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Original poster

Hiding pregnancy at a wedding

80 replies

itsmyfirst · 07/07/2022 07:56

Hi all,

I'm a guest at a wedding tomorrow. Obviously I won't be drinking (I'm going to drive) but as this is unusual for me, I know that I'll be under suspicion! Any tips on how to deflect attention or any excuses. I really don't want my friends knowing before my parents. I'm only 6 weeks and just found out yesterday that I'm expecting. Thanks so much.

OP posts:
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Homegettinginvaded · 07/07/2022 09:34

Antibiotics is not a reason not to drink BTW unless taking Metronidazole/ Flagyl !!

Original poster
itsmyfirst · 07/07/2022 09:35

Thank you for all the replies. I'm now planning on 'having' one glass of bubbles (but not actually drink it) and leave it at that.

Thank you!

OP posts:
Mischance · 07/07/2022 09:36

I don't drink and have never felt the need to make an excuse.

But if you are normally a happy drinker, then just say on antibiotics.

HSKAT · 07/07/2022 09:37

Antibiotics just screams I'm pregnant.

If they aren't exactly aware your driving just pretend, ask the bar to make a lemonade look like a gin with the fruits in etc.

pamplemousse19 · 07/07/2022 09:45

Surely driving is a good enough excuse?

I have a wedding coming up at the end of this month when I will be 9 weeks pregnant and won't be able to use the driving excuse (it's in central London and the wedding party are providing buses), so I am going to have to think of another excuse for myself before then - I'm usually a very happy drinker and drank everyone under the table at the hen party, so it will be obvious! I was going to use the antibiotics excuse, but it looks like that won't wash....

thinking123 · 07/07/2022 09:48

Have a gin and tonic worked for me. Obviously just tonic with a slice of lemon but no one noticed

LuckySantangelo35 · 07/07/2022 09:49

PurpleDaisies · 07/07/2022 09:22

She doesn’t want to because it’s early. That’s a perfectly valid reason.

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@PurpleDaisies

yeah it’s early….and?!

plus even before three months lots of people will know - often you gain weight etc before three months so people know anyway. Why hide it?!

PurpleDaisies · 07/07/2022 09:51

@LuckySantangelo35 its a personal choice. Sometimes things don’t work out and not everyone is comfortable sharing that widely.

Dsisproblem · 07/07/2022 09:52

Just hold a drink. No one notices then.

NerrSnerr · 07/07/2022 09:54

@LuckySantangelo35 because everyone is different and people choose to share things at different times for different reasons.

Strangertingz · 07/07/2022 10:13

@LuckySantangelo35 There is an increased risk of miscarriage during early pregnancy, most people don't want to talk about or explain that to their friends after already announcing pregnancies early. Did you really want people to point that out to you, on a nervous pregnant woman's post? Are you really that ignorant?

PipeScatter · 07/07/2022 10:20

"My turn to drive unfortunately - never mind - will make up for it next time! Plus, this way I get to record all the evidence of when you lot end up off your face!" - make a joke of it and people will move on.

If really pushed, just say you'd had a few glasses the night before and really don't feel up to it today.

DarkShade · 07/07/2022 10:20

People really won't mind, it never occurs to me to question why someone is not drinking. Driving is a good reason. I used to ask bar staff to pour non alcoholic beer into a pint glass.

Merryclaire · 07/07/2022 10:43

If it doesn’t seem strange for you to be driving, then that’s excuse enough. But if it’s local and you could easily get a taxi then your best bet is not to mention it and drink ambiguous looking drinks.

I don’t really drink and went to a wedding before I told anyone but they know I don’t drink so it wasn’t an issue!

DiamanteDelia · 07/07/2022 10:46

Just accept a drink but don't drink it and don't say anything. No one will be keeping track.

Making excuses about antibiotics etc- you may as well accessorise with a Baby on Board badge.

Lineala · 07/07/2022 10:46

I'm on metronidazole! Really I am. I hope people don't think I'm pregnant, it would be a miracle 😂

Original poster
itsmyfirst · 07/07/2022 10:50

Like the other poster pointed out, I don't want to tell anyone yet because of the risks. I have PCOS and am very aware of the increased risk of miscarriage as a result. If it happens, I'd like to be able to grieve privately first before telling anyone. Also, I know how nervous my mother would be for me so I want to wait a few weeks before telling her to spare her the worry. I don't want others finding out before my mother.

OP posts:
tabulahrasa · 07/07/2022 10:51

Lineala · 07/07/2022 10:46

I'm on metronidazole! Really I am. I hope people don't think I'm pregnant, it would be a miracle 😂

I’ve been on it for a dental infection, thing is, I was also really unwell both from the infection and the side effects. I mean - I’d have maybe struggled through a wedding because it’s a big thing, but I’d have pulled out of anything else tbh.

So very different to just not drinking.

Jsh125 · 07/07/2022 11:01

I went to a wedding when I was about 8/9 weeks. It was our best friends & lots of others friends there so it would've been really clear to see I wasn't drinking. I just had a glass of something at all times but didn't drink it - let them pour some wine at dinner then swapped it with my husband's half empty glass when no one was looking! Also let one person buy me a g&t & again just gave it to my husband / put it down & walked off after holding onto it for a while! I felt bad they'd wasted their money on me but was the only way to not raise suspicion when someone directly asks if you want a drink & you're empty handed 😂.
Definitely don't go for the antibiotics trick - it doesn't work!

motogirl · 07/07/2022 11:01

I'm driving is sufficient, a small sip of bubbly for the toast is fine, swop your 3/4 full glass with your Dp's empty glass. Refuse to do rounds and drink "gin" and tonic aka just tonic

GlitteryGreen · 07/07/2022 11:21

I hid successfully by drinking non-alcoholic beer and non-alcoholic gin, get yourself one of those if they do them at the venue, and then say you can only have that one due to driving.

JLQ1020 · 07/07/2022 12:50

PurpleDaisies · 07/07/2022 08:56

No one will believe that.

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Worked for me when I was pregnant I think as its such a daft reason for not drinking ppl just automatically believed me. Plus I was overweight so could do with losing a few pounds at the time

Amber17 · 07/07/2022 12:57

I had a wedding at 6 weeks, I took a glass of Prosecco round the post ceremony mingling and had a glass of wine on the table at dinner. At the end of the night some friends were surprised when I pulled the car keys out to drive home cos they thought I’d been drinking all night just from seeing me with two different glasses. People pay far less attention than you think, especially if you’re acting like usual in every other way like getting on the dance floor if you normally would!

Cakecakecheese · 07/07/2022 13:14

Driving is a perfectly acceptable reason.

I went out on New year's eve and drank blackcurrant and soda which could masquerade as dark fruit cider. Then dry January conveniently happened and I told people in February.

DontLikeCoffee · 07/07/2022 17:51

The more you try and explain why you’re not drinking the more someone will think you’re pregnant.

If you say antibiotics you might as well just have a flashing sign above your head. Just have a glass of wine in hand and pretend to drink, or have something alcohol free in a wine glass.