To go back to work tomorrow (pregnancy related sickness)

[Mol89]

I’m 34 weeks pregnant and have been off for the last two weeks with pregnancy related sickness. My sick note runs until mid next week which is my last week in work before I finish (annual leave starting at 36 weeks and then maternity).

Prior to this I had 4 weeks off in my first trimester when I was vomiting 20 times a day but have since been back at work with adjustments. Between 22 and 30 weeks I felt much better but recently I’ve had awful indigestion, heartburn, a return of the vomiting, a UTI that wouldn’t budge and bad back, rib and pelvic pain. I’ve had some ok days where I’ve managed a walk and did manage the food shop on Monday but have felt mostly awful for the last few weeks until today.

I’m supposed to be having a low key baby shower in a family members house at the weekend for which friends are travelling over. I didn’t want one at all but now it’s almost here after a really crap pregnancy, previous pregnancy loss and the effort people have gone to I want to go, however if I’m going to do this feel like I should go back to work tomorrow. My note says pregnancy related vomiting and nausea and today I haven’t vomited... This fills me with dread even though it’s only 6 days till I finish for a year.

My manager is on the face of it lovely but keeps giving thinly veiled threats ‘ohh if you’re still off sick next week we’ll trigger your maternity leave (said at 32 weeks)’, ‘you should be on a disciplinary now due to the time off (all genuine and protected pregnancy related absences).’ They did a couple of highly questionable things during my previous pregnancy and loss that I’m sure amount to discrimination. I also had reduced movements the last week I was in work and I’m sure it was work related stress.

Would it be wrong of me to go to my baby shower without going back to work first? It really is an afternoon in a family members house but I don’t want to get in to trouble. Unless I’m very unwell I was planning on going back mid for 2 days after my note ended to tie up loose ends.

You can't go back while your sick note is still in date unless you get a fit note from your GP.

You don't say what you do, but IMO it's a different thing to be fit to sit in someone's house at a baby shower and another thing being fit to work.

Tbh I'd just make sure none of it ends on Fb and go back next week

It does say on my note I can go back before the end of it if I feel able and my employer agrees, which I’m sure they would... My job is very different to one afternoon at baby shower and I’m sure I’ll go back to a long list of things although will involve long phone contacts I can wfh. Usually person facing and out and about but a mix of covid and adjustments means I can do a lot virtually and they wouldn’t make me go out on visits.

That is what I would like to do I don’t use social media (I do have fb etc but haven’t put anything on in years), friends could but don’t know my colleagues.