I delivered my baby myself at home - AMA

[notyouraverageuser]

I only have positive things to say about my labour/birth, and with it also being a fairly unusual scenario I thought I'd offer to share some insight for anyone considering a home birth, or just anyone curious in general. So feel free to ask anything. :-)

Wow congrats! Did you plan to give birth at home?

Were you alone at the time?
Congrats on your baby by the way!

After I'd gotten over the first few weeks of panicking "there's absolutely no way I could endure a vaginal birth" and put an elective C section out of my head, yes I was dead set on doing it at home. I didn't have a lot of strong support for the decision; most people were at least apprehensive if not outright unsupportive. I was assessed for a home birth but it was literally Russian roulette by the shift as to whether it would be facilitated due to short staffing, and so even my midwife was very much of the "you're probably not going to have one" opinion.

It was just DP and I. Midwives did turn up but too late for the main event!

Were you concerned that you wouldn't know if things were going wrong and you or the baby could have been seriously impacted as a result?

Did you say before you were willing to do it alone? Were the midwives respectful of your choice when they did turn up? Did they do anything practical (afterbirth, stitches, etc)?

Do you get annoyed at people saying dp delivered the baby?

So you didn’t plan a “free birth”- you were failed by lack of community midwifery provision?

I’m glad it ended up being a really positive experience for you, but my arse is clenching at what could have gone wrong without a trained HCP in attendance.

Did it worry you that every day mothers and babies die during birth and its the most dangerous time of a woman's life?

Why did you decide to put your baby’s life at such high risk before they were even born?

Things going wrong such as what? If you can be more specific in what you would be concerned about I can provide a better answer.

I wanted a home birth but was prepared to go in if there were no community midwives available. As it happens, when I called, there was nobody but I laboured for a long time so they did get there 13hrs later, just as I was considering heading in. And thank goodness because things did take a bit of a turn.

I had the same for one of mine OP. Not going to crash your thread but good luck, you’ve already got the people who have decided you are super reckless (I know you aren’t, just as I’m not)

So you weren't alone. You had somebody with you.

I wasn't forthcoming to my midwife of my intention to freebirth if the homebirthing service were suspended at the time, no, as she'd never given me the impression she was particularly keen/supportive of home births anyway. Although to be clear I was never aiming to freebirth, the midwives just didn't make it in time.

@BouncingWorms Apologies I hit send too early.

The midwives who turned up were apologetic more than anything because they hadn't arrived sooner. As I say, I'd planned a home birth rather a free birth so as far as they concerned, it was all planned and it was just that it had progressed quicker than anticipated.

Nope, nothing practical was necessary. They weighed DC and filled out a load of paperwork, but that was really about all their input amounted to in the end.

No one's ever said that to be honest.

Me too! Feck.

Things going wrong such as what? If you can be more specific in what you would be concerned about I can provide a better answer.

Shoulder dystocia, cord prolapse, haemmoraging, baby not breathing, anything!

I wouldn't regard myself as having been failed. They had to travel 20 odd miles as well as calling into the local hospital to get some gas and air en route. If anything I perhaps should have called earlier but based on the advice as to at what point to call back (contractions 2-3 minutes apart), that ended up being too late.

DP and I are both HCPs so although not in a professional capacity, there was still someone medical there.

Firstly congratulations! And well done, you must be very brave!

What made you so adverse to going into hospital?
Would anything have made you change your mind on a home / free birth e.g. signs of a large baby, high blood pressure etc
Did you do any research on what to do for a free birth? Or was it really unplanned just because the mid wife didn’t get there in time.

Really interesting thread. It’s not something I would ever consider doing, but then I find the concept of giving birth in a pool in hospital a little too new age for me 😂

I was fully informed of the statistics regarding outcomes of home births and hospital births, and was happy with my choice if that answers your question?

I really think using contractions to time labour is outdated as with my back to back baby I never had more than 2 in 10 minutes.
By their advice I would have delivered at home naturally.

For context, I didn't put DC at any higher risk than was acceptable by the midwifery team, else I wouldn't have been approved for a home birth. Irrespective I was satisfied with the risks of a home birth rather than one in hospital, because they exist for both.

I'm both sorry you didn't get the experience you'd imagined, but glad it sounded like it all worked out for the best for you and DC. :-)