What boundaries did you have with visitors after giving birth?

[Herecomestreble1]

I'm due mid October and beginning to think about possible boundaries or similar I would like to set when our immediate family visits the baby. I am sure they will expect the obvious health-based ones such as no kissing the baby or washing hands before holding, but I'm curious as to what everyone else is considering communicating for those first few precious weeks?

Also due mid October 👋🏼 I’m having a section. My in laws will be v keen to see the baby, my own parents will go at whatever pace I want. In laws live 1.5hrs away and for some reason, aren’t capable of doing that journey without staying over for three nights. They are nice people but are an interfering pair of know alls, full of advice from 40 years ago, (leave the baby to cry / rod for your own back type advice) they don’t want to know about modern guidelines and get quite belligerent if you try and update them on current practices. There is real potential to irritate in my potentially vulnerable state.

So, I have told DH, after reading about other’s experiences on MN, that they can stay here while I’m in hospital, come and meet the baby on day 2 at the hospital and then we want to be left alone for a good week and see how we feel on week 2. I really don’t want overnight guests but they will be so offended if we suggest staying in a hotel. It’s a difficult one. My own parents, while very far from perfect, will just go with the flow.

Just what every newborn needs

What’s it got to do with my you? Pretty sure a newborn baby couldn’t GAF about visitors, having just been born and it’s mother and father being it’s universe

Any half decent folk will respect the parents’ wishes and will still be ‘interested’ in the baby, despite not meeting him/her for a week or so. Ridiculous to suggest otherwise.

So why don’t you give your own head a wobble (hate that cringey phrase) and you do you 🙄

Covid baby plus an initial 2 week hospital stay meant we saw no one in those first few weeks, even months really, and I still feel so sad about that. I would say embrace the visitors making a fuss!

I find this attitude very weird. I wanted people to visit so I could show off my baby and would be very offended if they hadn't!

For my first, absolutely none. Come see the baby, hug the baby, kids the baby, etc. It was a wonderful time.

For my second, the same, with one very specific boundary. Friends and family came round from when baby was a few hours old and it was wonderful.

My FIL's partner was not to visit in hospital. We'd been extremely low contact since my first trimester, and although I was happy for her to meet my baby, not when I was still hooked up to a catheter etc. She's meet up with the baby once a few weeks later, stormed out, and choose no longer to be part of our family. I'm glad that didn't happen in hospital.