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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Original poster

Ladies pregnant at 44

28 replies

meetmeinthespring · 04/12/2022 22:48

Anyone?

TTC number 2. I'm 44, been trying for 10 months and feel time has run out sadly...

I'm using OPKs Clearblue 2 day. Got a face on Day 11 this month, DTD that night and after..

But 4 days out from period and I'm getting side cramp feels and general 😔

Conceived DD1 in 7 months and gave birth at 40...

Looking for hope but I don't know I've left it too late

OP posts:
HelloBunny · 04/12/2022 22:54

Got pregnant at 43 / birth at 44. Didn’t do any sticks or measure anything. Just had more sex. Made sure DH was in bed, even if neither of us was in the mood... Also, got in before ovulation as I finally realised I had short cycles. Think that made a difference.

Original poster
meetmeinthespring · 04/12/2022 23:11

@HelloBunny how long were your cycles ?
We're you trying for first or second?

My cycles are quite regular 24/25...
OPK have positive day 11 in the 2 day fertile Clearblue...

Did you DTD every other day after AF?
I'm thinking of not using OPK's I feel stressed and not sure they really help!

OP posts:
DaddyCool0 · 04/12/2022 23:12

This reply has been deleted

We have our doubts about this so it has been deleted by MNHQ while we take a look behind the scenes.

thejadefish · 05/12/2022 00:15

I fell pregnant with DC2 at about 44 and a half, baby arrived earlier this year after I turned 45. I had DC1 shortly before I turned 40. Both DC took a long time for me to conceive (years). I went for a fertility check up a couple of years into ttc DC2 because I wanted to know if I was kidding myself/was I too old. Dr said that I had a 1-2% chance of conceiving - lower odds than most women my age. I was devastated by the news and wrote myself off, but happy to say that I was wrong! Pregnancy was smooth and baby healthy. Keep trying and wishing you the best of luck xx

Original poster
meetmeinthespring · 05/12/2022 05:21

@thejadefish that's great to hear such a positive story 😊
What was the length of your cycle if you don't mind me asking..?
Did you take any vitamins or did your partner?
And if you knew your ovulation?
I think where I might be failing TTC number 3, apart from age!, im using ovulation strips to get a positive and then DTD... im overthinking it!
My cycle is regular enough...24 days...
Between day 11 and 14 might cover it...

OP posts:
Original poster
meetmeinthespring · 05/12/2022 05:22

Sorry mistyped ...TTC number 2 😀
3!!😆

OP posts:
thejadefish · 05/12/2022 08:08

@meetmeinthespring cycle was 28 - 31 days it varied slightly. I took folic acid (in L methylfolate form because its easier to absorb), ubiqinol (coenzyme Q10) and omega 3 for about a year but gave up 4 or so months before conceiving so not sure that they helped in the end. I took my basal body temperature every day to reassure myself that I was in fact ovulating (it's no good for ttc as you only find out that you ovulated after the fact - a positive OPK is no guarantee of ovulating from what I'd read). I also used OPKs but I suspect that it's best to start trying before it turns positive as I was successful when it was a day-ish before the positive OPK and work/tiredness/stress hadn't given us much opportunity that month. So I wonder if it takes me longer than average for the LH surge to make its way from my bloodstream through to the test. Good luck!

Original poster
meetmeinthespring · 06/12/2022 05:23

I think AF might be on the way 😔same symptoms with cramps...
Plus I got a parking ticket yesterday 😫
Have to have some positive news ..
How are you all going?

OP posts:
MintJulia · 06/12/2022 06:05

I fell pregnant at 44 & 5 months so it can happen.

Cycle was 28 days. I wasn't taking any vitamins or supplements.

DS was my first. Arrived full term and all well.

I'd been told a decade earlier that I couldn't have children (I'd lost an ovary and tube to a necrotic cyst) and had other problems. It was quite a surprise 😀

Original poster
meetmeinthespring · 06/12/2022 07:45

@MintJulia oh congratulations on your baby...that must have been so welcome news after such a long time and being told that!!!
That's fantastic!

I'm going to keep going ...I'm taking Blackmores complete pre pregnancy vitamins and using OPKs. Can't get on with temp testing as I never remember!

I use the Flo app to keep track of AF etc.
Cycles are 25 and pretty regular....

OP posts:
ReggaeRocks · 06/12/2022 07:55

I’m 43 and trying still, I only use the Flo app to track cycles, and take Proceive Max. Just DTD as much as we can, which I love anyway. Youngest is three.
I’m trying to lose a wee bit of weight as that’s supposed to up chances…oh, and my Nan was 49 when she had my Mum.

Bellesjp · 06/12/2022 09:49

Hi @meetmeinthespring not sure if you've looked into it but have you tried taking Ubiquinol? Its the active form of Coq10 and it's meant to help improve egg quality. It takes about 3 months of taking it to help since that's how long eggs take to mature

I'm not 44 but I did have trouble conceiving and had a few losses, I conceived about 4 months after starting it so can only say it helped, I used the one from natures best x

Original poster
meetmeinthespring · 06/12/2022 11:50

There's 60mg Coenzyme Q10 in the vitamins I'm taking daily now...but I'll look into that. Thank you.

OP posts:
Miraclebabi · 27/12/2022 18:50

We have just found out we are pregnant at 44 after 2 failed ivf. Keep going

FairlyIncognito · 27/12/2022 19:00

I got pregnant at 43 and my main advice would be really good nutrition (I watched a lot of videos on you tube by Nourish my Melanie (I think ) who is a nutritionist. I ate so well both before and during pregnancy and wonder how much it helped .

I also took food-derived supplements and later in pregnancy I also took choline

Mumtobbgb · 17/08/2023 19:49

in need of some advice please.
(Bit of a long story I’m afraid)

My partner and I are at opposites ends of wanting another child, I have 4 and 1 of them are his (4 year old) my partner desperately wants us to have another one but I’m 44 and feel I’m too old, plus the risks increase with age, our son is due to start school in sept and I’ve just completed my maths & biology GCSEs (better late than never) in hope of doing midwifery at uni next year.

When I told my partner my reasons he dismissed them as not proper reasons as lots of older women have children, he’s been quite persistent about it. In a heated discussion I told him “maybe I’d of considered if he was as hands on as I believed he would be” obviously that didn’t go down well and he took it that I think he’s a rubbish dad, which I don’t he’s great with our son, but back a few years he more a by stander at times when I needed support, we have talked about it and he agrees I might be partially right but I need to remember he lost his job during the baby years so was under a lot of stress!

Anyways few weeks have passed and I thought we were ok, then he hits me with
“ I’ve immaculated him by thinking his a bad dad, I’ve made him feel like a useless, good for nothing man etc. I don’t think he’s any of these things and I’ve told him that, but now he’s saying how he can love someone who thinks so little of him it’s not going to work between us, he’s completely shut down towards me, barely looks at me, one word answers to questions his spark towards me had dwindled and I need to get it back.

Will another baby relight his fire or will it bring resentment im so torn with what to do. My friends say no more kids and I’m inclined to agree but their biased everyone I talk to about this is biased.

Please help in anyway you can I don’t want to lose me or destroy our family xx

Sparks654 · 08/01/2024 22:41

HelloBunny · 04/12/2022 22:54

Got pregnant at 43 / birth at 44. Didn’t do any sticks or measure anything. Just had more sex. Made sure DH was in bed, even if neither of us was in the mood... Also, got in before ovulation as I finally realised I had short cycles. Think that made a difference.

That's interesting. My cycles have been getting somewhat shorter for the past year or so (I am 43), and I am hoping to TTC (recovering at the moment from poor health). I know it's a long shot, but your story gives me hope. Did you suffer any setbacks?

Sparks654 · 08/01/2024 22:47

Mumtobbgb · 17/08/2023 19:49

in need of some advice please.
(Bit of a long story I’m afraid)

My partner and I are at opposites ends of wanting another child, I have 4 and 1 of them are his (4 year old) my partner desperately wants us to have another one but I’m 44 and feel I’m too old, plus the risks increase with age, our son is due to start school in sept and I’ve just completed my maths & biology GCSEs (better late than never) in hope of doing midwifery at uni next year.

When I told my partner my reasons he dismissed them as not proper reasons as lots of older women have children, he’s been quite persistent about it. In a heated discussion I told him “maybe I’d of considered if he was as hands on as I believed he would be” obviously that didn’t go down well and he took it that I think he’s a rubbish dad, which I don’t he’s great with our son, but back a few years he more a by stander at times when I needed support, we have talked about it and he agrees I might be partially right but I need to remember he lost his job during the baby years so was under a lot of stress!

Anyways few weeks have passed and I thought we were ok, then he hits me with
“ I’ve immaculated him by thinking his a bad dad, I’ve made him feel like a useless, good for nothing man etc. I don’t think he’s any of these things and I’ve told him that, but now he’s saying how he can love someone who thinks so little of him it’s not going to work between us, he’s completely shut down towards me, barely looks at me, one word answers to questions his spark towards me had dwindled and I need to get it back.

Will another baby relight his fire or will it bring resentment im so torn with what to do. My friends say no more kids and I’m inclined to agree but their biased everyone I talk to about this is biased.

Please help in anyway you can I don’t want to lose me or destroy our family xx

I am late answering this and I hope things have settled for you, but just in case this is my penny's worth. It sounds like your partner is going through a crisis and is looking for an answer - and has projected a lot of that onto having a child. I am no pscychologist, it's just my opinion, but maybe he could sign up for the talking therapies offered by the NHS, or join Men's Shed and have a little bit of an outlet (seems like it's all being directed at you). I totally see why you are nervous of another child and may not want to go through the whole process again as you have other children, and the possible heartache that could happen if you were to have complications, so from my point of view, you should only consider it if it's 100% what you want as well, after all the mother is the one to carry the baby, feed etc. Hope things are going ok for you.

theleavesfall24 · 09/01/2024 06:12

@Sparks654 also following to see about short cycles...

I'm now 45 and having been TTC number 2 for nearly 2 years now. Had DD1 at 40.
My cycles went from 28/29 when I was 39 to 24/25 after that ...so from about 41 onwards...

I don't know about OPKs never used them.
Only took 7 months to conceive our first.
Maybe we are now too old 😟

Sparks654 · 09/01/2024 08:35

theleavesfall24 · 09/01/2024 06:12

@Sparks654 also following to see about short cycles...

I'm now 45 and having been TTC number 2 for nearly 2 years now. Had DD1 at 40.
My cycles went from 28/29 when I was 39 to 24/25 after that ...so from about 41 onwards...

I don't know about OPKs never used them.
Only took 7 months to conceive our first.
Maybe we are now too old 😟

No, don't say we're too old! We have to keep the hope. One optimistic thing I was reading was the following - although there is only a 5% chance per cycle, over the course of a year there's a 30% chance of pregnancy. The only thing being that of the eggs released only 10% are typically viable so some may be rejected by the body before implantation happens or lead the body to miscarry. I am not a fan of the idea of IVF but someone else on a PM was telling me that she took some kind of medication to make her ovulate more, and it helped her get pregnant at 43 (not via IVF).

Sparks654 · 09/01/2024 08:38

FairlyIncognito · 27/12/2022 19:00

I got pregnant at 43 and my main advice would be really good nutrition (I watched a lot of videos on you tube by Nourish my Melanie (I think ) who is a nutritionist. I ate so well both before and during pregnancy and wonder how much it helped .

I also took food-derived supplements and later in pregnancy I also took choline

Did you have any complications before you got pregnant or with the pregnancy itself. I don't have any kids but am wondering if I can try for a late baby at 43. I am worried though!

Sparks654 · 09/01/2024 08:40

thejadefish · 05/12/2022 00:15

I fell pregnant with DC2 at about 44 and a half, baby arrived earlier this year after I turned 45. I had DC1 shortly before I turned 40. Both DC took a long time for me to conceive (years). I went for a fertility check up a couple of years into ttc DC2 because I wanted to know if I was kidding myself/was I too old. Dr said that I had a 1-2% chance of conceiving - lower odds than most women my age. I was devastated by the news and wrote myself off, but happy to say that I was wrong! Pregnancy was smooth and baby healthy. Keep trying and wishing you the best of luck xx

That is amazing news! Did you suffer any miscarriages before? Yes I keep reading that stat as well. I have polyps which are causing trouble and delaying my ability TTC - but I am hoping that by March at the latest I will have the op to remove them.

Sparks654 · 09/01/2024 08:42

Miraclebabi · 27/12/2022 18:50

We have just found out we are pregnant at 44 after 2 failed ivf. Keep going

Congratulations, how was your pregnancy? I often hear that women get pregnant AFTER IVF. It's odd! IVF is supposed to be the thing that has a higher success rate.

thejadefish · 09/01/2024 09:51

@Sparks654 Hi! No, so far as I know I didn't suffer any miscarriages but my cycle ranged from 28-32 days so I wouldn't test until at least CD 34 should it get that far. My periods had also started getting lighter at about age 42 and although my egg reserve was fine & I didn't (& don't yet) suffer hot flashes etc I suspect it was the start of perimenopause. So long as you still have cycles you have a chance. I've heard about natural pregnancies after IVF too. I wonder (pure speculation of course) if it affects how things work afterwards maybe your womb lining is better able to support the implantation of the fertilised egg or something due to the hormones & medication you've taken. FWIW I don't think you're too old, not at all. In fact I think I read somewhere that the number of unintended pregnancies is either rising or one of the highest rates because we think we're past it when we're not, can't remember where I heard it though! Good luck x

FairlyIncognito · 09/01/2024 12:59

Sparks654 · 09/01/2024 08:38

Did you have any complications before you got pregnant or with the pregnancy itself. I don't have any kids but am wondering if I can try for a late baby at 43. I am worried though!

Show quote history

i did get gestational diabetes but it was very obvious to me (not to my midwives who took weeks to persuade as I am slim etc !) so I managed it carefully and once i was finally allowed to test and therefore diagnosed it was even better as I could test my blood sugar and keep it under control easily .