feel safe for labour to progress.

10 years ago our NCT instructor was encouraging us to take in tea lights and aromatherapy oils, turn down the lights etc, so not that new. The reality was the only one of us who actually got them out and used them was the one person who had the 'ideal' NCT birth, laboured mostly at home and then pushed the baby out in a midwife-led unit. The rest of us were a little too preoccupied to even think about them!

Not fairy lights but I had egg lights which could change colour for both my births.

For both it helped because it relaxed me but especially with DS2 where the system had changed.
Our hospital (with the midwife led unit included) you had to go to triage first and then they would find you a space as it was very busy.....for me it was way too clinical a setting and my body just went nope and slowed everything down but I wasn't allowed to go home. They had a bath tub there so my DH ran me a bath and set the lights up and turned off the main light. Spent a long time in the bath, everytime I had to come out to go back to the triage bed to be checked my labour would stop!

Was offered a space on labour ward but declined as again knew it was too clinical a setting for me and pointless as I couldn't have any of the drugs anyway (except paracetamol).
As soon as I was in a birthing pool with my lights (and theirs!) around I progressed quickly and delivered DS2 in an hour.

There is a lot to be said for mum being relaxed and if women choose fairy lights then so be it! Ours in an old hospital that doesn't have the new light system

Not my thing personally but I can't see any harm in it. As long as you are in a private room with a birth partner so you are not disturbing anyone else or expecting a busy MW to set them up for you then why not? Why the need to mock other women's choices just because it is not what you did/would do?
And the people talking about staying in for a week must either be very old or live somewhere quite different to me. I'm in my late 50s with children in their 20s and 6 hour discharge after a straightforward birth, a day or so after an instrumental delivery and about 3 days after a section was pretty much the norm where I live. The only people I heard of staying for a week or more were really unwell.
I know my Mum was in for a week after I was born in the 60s but she didn't see it as a positive thing!

Yes me too and men knew their place in those days

Fairy lights would have looked very nice wrapped around my catheter bag.

I did stay in hospital after giving birth for five days. I was desperate to get home and jealous of those who got to go home quickly. The post natal ward is not a relaxing place and nurses harried us to get out of bed into the chair every morning.

😂😂

That made me smile..things are very different now- I was mortified that other women had juice and lucozade when I only had the water jug.

We offer them as standard in each of our rooms on labour ward apart from theatre, along with a dimmer for the main lights, gym balls, mats, and a docking station for music. People can be in labour for a long time - we like to make it feel less stark and clinical if we can.

bladebladebla1, you are completely wrong in your sneer at older mothers. I am 67, and when I had my two babies I was discharged home after 6 hours in both cases. No mothers had a week of lounging around. Even Caesarian patients only got a max of two days.
But none of us felt the need for fairy lights or hippy woo! I took a book in, and read it to distract me until I was nearly ready to deliver, when I put it down to have my hands free for the entonox.