Don’t know who the father is

[Anonymous5689]

Hi I’m trying to work out the father of my baby I went it for my first ultrasound and it told me I was 12 weeks + 1 day gestational age pregnant. I was unsure of my Menstrual periods and so the doctor told me my first day of my period is 3rd of March however I don’t remember bleeding that day … the doctor told me I conceived/ovulated around 17th of March . I had sex with a guy on 3rd of March and 14th which one do you think is more probable?

Tbh I think you're going to have to wait and see what the baby looks like. But if Dr is saying 17th then the guy on the 14th is most likely if you trust their dates.

You have around 5 fertile days each month, up to and including the day of ovulation. So the 14th is only 3 days away from your supposed ovulation date, that is almost certainly the one. The one on the 3rd is much to early.

Both unprotected presumably?

Thankyou for your responses

So the one on the 3rd we used protection however I am still worried because protection isn’t always so sure .

Could it be possible that ultrasounds at 12 weeks could be off by 2 weeks ?

You won’t know for sure unless you have a DNA test.

If you used protection on the 3rd

it is almost certainly likely it was when you had unprotected sex.

it would be worth telling midwife this so you can have a std test

Depends if the dads look sufficiently different or not. My child looks so much like her dad.

Not likely that they will be off by that much at the early stages. If it were a few days, then that would certainly be possible as implantation can occur later or earlier by a few days but a few weeks would be highly unlikely as there would be a large difference in baby's size.

But in saying that, the only way you will know for sure is through a DNA test after the baby is born.

It sounds like you would prefer it to be the guy on the 3rd of March, am I right in saying that??

I think its even more unlikely to be the one on the third. However I'd make sure the midwives know if you're worried about it.

Hotinnit... looks are definitely NOT a reliable way of determining parentage.

I have 2 siblings... both look nothing like me and none of us look much like our parents either. If you didnt know we were related, you wouldn't guess.

Gently OP, a doctor or midwife is going to be able to answer this question more accurately than Mumsnet.

Were you planning pregnancy? I'm surprised you didn't take the MAP after the unprotected sex with the second guy.

It's very likely he is the father due to the date and the fact it was unprotected.

I am hoping is the guy in the 14th .

It is if the child looks the spitting image of one of them and not the other

When doctors determine gestational age do the take implantation into consideration? So if implantation happened later could it be possible conception could have taken place on the 3rd of March ?

I also know the babies crl which is 56.6mm at 12 weeks plus 1 day .

Does baby’s development start at conception or implantation?

Do you remember having your period just before or just after the guy on the 3rd? From the scan it sounds like the guy on the 14th is the father. Do you remember when you got your first positive pregnancy test?

No an ultra sound at 12 will be accurate as they use the image to actually date the baby x

14th sounds more likely, given both the dates and lack of contraception on that occasion. But I suppose you can’t be 100% sure unless you DNA test once baby is here. Depends what your situation is though, as to whether you’d want to go down that route.

So I didn’t get my period on the 3rd March . Nor I had a period later . Last period I logged was in February began on the 2nd and ended on the 5th . It could be possible that I missed my period in March as my periods are quite irregular . And then ovulated 14 days before my next period in April maybe ?

At the moment prenatal paternity test is out of my budget it costs around £1000 the other case is after birth however I’m going to be very stressed leading up …

The scans are very accurate at this point so I think if they’ve said you ovulated on the 17th it’s the sperm that were there from the 14th (they can live up to 5 days in ur body) were the ones that fertilised the egg. I think also as you used contraception on the 3rd too it’s unlikely from this occasion although as you say not impossible. When did u get your positive pregnancy test? Did u have any earlier scans to date the pregnancy before the 12 week one if you weren’t sure of your period?

I took a first pregnancy test beginning of May the test strip said 3+ weeks . My first ever scan was when I was at 12 weeks + 1 days I didn’t have any earlier scans . That’s because I was bleeding on the 11th of April for a few days so I mistaken that for my period . Now looking back could that have been implantation ?

Gosh, lots of judgement here. OP didn’t ask if she should have had sex with two different men nor whether you think she should ‘sort her life out’.

How bloody rude

I think it was the 14th. I agree, no need for the judgemental comments. Hope you're ok OP x